"It's dumb," I said. "It's not a big deal."
"Then why can't you smile?"
I tried to, just to prove her wrong, but my mouth wouldn't move. It felt weirdly heavy. What was going on?
"I got involved with a guy who didn’t want me.”
“I already knew that. Why the long face?”
“He’s back in town.”
"I can't believe that you care.”
“About what?"
“About little boys who can’t man up.”
"Well, he won." I thought about everything that she'd said to me. “He definitely won."
"Don't be a sucker," Jessica said as she parked. "You'll be fine. Either you'll get back together or you won't. We can find a guy for you to hook up with tonight if you want."
"Sure." I didn't really feel like hooking up with someone for a one-night stand. I looked out the windows. It was amazing and I just couldn't get over how much lush greenery was just everywhere. The abundance of rain made it easy to grow things here.
"We're going to a beer garden and then we're going to club hop. You're coming with." She looked at my shoes, which were flats. "Okay, if I'd noticed your shoes before now, we would've gotten you better ones before we left the house."
I shrugged. "Too late."
She opened her door. I followed her out and wound through the streets, trying to keep up. She moved like an Amazon. People flowed around her and I just tried to stay close in her wake.
"We're getting really drunk tonight," she said. "And I hope a nice man offers to take you home."
I felt my eyes get hot. I didn't want to hook up with anybody. "Maybe," I said. We walked to the beer garden and tried to sit down at the tables outside before she saw her bestie Kristen and we had to move to the inside. There weren't many people there yet, not at this point of happy hour. So we went and sat down. As soon as we did, a guy named Sebastian came with our menus.
"Hey folks, I'll be your server tonight. Our special is the chicken schnitzel on a panini. Please let me know if you need any help deciding."
"Thank you," I said as he walked away. He'd also left two drink menus, which were fascinating. They had all sorts of beers, including a lot of ones with which I was particularly familiar.
"What do you want?" Jessica asked, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "I'm going to go for light beer. Probably a Pilsener."
"Cool," I said. "That sounds great to me."
Jessica left me alone at the table with Kristen. We talked about the weather while Jessica grabbed drinks for all of us. She came back with a tray.
"How big are those?" I yelped. They were monster-sized cups of beer.
"One liter," she said. "And you're welcome."
I shook my head. "There's no way that I can drink all of that."
"Believe in yourself," she said.
I smiled and walked towards the bathroom. When I got in there, I splashed cold water on my face. I needed to wake up and stop moping. Jessica had done the right thing, dragging me out tonight, because I just didn't know what I'd do with myself besides eat some ice cream and possibly cry.
It hurt me so much to break up with someone I was really into. What kind of monster decides to do that? It would be kinder if I weren't interested in Massimo, but I was. And that's why this was so hard.
I needed to go back to the table before Jessica came into the bathroom and bullied me out. I used the facilities before walking back to the table. Jessica was in full swing, talking to Kristen. One of Kristen's friends was quietly drinking and just taking things in next to me. He also had a huge container of beer.
I let the cool beer slide down my throat. There was little that I enjoyed more than very cold beer. This beer garden definitely had that part of the experience down.