s. Though with each one, it becomes more and more unlikely that one day he’ll realize that maybe, just maybe, his feelings for me are more than those of just friendship.
“If Chadwick was trying to sleep with her, then he’s in for a huge disappointment,” Annabel says. “I heard she got engaged to some writer. Maybe this hunk she came in with.”
I take a sharp breath, my ears burning at the word ‘engaged.’ At that moment, Jack sees me. There’s a brief flash of surprise in his eyes. Then he smiles, and my whole body fills with longing.
“Yup, he’s the one.” One of the women holds up her phone, which has a popular gossip site open on the browser. I force myself not to look at the headline or the pictures.
Claudia is busy introducing Jack and Chadwick, and as I watch, Chadwick starts to lead them both towards us.
“I’m going to go to the bathroom,” I say to no one in particular. Finding a nearby table to place my champagne flute, I turn my back on all of them and find an exit. Outside the restaurant, I lean on the railing, breathing in cool, filtered air as I try to regain my composure. I let my eyes travel from the crystal chandelier hanging from about a floor above, down to the magnificent entrance lobby on the ground floor. It’s a beautiful hotel, with old classic architecture and evidence of careful, unstinting maintenance. Too bad that my first visit has been spoiled by having to watch the man I love with yet another woman.
I take a deep breath and start for the elevator, knowing that I don’t want to go back inside and see Jack with his beautiful date again. I’ll have to apologize to Chadwick later, but I doubt he’ll mind too much. There’re probably one or two women already waiting to go home with him.
“Rachel.”
Jack’s voice stops me in my tracks. I turn around, trying to control the intense longing that fills me as my eyes land on him. “Hi Jack.” I force a smile. “Didn’t know you were back.”
He shrugs. “It was kind of sudden.” His gray eyes, travel over my dress, then come back to settle on my face. “You look incredible.”
“Thanks.”
There’s an awkward silence. Usually, we have so much to talk about. By now I’d have been quizzing him about his trip, about skydiving with Reese Fletcher, and he would have been giving me his typical funny answers. But not today. Does he have any idea how I’m feeling? Is he aware of how much being his friend has cost me these two years? How painful it is for me whenever I see him with other women?
I doubt it. After he rejected me, I became much better at hiding my feelings.
“It’s nice to see you,” he says, moving closer. His lips curve in a small, familiar smile. “I wasn’t expecting you to be here, but I’m glad you are. Don’t tell me you’re leaving?”
“I…Yes I am, actually.”
“That’s a shame.” He looks disappointed, and for a moment, I imagine that maybe he was looking forward to spending time with me. That hope goes out of the window with his next words. “You didn’t meet Claudia.”
Claudia Sever. The model he came with. The void in my stomach widens. “Is it true?” I ask. “Are you engaged?”
He smiles. “It’s crazy, isn’t it? Who would have thought I’d ever settle down?”
“Yes,” I agree, my heart breaking. “Who would have thought?”
The silence stretches again. I’m supposed to wish him happiness, like a good friend would do, but I can’t bring myself to say the words. Not when I was still holding on to the hope that when he finally took that step, it would be with me.
I force a small laugh, and even to me it sounds fake, and sad. “So what happened? You told me you could never settle down with any one woman.”
He frowns. “That was a long time ago.”
My eyes cloud. It’s hard to understand how your feelings for someone can be everything to you, and yet nothing to them. “Sometimes it still hurts like yesterday,” I say softly.
“Rachel…” he closes the distance between us and places comforting hands on my shoulders, “You know I do love you.”
The words come out of his mouth so easily. Words that in other circumstances would mean the world to me.
“Then why…” I stop before I make a total fool of myself. Why can’t we be together? Why do you keep breaking my heart?
“Rachel,” he says firmly, “We’re friends. You should be happy for me.”
I push away from him, letting his hands fall from my shoulders. “We were more than friends, and it was good. It was wonderful. It was the best thing that ever happened to me.” I stop talking, seeing the situation for what it really is. Me, throwing myself yet again at a man who has made it clear that he doesn’t want me.
His silence adds to my shame. I close my eyes. “I wish you all the best,” I murmur, before turning away and hurrying towards the elevators. I can feel tears stinging at my eyes, and I blink furiously to keep them from falling.
God! I should have thrown his friendship in his face when I had the chance.