I don’t know why, but when I think of this marriage being fake and temporary, it makes me sad. My emotions are all over the place. I’d love to blame it on PMS, but it’s nowhere near that time of the month.
I decide to lay down for a bit before I make dinner, try to distract myself from this marriage thing for a while. I pick up my phone and start scrolling through my emails, catching up on the latest celebrity gossip and news. My eyes start to feel heavy, and I let myself ease into sleep. Whoever furnished this place did an excellent job. Not only is it stylish, but it’s comfortable too. I’ve never owned such a cozy bed before. A few minutes of shut eye and then I’ll get up and make dinner.
Burying myself under my comforter, I fall asleep right away. I dream about my wedding, but in my dream it’s not pretend. It’s a grand affair with all of my family and friends there. Their smiling and approving faces surround me. The sun is low in the sky, light streaming through tall, lush trees. The dream is so real that I can feel the dappled sun on my skin, I can smell the forest air, fresh pine, and feel its damp coolness on my skin. I can hear the birds chirping from their perches high up and hidden from view. Clusters of butterflies flit around flower arrangements set up on tall tables surrounding the ceremony area. There’s a small clearing with chairs draped in white silk. Lights are strung up in rows overhead, looking like thousands of fireflies. The cascading flower arrangements fill the clearing with a fragrance that could only be described as happiness and light. I’m wearing a white sleeveless dress with intricate beading on the heart-shaped bodice and a flowing train. My something borrowed is my mother’s platinum Tiffany anklet that I’ve coveted since I was a child. My something blue is my grandmother’s firefly broach that I’ve turned into a hair clip, and my something new is my beautiful ring that’s being carried down the aisle on a pillow by the ring bearer.
My father is by my side, walking me down the aisle, our elbows linked. Lonnie waits for us with a smile so full of love and devotion I can’t help but start to cry. It’s a dream, but it’s so real that I ache when I wake up and realize none of it is true. There’s no wedding, no relationship. It’s all fake. But the tear trailing down my cheek isn’t. The emotions I feel are very real.
I wipe it away and look at the back of my wet hand, confused. I can’t believe I was just crying over a dream. But it was so real. So is this ache.
There’s a knock at the door and I hurry to wipe my face so there’s no trace of tears left on my cheeks. I wonder if my parents decided to come straight to my apartment instead of waiting for the weekend. My mom sounded anxious on the phone. It wouldn’t surprise me one bit if they drove over as soon as we hung up.
I open the door, but it’s not my parents. Lonnie stands at the threshold holding two cups of coffee. He’s wearing a different suit than he was wearing earlier in the day. Instead of his navy tie, he’s wearing a red one. The shock of color is bright and beautiful on him.
His steady, approving gaze starts at my bare feet, following all the way up my smooth, tanned legs, and up the t-shirt I changed into when I got home from work earlier. His gaze lingers on my breasts a short moment before meeting my eyes. His smile curves at one corner.
“I wanted to drive you to work this morning. That’s an interesting choice for work attire. Bold. I like it.”
“Work?” I say, confused.
I walk over to the windows where the curtains are closed. I feel Lonnie’s eyes following me. I throw open the curtains and see the early morning sun rising in the distance. My heart slams against my ribs so sudden and jarring that it makes me hiccup. I swing away from the window to look at the clock.
7AM.
Shit!
“I laid down to take a rest after work last night. How could I have slept straight through the night?”
It actually makes perfect sense I slept through the night. Yesterday was my first day of work as a lawyer. The day I finally fucked the man I’ve been lusting after for years. Then he proposed marriage to me, albeit fake. And to top it off, I had a pretty explosive and difficult conversation with my parents. It’s amazing I woke up when I heard Lonnie knocking at my door.