“Maybe. I don’t know what I want, Andrei. That’s why I came here.”
“I’d never want to be the one to hurt you, and I’m not going to be the asshole who talks you out of your dream. I know how hard you’ve worked for this. I would never do hold you back.”
What if she wanted him to? Maybe she needed someone who wasn’t so damn supportive and pulled her the other way for a change. Why couldn’t he be the one to do that?
“Come with me.” The words left her lips before she’d even had time to process what that meant to either of them.
“What?” At least he finally looked at her that time. “What exactly are you asking me?”
“We could both go to Chicago…together.”
He ran his fingers through his hair. “Just up and leave everything?”
“I didn’t mean it like that. I just thought…”
He leaned over and grabbed her hand. “I’m not upset. In any other lifetime, I’d be happy to at least consider going with you, but I can’t leave New York.”
“I get it. Your family’s practice needs you. It’d be ridiculous for them to just let you move like that.”
“It’s not about my father’s law firm. I wish it were that simple.”
Her anxiety raced back as she tried to decipher his meaning. “I know we’ve barely been together long enough to make that kind of decision.”
“That’s not it either. Victoria, I have no doubt about us. That’s not what I’m saying.”
“Then just tell me. I’m a big girl, Andrei. I can take it.” When he didn’t say anything, she brought up one of the reason’s she worried about in the back of her mind but never voiced out loud. “Is it because I’m black and you’re white?”
She jumped when he dropped the salad for and it clanged to the ground. He was on her side of the counter before she even knew what was happening.
Andrei gripped her shoulders tightly and kissed her like a man possessed. It wasn’t gentle or soft. His lips and tongue invaded hers until thoughts weren’t even there to haunt her mind anymore. He consumed her, and she had no choice but to do the same to him.
When he pulled back, his face was filled with determination and some anger, but it didn’t feel directed at her.
“Don’t you ever think I don’t want you because of something as stupid as that,” he said. “Ever.”
She smiled as he kissed her again, and she tried to do as he demanded and push all thoughts of that out of her head for good. She already had too much to going on in there, and she’d find out soon enough if she had something else of his to worry about.
Chapter 12
Andrei
When Victoria said those words, he’d nearly lost it. That’d she’d even think it made him want to kiss that shit away and replace it with something more real: how much he wanted her. Erik was right. Nothing like that mattered.
Andrei had developed some strong feelings for Victoria, and it blew his mind just how much he cared about her. Was it love?
He’d been in love before, but it was nothing like this. His past relationships had been hard and draining. Being with Victoria felt easy and real.
If he wanted something more with her, he had to get past his damn stubbornness and come clean to her. He needed to tell her about the two people in his life who were his world. It wasn’t going to get easier. He also knew the longer he put it off, the more excuses he’d make for not saying anything. That would only make her angry with him, and her anger would break him.
“Victoria, I have something important to talk to you about.” He took her hand and led her to the couch. Dinner would have to wait, because his news couldn’t.
“Is it something bad?” she asked.
How did he answer that? To him, Asya and Nadia were the two best things he’d ever done, even if their mother made it difficult for him. “That depends on how you look at it. To me, it isn’t.” He sat down and pulled her close to him on the couch. He needed to touch her, in case it was one of the last times she’d let him. “There’s a reason why I can’t leave any time soon.”
“You’re making me nervous,” she said and gripped his hand tight. “Just tell me you aren’t secretly married or something.”
He couldn’t help letting out a chuckle, which relieved some of his tension. “I’m not married. I was, but we got a divorce.”