She refocused on the pit. “He was one of the best males e’er I have met. Honor and strength were but the start of his many virtues.”
“Oh.” Nate dropped his hold. Took a step back. “I thought . . . well. Maybe you should have stayed with him, then.”
“I was his responsibility, and he protected me better than anyone could have. It made a target out of him and my enemies resolved to kill him. They wanted me, but they knew they had to take him first, as he would have died before he let anything happen unto me.” She closed her eyes and moaned. “And in the end, I was taken just the same . . .”
Something about the way she said it made Nate’s mind go into very bad places.
“Do you know if the male you lost lived?” he asked hoarsely.
Elyn was quiet for a time. “There has been . . . a vast distance between us. So vast.”
“When was the last time you saw him?”
“Centuries ago.”
Nate blinked, dumbfounded. “Um . . . do you want to try to find him?”
Elyn took a deep breath. “I believe I do. But I do not want him e’er to be hurt again on my account. I barely survived the burden of that once, verily I could not live through it again. And yet . . . well, he is all that I have.”
Nate rubbed his hair to make sure none of the profound heartbreak showed on his face. “How can I help? Do you know if he’s here in Caldwell?”
“He is here. That is why I arrived thus.”
“Okay, so we’ve got a variety of ways to find people.” He thought of all the things she was confounded by. “There are databases to search. Places we can go to—or, like, you can go. I mean, I don’t want to get in the way—”
“You cannot help me, Nate.”
Oh, you’re wrong about that, he thought. I’m totally pumped to help you reunite with the male you love. Sign me up.
“Of course I can.”
“It shall be . . . dangerous.”
Nate frowned. “Who is after you?”
“He is dead, the now.”
“So you’re worried about his kin?” When she didn’t answer, Nate felt a warning ripple down his spine. “So his kin lives?”
“He was of fine bloodline.”
“Glymera?” As she nodded, Nate exhaled in relief, even though there was no verified reason to. Yet. “You may not know this, but many of them are dead now.”
“In truth?”
“From the raids a couple of years ago.” He was not surprised when she stared at him blankly. “The lessers infiltrated their homes here in Caldwell. So many were killed. Can you tell me your enemy’s name? We can check and see if his bloodline was affected? We can ask Mrs. Mary’s hellren and he will know—or know how to find that out . . .”
When she once again stared into the impact pit and didn’t answer him, Nate tapped her on the shoulder—and waited until her silver eyes rose to his own.
“I’m not afraid,” he said.
Her response was grim: “You should be.”
Instead of waffling at the warning, Nate felt a certainty in his chest that he had never known before, a surety that was so rock-solid, it was as if the end point of wherever they were going to go had already occurred.
“I am not and I won’t be,” he said in a low voice. “No matter what happens.”
“Nate—”
“You think I haven’t lived through pain? I’ve had surgeries with no anesthesia. Viruses and bacteria forced into my veins. I’ve been examined for the sole purpose of degrading me—and I was a young when all this happened. There are no miseries I haven’t endured, and if I lived through it once, I can do it again.”
Especially for her, and even though there was clearly no future for them. She was in love with her male, and given the hero-material the guy obviously was? Who could compete with that.
After a long moment, Elyn reached up and put her hand on the side of Nate’s face. “You are so brave.”
As the contact of her flesh on his own registered, he froze where he stood . . . and realized, as he stared down into her silver eyes, that he was as the male she loved had been.
Willing to lay his life down for her.
“Your hellren is a very, very lucky male,” Nate said roughly.
Elyn frowned and tilted her head to one side. “Hellren? I am not mated.”
“The male you love, then.”
“No, ’tis not as that. I do love him, but he is my first cousin. He is my family, not my mate.”
As her words sank in, Nate’s soul smiled. He couldn’t describe the feeling in any other way. But he pulled his shit together quick, as Elyn was still looking very serious.
“Then let’s find him,” he said. “Together.”