Made me whole again.
“Yeah? So?”
“Lex and Jam don’t usually fight, Nash. They’re usually buddies. Something happened tonight, though. I think someone wanted them to fight, wanted to cause dissention.”
“What do you mean?”
“Someone wants to stir up trouble in the pack, Nash. Someone doesn’t like you being Alpha.”
***
By the time I finally return to our suites, I’m exhausted. Worse of all, I can feel Red’s anxiety from the hallway. I stand outside of the door and press my hand to it and just feel.
Wolves are great with scents. We can smell anything, track anything. We can do whatever we need to when it comes to our noses. One of the reasons hunting in a pack works so great is that as shifters, we essentially smell as one.
But now I’m smelling my mate, and she’s hurting. Her emotions are loud and clear as I touch the door that separates us.
I was out dealing with pack business and she was home alone, by herself, wrestling with her heart. Red and I haven’t talked much about her acclimation to the pack, but I’m a man. I’m not blind. I’m not dumb. I know exactly how much trouble the wolves have been giving her and I intend to stop it. It’s just that running a pack, especially when you’re the new guy, takes time. It takes patience. Unfortunately, it also takes pain.
And tonight it kills me to know that my position as the Alpha has caused my wonderful mate pain. She doesn’t deserve to hurt. Red has seen enough darkness in her life to last her five lifetimes. She doesn’t need to feel like the outcast or the one no one wants.
I wait outside the door for another minute and just think about her. I’m still wearing the stupid robe and I just want to be out of it, want to be with her. I want to go back in time and pretend we’re still in the hot tub, still tangled up in each other, still about to come together the deepest way possible.
I have to go to her.
My heart needs it. My body needs it. I need her. She’s what I need more than anything else.
So I push open the door, not knowing what I might find inside. I know she’s not asleep. Her anxiety is filling the room too strongly for her to be unconscious. Besides, if she was sleeping, her emotions wouldn’t be so strongly negative.
Surely she’d have some good dreams.
I step inside the room and close the door behind me. The entire suite is spotless. I know Red cleans when she’s stressed, so the fact that I can see my reflection in every flat surface is really saying something. I lock the door to our suite and look around quietly, then I move toward Red.
All the lights are off in the suite except for the one beside the bed. She left the night light on for me. That’s Red: always the thoughtful one. Even when she’s hurting or upset, she’s thinking of others.
And I know s
he’s in pain.
I can smell her frustration, her fear, her sadness. Slowly, I drop my robe next to the bed and climb in next to her tiny figure. She’s curled up on her side, facing away from me, and I gently run my hands up and down her back.
“I know you’re awake,” I whisper. “I can hear you heartbeat racing,” I tell her. Red sighs, but doesn’t move, and I know she’s beyond mad.
Probably because of Tessa.
“I love you,” I tell her. “You’re the only one for me. I’m sorry I had to run off, but the pack needed me.” Finally, Red rolls over to look at me, and I keep running my hands up and down her sides.
“What about that…that woman?” She whispers, and I know we’re at the heart of the matter. Red and I haven’t had a lot of time together. She probably feels like I give more attention to other pack members. She probably feels like I’m spending time with everyone but her.
“Tessa?” Red isn’t wearing anything, and I let my hands wander over her front to her sweet, perfect breasts. Pinching a nipple, I feel her soft bud harden. Damn. She’s fucking gorgeous. “She’s nothing to me, Red. Nothing is going on between us, if that’s what you’re wondering.”
“She wasn’t wearing any clothes.” Her voice is a soft whisper.
“I know. That’s part of pack life, honey. You know this. We can’t have clothes on when we shift.”
“I know…” her voice trails off, and I wait for the invisible “but” that is surely going to follow, but it doesn’t.
“Red, I’m going to change some things around here. I’ll start with that.”