“And?” I asked. “Did you smooth things over?”
“Well, it was a real eye-opener, that’s for sure,” Julie said.
I tried to keep my anger in check. I couldn’t believe Julie would have dinner with Josh without telling me, that she would sneak around behind my back with my brother. Still, that didn’t explain why she was acting so cold. Unless she and Josh…
“Are you getting back together with him?” I asked bluntly. “Is that what this is about?”
“Are you kidding?” Julie’s eyes flashed. “How the hell could you even ask me something like that?”
“Well, I don’t know!” I threw my hands up in frustration. “I came over tonight to see you, and you’re practically throwing me out the door. Julie, what’s wrong? What happened at that dinner?”
“Josh and I talked,” Julie said. Her voice was low. Eerily calm. “He told me he still loves me and that he wants us to try again.”
Again, my stomach tightened with rage. I knew Josh would pull something like this. I’d never felt so ready to hit someone in my life. If it weren’t for Julie, I would have jumped in my car and driven to Dallas just to take a swing at my brother.
“Is that what you want?” I asked softly, terrified to hear her answer.
“No,” Julie said. “Just like I told him, that’s not how it works.”
“Good,” I said firmly. “He doesn’t deserve you.”
“Who does?” Julie asked, raising her eyebrows. “You?”
“No,” I said. I shook my head. “Honestly, I don’t think anyone deserves you.”
Julie’s face softened for a split second. It didn’t last long, but I saw it. Her eyes unfroze, and her lips went slack. She stared at me closely, and it was like nothing bad ever happened. It was just her and me, standing in her living room, hating the distance that existed between us.
Then, as suddenly as it came, it disappeared. She hardened again. Her jaw tightened, and her eyes locked. It was like the wall had slammed back in place, and there was nothing I could do to remove it.
“Julie,” I said. “If you’re not getting back together with him, then please, just tell me what’s wrong.”
As I begged, I already knew the answer. Julie wasn’t the kind of person to just turn off her emotions. She couldn’t just stop caring about someone unless she was given a damn good reason to do so. Before she even opened her mouth, I knew what she would say.
“Josh told me everything,” she said. “About how you knew who I was all along. He said he told you my name years ago. That you even looked me up on Facebook once or twice. He said there was no way you didn’t know exactly who I was when you saw me in the café that day.”
My entire world was crashing down around me. I never wanted Julie to find out the truth this way, not from Josh. Part of me always intended to tell her, but I didn’t know how. I was terrified that she would find out everything and run in the opposite direction.
“Is it true?” she asked.
“Julie…” I began, but she cut me off with a look.
“Just answer the question,” she said. “Is it true?”
“Julie…”
“Did you know who I was?” she demanded. “That day in the café, when you first spoke to me, did you know who I was?”
“Yes.”
Julie’s eyes closed, and her hands slowly moved to cover her mouth. She shook her head from side to side, pain etched in every line of her face. In that moment, I realized she was hoping for a different answer. She wanted Josh to be lying. She wanted to believe I would never deceive her. She wanted to trust me.
My heart felt like it was being stomped on. I took a small step forward and reached out to Julie. The second her eyes flew open, she jumped backward and glared at me with renewed anger.
“Get the hell out of my house,” she snapped.
“Please, just hear
me out first,” I said. “Please.”