“I think that if your blood work comes back clean,” he said, shrugging, “we will have a ton of options to discuss. I've seen cases much worse than yours end up happy in the end. Just relax, breathe deeply, and let’s wait for the results. Once I have those in my hands, I’ll be able to really give you a definitive answer.”
“Okay,” I said, forcing a smile.
“I’ll see you in a couple of days.” He left the room, shutting the door behind him to give me privacy.
I wanted to get dressed, but I couldn’t seem to force myself to move from the spot where I was. There were so many things to think about, and my mind was all over the place. What if I could have children? What would Jason say? What would Jordan say? I knew I didn’t want him back. I had already decided we weren’t right for each other, but I still couldn’t help but wonder what would have happened if he had taken the time to look up doctors, do research, and wait for this amazing second opinion. Just the thought of it made me realize even more that Jordan wasn’t right for me. He gave up before there was any definitive proof of anything. He ran without a thought in his mind, and honestly, it might have been the best thing in the entire world for me. But now that I had options but no husband, it was kind of a moot point. I mean, I could have a child on my own, but I didn’t want to. I wanted a family with someone I loved. I guess having the knowledge that I could even have children when I was ready was enough peace of mind to fully move on from all of this and look forward toward the future. That’s exactly what Jason wanted for me, and that was what I was going to take from all of this.
I got dressed quickly, not wanting to spend any more time in the doctor’s office than I had to. I texted Jason that I was done, and he asked to meet me at the café by work for lunch. I smiled at the thought of drinking a hot coffee, snuggled up in a booth next to him. I pulled on my jacket and left the office, grabbing a cab and heading toward the café. The entire time in the cab, I thought about the tests. Would this doctor tell me the same things everyone else had? My biggest fear was that all of this was for nothing, and I would have gotten my hopes up just to have them shot down. I guess knowing was better than going the rest of my life wondering, but I wasn’t sure if I could take another blow, especially for something I hadn’t really come to terms with yet. I took in a deep breath and pushed the thought from my mind, deciding that I needed to be positive. And for God’s sake, I had taken a long enough break from life. It was time to jump back in and move forward instead of just standing still.
When I arrived, Jason was waiting and he opened the cab door for, taking my hand and helping me up onto the curb. I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face in his neck, taking in a deep breath of his cologne, which calmed my nerves. He pulled back and smiled, kissing me on the forehead and looking deep in my eyes for some kind of answers. I smiled softly at him, letting him know I was okay. He took my hand, and we walked into the café, grabbed a table at the back, and waited for our lunch to be ready.
“So,” he said smiling. “How did it go?”
“He seems to think that as long as my tests come back the same as before, there are options for me to get pregnant when I’m ready,” I said excitedly. “I mean I’m trying not to get too ahead of myself, but this is just such amazing news.”
“That is amazing news,” Jason said, clinking his coffee cup against mine.
“I just don’t want to be let down,” I said with a sigh. “So, I am trying to keep my mind busy. I decided that I am coming back to work. I want to start back tomorrow and hit the ground running. I’ve had too much time off, and I’m ready.”
“Well, I will be more than happy to have you back,” he said, kissing my cheek. “I just want to know that you’re doing everything at your own pace.”
“I am.” I smiled. “You are always looking out for what’s best. You are so good to me.”
“You deserve it.” He looked like he wanted to say something else, but he stopped himself and took a sip of his coffee instead.
We spent his lunch hour talking about me coming back to work, what that meant for me, and what that meant for the company. He was genuinely excited to have me back at the office, and to be honest, I was just as excited to be back. I still needed to call John and let him know, but there was no way he would argue with it, especially with the piles of files that seemed to be increasing every time I walked into the office. Not only would this get everything off my mind, but I would also get to see Jason every day, which was a really awesome bonus to all of this. He had been m
y rock, and I hadn’t even expected it. Each time he looked at me, touched me, or was even in the same room as me, I immediately felt better. A crazy calm would roll over me like a wave, and I loved every second of it. He reached over and touched my hand, sending chills down my back, and I smiled, feeling safe and secure. When he looked down at his watch, signaling he was running out of time, my stomach almost dropped, but I told myself it was okay. I just needed to make it through the night, and I would be back in action, lots of things to keep my mind busy.
“I have to get back,” Jason said with disappointment in his voice. “We have meetings today, and now that you aren’t the mystery girl anymore, they aren’t really cutting me any slack.”
“Aw.” I stuck out my bottom lip. “I understand. Text me later if you aren’t busy.”
“Of course.” He stood and leaned over to kiss my forehead. “Do you want me to get you a cab?”
“No,” I said, looking down at my coffee. “I’m going to hang out here for a little bit and enjoy my last afternoon of freedom before it’s back to the grind. I have to call your father anyway and tell him.”
“I can tell him for you,” he said, smiling.
“No, I better be the one to make that call,” I said. “We have to at least give the illusion that we’re going to try to be professional at work.”
“Pfft,” Jason laughed. “No problem.”
He kissed me again and walked out of the door. Once he was no longer in sight, I picked up my phone and dialed Mona, wanting to let her know how the doctor’s appointment went. I knew she was waiting for my phone call, almost as excited as I was to know that I had options.
“Hey,” I said when she answered.
“So,” she said impatiently. “How did it go?”
“It looks like there is a good chance I might still be able to have a baby,” I said excitedly. “The doc is going to call me as soon as the test results come back.”
“Oh, Tiff, that is so amazing,” she said with a deep breath releasing from her lungs. “Are you happy?”
“Yeah.” I sighed, part relief and part exhaustion. “It’s a lot to process.”
“Do you think you will get back with Jordan if babies are possible?”
“What? No.” I laughed. “I realized very quickly that Jordan and I weren’t meant to be in any shape or form. If I can have children, they will not be his. He lost that shot when he walked away before he even tried to see if anything could be done.”