Rider turned to Cassie. “Can you wait here and give us a minute?”
She forced a smile. “Of course.”
On the other hand, Victoria didn’t say a word, just stared at him, her expression cold and distant and nothing like the loving woman he’d gotten to know.
When she moved to sit on the couch, her body cocooned in a heavy brown blanket, Rider took a chance and sat next to her. Christ, he wished like hell he could wrap his arms around her and pull her against him, but she didn’t want anything to do with him. She was pulling away, physically and emotionally.
“Won’t you at least look at me?” When she sat still and silent, he went on. “Shutting me out won’t make this go away.”
“Why are you even here, Rider?” She threw her arms in the air. “What’s the point?”
Every muscle in his body went rigid at the icy bitterness in her voice. “What’s the point?” he repeated, anger getting the better of him.
“We both had fun. The end. There is no need to explain anything.”
“The hell there isn’t,” he bit out. “I care about you, and I’m not going to let you go without a fight.”
“Look at me.” She gestured to the large blanket covering her, and her streaked makeup. “This is the real me. No sexy clothes, no high heels. Just sweats and oversize T-shirts. Still think you care about me?”
He saw red. “I care about you, Vic, not all the trappings. I told you that before.”
“Whatever,” she groused. “I won’t debate this with you. I’ve got a full day tomorrow, and I need some sleep, so start talking.”
He’d never heard Victoria sound so remote. It was as if she was a completely different person. He was a desperate man, though, drowning in his own mess.
Rider took hold of her chin and forced her to look at him. “You aren’t going to bed, and you sure as hell aren’t shutting me out anymore. You’re going to let me explain.”
To his shock and delight, an angry gleam lit Victoria’s eyes. He saw it as a good sign, because she was at least feeling something. “So talk,” she urged.
“I—”
Victoria slapped a hand over her mouth and stood abruptly, then raced from the room. He heard a door slam and wondered if he should go after her. “Fuck,” he muttered.
“God, Rider,” Cassie said as she strode toward the chair adjacent to him. “I’m so sorry about all this.”
The sound of Cassie’s voice startled him. He’d all but forgotten about her. “I know, but I’m going to fix it.” He had to, because the alternative wasn’t an option.
Victoria tucked her hair behind her ears and turned the bathroom faucet on. She needed to clear her mind. Losing it wasn’t going to help a damn thing. She cupped her hands and splashed icy-cold water over her face until the need to throw up subsided. She didn’t want to think anymore, didn’t want to hurt. Didn’t want to admit that Rider was in love with another woman. She didn’t want to think that he’d used her. Her brain pulled at her agony a little more and pushed another thought to the front of her mind. Had they laughed at her? No, she refused to believe it. Rider wasn’t that cruel. She knew that.
Victoria turned the water off and grabbed a towel to dry her face. She looked at herself in the mirror and wondered what Rider saw in her, what made him so anxious to repair their budding relationship. She wasn’t anything truly remarkable, and she was too ordinarily built to hold a man’s attention for more than a few passing minutes, and yet Rider seemed enthralled with her.
Somewhere deep in her heart, Victoria knew he would never bring her pain. His words came straight from his heart, and he had said he cared for her. And God help her, but she wanted to believe that. If nothing else, she did trust him, and what did that say about her state of mind exactly? She trusted a man who had a fiancée hidden away? Yeah, right, she really had lost it. She’d gotten too involved with Rider. And if he had a fiancée, what did that say for Reena? She’d fixed them up, after all. Was she in the dark about Cassie too?
Victoria dried her face on the soft fluffy black towel hanging on the hook next to the tub, giving in to the luxurious feel of it against her skin. She sighed and replaced it.
When she went back out to the living room, Rider stood. “Are you okay, sweetheart?”
Her eyes shot darts of anger toward him, her voice hoarse from crying nonstop. “It will never be all right again, Rider. Not ever again.”
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I know that doesn’t take away your pain, but I never meant this for you.”
Somewhere in Victoria’s haze of pain, she saw the honest torment in his sad eyes. Yet, as repentant as he was, it would never turn back the clock, never undo the wrong he’d done to her. But the truth had smacked her in the face when she had felt the first stress-filled rumble in her stomach. She was and would always be in love with Rider. How could she ever look at another man? When her stomach churned again, Victoria was thrown back in time to another stomach-clenching episode. She’d been six, and her mother had said she’d had some bad chicken at a restaurant they’d gone to for dinner that day. That was what had caused the awful pain in her stomach.
She could still hear her mother’s voice, feel her mother’s soft touch as she stroked Victoria’s sweat-soaked brow, telling her all would be fine again in the morning. At the time, she was sure she was going to die from the pain of it, but then the night wore on, and the next thing she remembered was waking up on the couch with her head resting on her mother’s warm lap. Her first thought was that her mother had been right. All was fine again.
Things had turned out okay then; things would turn out okay this time as well. She only needed patience. Victoria raised her head high and crossed the room. After taking the seat she’d so hastily vacated moments ago, Victoria glanced over to see Rider and Cassie worriedly looking on. Neither said a word, but he didn’t have to speak for her to know that he was internally beating himself up. “Okay, I’m listening.”
Rider took her hand in his and said, “Cassie and I aren’t in love. There is no relationship. We’re just friends. That’s all we’ve ever been.”