Nick simply shrugged. He didn’t talk about other girls now that he and Jess were back together.
Obviously frustrated, Ryan continued to push. “Just admit that you were attracted to the girl. Can you do that?”
“Why do you even care?” I demanded, doing my best to deflect. “Oh, I get it. You like Claudia, and you’re pissed she likes me.”
Ryan and Nick both started laughing, and Nick said, “Oh yeah, Frank. That’s exactly it.”
Tamping down the urge to throw something heavy at each of their heads, I tried desperately to think of a way to shut them up.
I wasn’t the kind of man who flirted with women, didn’t want to do dirty things to women who weren’t my girlfriend. But, apparently, I did. And I needed my brothers to stop reminding me about what an asshole I had apparently become in the course of one evening. The guilt stampeding through me made me irritable.
“Can you two just shut up for one second?” I snapped as I pulled the final paperwork from the registers and credit card machines.
“We’re not trying to upset you, bro. It’s just that we’ve never seen you go out o
f your way to talk to anyone before. You looked happy.” Nick shrugged one shoulder. “That’s all I want to say.”
“You did look happy,” Ryan said. “It’s okay to be interested in someone, or find a girl attractive. It’s normal.”
I bristled because it wasn’t okay. “Not when you have a girlfriend, it’s not.”
Nick nodded. “Can’t argue with that.”
For once I was thankful for his over-the-top love for Jess. I only wished that my feelings were for the same reasons, but I knew they were more out of obligation and doing the right thing than my actual love for Shelby.
“I’m gonna go update the books,” I said, ending the conversation and heading into the office.
The sound of them talking quietly filtered into the office, and I did my best to tune them out. I left the door open, but hoped they would leave the subject—and me—alone.
• • •
Thankfully, both Ryan and Nick took the hint and laid off me for the rest of the night. They even walked with me out to our cars without saying another word about Claudia, which was both a surprise and a relief.
I’d have another twenty-four hours’ reprieve from them since Thursdays were my days off. We each took one day off during the week, but sometimes even that turned into a workday. It was hard to stay away from the bar when you loved it as much as we all did.
After walking through the door to the condo I shared in Marina del Rey with Shelby, I slipped off my shoes and padded softly down the hallway. She’d be sleeping, and I hated waking her up on a school night. Not that she would have minded.
I flipped on the light in the bathroom, then turned on the shower and peeled off my clothes. I stepped in, closing my eyes and allowing myself to get lost momentarily in the steam, enjoying the hot water pounding on my head and shoulders.
Claudia’s image appeared in my mind, and I shook my head in vain to get rid of it. She smiled, and my dick sprang to attention. It was too late. There would be no getting rid of her now.
It was wrong, but I couldn’t stop. Squeezing some body wash into my hand, I gently lathered it up before rubbing it on the length of my dick. I moved my hand up and down as Claudia’s dark brown eyes appeared in my imagination. My hand worked my flesh harder and faster as I pictured her full lips sucking the head of my cock. I closed my eyes, mentally fisting her jet-black hair in one hand as she took me deep into her mouth, as far as she could take me.
My hand worked faster, my dick nearly ready to explode with Claudia’s name on my lips. Faster. Harder. Claudia.
I came, panting as I slowed to a near stop, draining my dick of every last Claudia-inspired drop. My heart pounding, I watched as the water swept away the evidence of what I’d just done.
And just as quickly, guilt set in.
Fantasizing about Jessica Biel and her lips around my dick was one thing. Celebrities were unattainable and therefore totally acceptable spank-bank material. But thinking about the woman I’d met at the bar tonight, while my girlfriend lay sleeping in our bed in the other room, was not.
What the hell was wrong with me? I stood under the hot spray a little longer, trying to get my head on straight, hoping the water would wash away my unease.
I ran some of Shelby’s girly shampoo through my hair. I liked the way it smelled. And then I used her conditioner because that shit made my hair crazy soft, and the stuff I had for men didn’t do that. What could I say? I liked having soft hair.
After rinsing off, I stepped out of the shower, relieved from my release but still feeling guilty about the cause of it. Wrapping the towel around my waist, I tiptoed out of the bathroom and headed toward our dresser.
Shelby stirred, and I looked at her as she sat up slightly. “Hi.” Her voice was sleepy as she rubbed at her eyes.