Chapter 1
There is nothing so cruel as silence.
Silence has become the sound of my summer … and all the days before since I was found out at the end of my first semester at Hawthorne Academy. I stole a life and paid for it dearly.
Sadie White was everything I ever wanted—rich, powerful, loved—but it couldn’t last. I could only hide behind the face of a dead girl for so long. Teddy Price is nothing more than a charity case, a liar, a fraud.
I’d grown comfortable with that life before. I’d known it was my lot. I was a degenerate, a loser, a light-fingered girl with no future ahead of her. But then that girl dared to dream … and like all dreams, eventually she had to wake.
And the reality that came after was so much worse than before.
My shift at the local movie theatre ended over an hour ago, but I haven’t been able to bring myself to go back to the foster home. This time the silence presses around me in the form of a late Thursday night after a long, thankless shift getting yelled at by blue-haired old ladies complaining that every day should be senior discount day. The only sounds are the buzz of a broken streetlamp that keeps flickering on and off overhead, and the crinkle of the plastic wrapping on the pack of cigarettes in my hand.
The door to the back of the theater opens and light spills out over my figure hunched over the edge of the curb.
“Jesus, Teddy … you scared me.”
Rob’s shadow passes over me as he walks lazily over to the dumpster and throws the bag of two-week-old popcorn and even-older nacho cheese inside. His shadow jumps at the sight of a rat and he quickly shoos it away, much to the rat’s displeasure. It lets us know with a flurry of furious squeaks.
“Careful, Rob,” I say. “He’ll bite you next time.”
“Shit.” His voice is low. “I think he just did.”
Shit. That’s the right word for it … just about sums up my entire life at the moment.
My coworker and cautious compatriot for the summer comes to sit beside me on the curb. He lets out a long, exhausted sigh as he eases himself down beside me and tries to show me the bite mark on his ankle.
I’m not really paying attention. I just keep turning over the pack of cigarettes in my hands as he talks over the crackle of the packaging.
“… that’s crazy, right?”
“Crazy,” I say, absentmindedly.
Rob stops talking and leans forward, forcing himself into my line of vision. He waves one hand in front of my face, and I slap it away.
“Earth to Teddy,” he says. “What’s up with you lately? I mean … you’ve always been a mope, but lately it’s like you’re off on another planet.” He stops and eyes me more closely, trying to get a good look at me in the dim light of the streetlamp overhead. “Are you on meth or something?”
“Ha.” I almost choke out a laugh. That’s not the first time I’ve been accused of being on drugs … but the last time I actually was. Not quite meth caliber, but it did leave me in a hospital bed with my stomach getting pumped. The memory brings with it a stinging sensation at the back of my eyes.
Rob’s hand snakes out and snatches the cigarettes from my hand. He tears off the plastic wrapper, gives the box a good smack, and pulls one out for himself. When he hands the pack back, he leaves his hand on mine for a moment too long.
He’s really not a bad looking guy, but I haven’t been able to bring myself to think of him in that way. Not that he hasn’t made a move. He’s made it very clear that he’s into me, and I’ve done my best to keep him at bay over the last few months.
I jerk my hand away and take out one of my own … only to realize I don’t even have a lighter. I’ve never smoked before. I only bought the pack to celebrate turning eighteen oh … fifteen minutes ago? It’s been a while since I got into any kind of trouble, but somehow buying the cigarettes didn’t bring me quite the thrill I thought it would.