I take off toward the bar to ask Onyx…and stop short. My heart crashes right through my fucking chest.
Sadie’s standing at the corner of the bar, her hair swept up off her shoulders, her scar just visible through the sheerest part of her black dress. If you didn’t know it was there, you might not notice, because every other part of her painfully beautiful body is calling for your attention.
And I try to take it all in. My eyes want to devour her as badly as my mouth does. What’s more, she’s such a shock to my system—pure relief coupled with my desire for her—that I damn near come unhinged.
I decide that’s exactly what needs to happen, and I move in. Her eyes widen as she braces to absorb the impact. I crush her against me as my hands first go to her waist, her back, then bracket her face. I don’t know where to start first.
“I guess I made you wait too long,” she says, trying to diffuse some of the intensity.
“I’m going to kiss you,” I say. “In the middle of the voyeur, with everyone watching.” If that bastard is still here, I hope he sees. He won’t ever touch her as long as there’s a breath in my body.
She licks her lips, and that’s permission enough. My mouth is on hers, tasting, caressing, feeding the greedy demon inside me. I’m lost. Just a lost man. I died with Marni that night, and ever since I’ve been a ghost, merely haunting this world until Sadie resurrected me.
My hunger for her can’t be sated, so I break away and stare into her eyes. “I’ll give you whatever you want…tell you anything. Just don’t leave me tonight.”
Her gaze flicks over my face. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Taking her hand, I lead her out of the voyeur and toward the rope room. My personal room is the closest thing we have to a sanctuary—the one place that no one other than me has access to.
I unlock and open the door, then pull her inside, shutting out the threats of the world behind us. I throw the lock and press my hands against the door. “The killer is in the club. Somewhere. Or he was,” I admit.
“What? How do you know?”
“He sent me a pic of you. How long have you been here?”
“A couple of hours at least, but how do you know it’s him?”
“You didn’t answer my calls.”
“I don’t have a phone. Now tell me.”
My hands stay anchored to the door, as if I can protect her with just this barrier. “I did something to make him angry. And apparently, I’m to pay for that.” The image of Sadie flashes across my eyes, and I squeeze them shut. This bastard knows right where to strike at me to make me bleed.
I feel her hand on my shoulder. “Tell me the truth.”
Laying my hand atop hers, I clasp her fingers and bring her around as I turn to face her. “I don’t know where to start,” I say honestly.
“Just start.” She gives my hand a pump, then backs away, giving the room a once over. This time, she’s not distressed as she looks around, examining the equipment. Her gaze slides over the toys and ropes with fascination instead of apprehension.
She reaches out for me, and I accept her comfort, linking our fingers together. “Colton, you unbound me, and you continue to set me free a little more every time we’re together. Nothing you can say will change that.”
Inhaling a shaky breath, I fill my aching lungs. “That’s all I wanted, goddess. Just to show you how beautiful you are; how I see you. If I’ve done that much, then whatever penance I have to suffer is worth it.”
Her smile sets my skin aflame, and I hate that I’m about to chase it away.
I don’t hold back. I don’t have a choice. The note, the image…the sadistic fuck stalking her…it’s my fault. Somehow, I brought this down on her, and I’ll be the one to end it.
“I killed Marni.” The words are released, and they hover in the air like a plume of smoke after a bomb detonates. The resounding boom of my heart echoes in my ears, and I have to say more to stop the pounding. “Carson wants to pin it on my brother, because admittedly, Julian is a fraud. He’s not real about the lifestyle. He likes the women and he likes the power of owning the club…and he makes a crazy living by blackmailing a lot of people, and he probably deserves one hell of an ass kicking, but he didn’t murder Marni. He’s not a killer. I am.”
And there it is. The truth of me. My black soul seized right out of the abyss and lain at her feet. I wait for the shock of it to hit. For her to pull away. For her face to register the disgust about being with the monster she spends her days and nights loathing.
But her soft features don’t change. She’s still looking at me as if she knows me, as if she trusts me. “You’re not a killer.”
I’m the one to pull away then. “That detective is an asshole, but he’s right, Sadie. That rope he has? It’s just like the one I used to strangle Marni. It’s the rope you wear around your wrist.” I nod toward her arm. “I’m a sadist. That’s why I couldn’t let you believe you were wrong, goddess. You’re everything right. You’re looking at the twisted monster.”
“You’re not a monster,” she says.
“Why are you doing this? I’m trying to be honest with you—”