Thank God, Chloe thought. Her stomach settled a little. “Then why the fear?”
“Because I started imagining being a father,” he ground out.
Merrick stood and paced, hands in his pockets. Chloe took a moment to digest all Merrick had revealed. She thought back to that first time she’d mentioned wanting to get pregnant. She’d ached to fill their house with the laughter of a baby. With total clarity she could see that day in her head as if it were yesterday. Six months. She’d brought up the subject six months ago, right after breakfast on a Saturday morning. Immediately afterward, Merrick’s schedule had filled with work. He’d literally poured every ounce of himself into the business. Deep down, she knew her husband would be the best father in the world, but how could she convince him when he seemed so insecure?
Chloe stood and went to him. She wrapped her arms around his middle and buried her nose in his navy blue t-shirt. He stood as still as a marble statue, as if afraid of letting himself be comforted. His arms slowly came around her shoulders, and soon his embrace was so tight she had to struggle to breathe.
When an elderly couple walked by and grinned, it immediately reminded Chloe of their very public surroundings. Chloe wiggled, and Merrick loosened his hold. He gazed down at her, his eyes so filled with worry it nearly broke her heart.
She cupped his cheek and smiled. “I know you’ll be a terrific father.” He started to protest, but she placed two fingers against his lips and said, “But only when you’re ready. I never meant to pressure you. Having a baby is a decision we both need to make.”
Merrick didn’t speak. He simply leaned down and fastened his lips to hers as if desperate for her taste. Her muscles went into instant meltdown as she gave him every ounce of love she could give. As his tongue found its way inside her mouth, Chloe groaned, enjoying his stimulating flavor. When Merrick broke the kiss and stared down at her, Chloe had to force her raging hormones back into their cage.
“I don’t deserve you, Chloe,” he said, caressing her cheek. “I never did.”
Merrick’s eyes were over-bright, as if close to tears. Chloe had never seen her husband so overwhelmed with emotion. Knowing he was close to losing control slashed at her soul.
“That’s nonsense. All these worries you have are unfounded, Merrick. You’re a good man and everyone knows it…except you.”
“If I’m so good, why is it I nearly lost you?”
Chloe stepped out of Merrick’s arms and started to gather up their trash and leftovers. “The hotel did a wonderful job putting together the picnic, don’t you think?”
Merrick bent to help. “Yeah, but why are you avoiding my question?”
Chloe stopped and stared at the used napkin in her hand. “Because I’m not sure our marriage is out of the woods.” Her gaze locked with his as she gave h
im the bold truth. “I understand better now and I appreciate your honesty. I wish I’d known six months ago how you really felt. It might have made a difference.” She tossed the napkin into a paper bag. “I’m so afraid that when this week is over you’ll go right back to working around the clock, and where does that leave me? Where does that leave us?”
Merrick clasped Chloe’s face in his palms. “That won’t happen. On my honor, that won’t happen. I know it’s hard to believe now, considering my track record, but you have to have faith.”
“I want so badly to believe you and that scares me.”
Merrick rubbed his thumb over her bottom lip and murmured, “Every couple has problems, babe. There is no such thing as a perfect marriage.”
“I know, I do, and I never asked for perfection, just a flesh and blood husband.”
He angled his head and kissed her. Chloe’s knees went weak. He could so easily turn her inside out. It seemed so unfair at times. As if he had more command over her body than she.
Chloe pulled back an inch and watched him lick his lips. Even that small action drove her imagination wild.
“We have something going for us that a lot of couples don’t,” he stated. “We’re in love. And I happen to think it’s the forever kind of thing. You’re not ready to walk away from what we have together.”
She couldn’t deny his words. The fact she’d come to Hawaii with him was proof enough that she was willing to work it out. What neither of them said aloud was that she had taken the first step. The hardest step. She’d left him. At one time she would have sworn she’d never make such a bold move.
Chloe finished gathering the trash in silence and together they folded the blanket. Merrick slung it over his shoulder as Chloe searched out a waste bin for their trash.
Hand in hand they headed back to the hotel, her mind a jumble of thoughts and feelings. Merrick was the first to break the silence.
“Let’s go parasailing.”
Definitely not what she expected. “Parasailing?”
“Why not? We can drop off the blanket and get our swimsuits on and be out on the water within the hour.”
Chloe laughed, feeling a lot more carefree than she had in a long time. “Let’s do it!”
The sexy glint of arousal in Merrick’s eyes kick-started her heart. “I love it when you get that wild look, babe.”