I want freedom. I never realized how wrong I was in thinking I wanted a boyfriend, before Roman sold me. I’m done with guys. I don’t need a man. I just need me.
Caspian’s eyes drop to his pants, and I know he wants me to continue undressing him, as he requested.
I squat down in front of Caspian, refusing to kneel. It would feel too much like I’m submitting, and I’ve had Dante’s cock shoved down my throat in that position too many times for me to ever voluntarily get in that position again.
I untie his shoes, careful not to look up at him as I do. I don’t need to stir any other feelings, whether pleasant or scary, inside me.
When I’ve untied his shoes, I carefully remove them. I stare at his shoes a second longer, before I realize they aren’t designer shoes. In fact, I would bet they didn’t even cost him a hundred dollars. They look nice, but anyone who knows fashion wouldn’t be fooled.
I toss the shoes aside.
“Careful with those,” Caspian snarls.
I chuckle. “Why? The shoes are cheap. You don’t spend any of the money you supposedly make.”
Caspian grabs my arm and jerks me up. “I asked you to undress me, not comment on the amount of money I do or don’t have. I don’t have Carini money, that’s true, but I wasn’t handed money like you were. I earned every penny. How much money have you actually earned?”
I narrow my eyes, and my anger pulses through me. “You don’t think I earned every dollar I was given? I may not have had a traditional job that brought in new money, but I earned every dollar of my inheritance. Being a Carini isn’t easy. Especially being a daughter. There was a reason I was so desperate to find a man on my own. I needed a way out. And the only way to leave was by marrying a wealthy man. Even after my father was gone, it didn’t change anything. I was still a woman living in a man’s world. Seen as nothing but charming arm candy.
“You don’t think my leg was the first broken bone I’ve ever experienced? Those bruises on my face weren’t my first either. My father used to call me a whore. And Dante’s men, you killed in front of me to try and scare me, are just a few of hundreds of deaths I’ve seen before. Don’t tell me I didn’t earn the money I have! I’ve spilled more blood and tears earning my money than you have.”
My body trembles as I speak. Not from fear, but from the passion in which I speak. I’ve always felt like I was nothing. Not important. I never brought in any money. I never went to college. I have no special skills. But I do know, unlike other heiresses, I’ve earned everything. And I won’t let Caspian take it away from me with a few words.
“My pants,” Caspian says after a few seconds pass.
I glare at him as I roughly remove his belt, then undo the button of his pants, before shoving his pants down. Ensuring to scrape my nails against his legs as I push them down.
I cross my arms, taking a step back now that I’ve finished undressing him, still steaming.
But then I get a glance of his body. His thighs are bigger than both of my legs combined. Muscles meant for hard work. But it’s what’s between his legs that has all of my attention. His cock is long and thick, pointing directly at me. He wants me.
I should be disgusted by his cock. I’ve seen enough of them since I was sold to know it doesn’t matter how beautiful of a cock the man has, or how gorgeous the man is, I still don’t want a dick inside me that I haven’t invited in willingly. But his…
I’m drooling thinking about his delicious cock. I want to feel his dick. I want his thighs pounding it inside me. I’ve dreamed about sex with Conti. I’ve imagined it, but even in my imaginations, I never thought his body would be this perfect. I try to think back to the last time he raped me, but he never showed me his body then. Maybe if he did, that time would have been more enjoyable.
No. No. No.
Caspian still wants to rape me. He wants to hurt me. Force me to have sex with him. It doesn’t matter if I’m attracted to him, this is still wrong.
My body doesn’t understand the difference between right and wrong right now. All it knows is that there is an incredibly attractive man with a cock straining to be inside me. My nipples are hard peaks beneath the thin T-shirt that I know Caspian can see. My cheeks are flushed, and my eyes tell him exactly what I want his cock to do.
I wish this were different. I wish I weren’t his captive. Then I would be flirting with him, happy to have a one night stand with him. Instead, I’m doing everything I can to make the walls of my pussy clench up tight, instead of dripping with desire to welcome him in.
Caspian smirks.
And my mouth drops. The bastard knows exactly what he’s doing. It’s why he had me undress him first. He knew I would find him attractive. He knew I would be conflicted.
Fucking bastard.
“Now, it’s my turn.”
I gasp as his mouth comes down on mine. His hand cradles the back of my neck, and his lips smash into
mine. I haven’t been kissed since Roman. Dante and the rest slobbered, but those weren’t kisses. And before I realize what my traitorous body is doing, I’m kissing him back.
His lips are so soft and sweet. So different than the way the rest of him is behaving. I can’t help but moan as we kiss. I’ve been so deprived of anything that feels like love. I’m desperate to keep the kiss going. My tongue massages his. My lips push hard against his, needing more and more of the kiss. My hands wrap into his thick hair, keeping his mouth against my lips.
But just as I get what I want, he pulls away, stopping the kiss. I’m breathless, but I will never admit I liked the kiss, or want him to do that again. Never.