Relief rolled through me, leaving me feeling empty, cold, and exhausted. I whimpered, but I couldn’t lift my head.
Donovan’s fear beat at me. “Meredith,” he said as his face came into view. He’d shifted. His hands shook as he felt along my sides. I tried to shift, but I didn’t have enough energy. I couldn’t do anything but feel my body as it throbbed in pain. The air was thick with the coppery scent of my blood, and I knew it was bad.
“You’re going to be okay,” Donovan said, but from his nuclear level of panic, I wasn’t so sure he was telling the truth. “Just rest. I’m going to take care of you.”
“What the feck was that?” I heard someone say before I passed out.
Chapter Twenty
I woke up hungry. Starving. Still terrified. I sat up quickly, head spinning.
“Shhh,” Donovan said. “You’re fine. You’re safe.” He pressed a kiss to my forehead, and my heart slowed to a more reasonable pace.
My stomach growled. “But I’m seriously hungry.”
He handed me a plate of sandwiches loaded with way too much meat. I scarfed one down in record time, and reached for another.
“You scared me,” he said as I grabbed my third.
Now that the edge was off the hunger, I could breathe a little easier. I looked around the room to find us alone and in his bed. “How long was I out?”
“A full day. I used a compulsion to keep you asleep. Your sides are healing slowly. The medic used a fey balm on them, so it’s not as bad as human slow, but you’ll need to be cautious another day or two.”
I stretched and my sides screamed, but at least I didn’t feel like I was on fire anymore. It wasn’t so bad.
Donovan handed me a glass of water, and I downed it. Finally feeling a bit more normal, I relaxed back into the bed, I sighed. “What happened?”
“McTavish, the garda from the other night, rammed the fecking beastie with his bloody car. I think you’d hurt him pretty badly, too. His black blood scorched the ground.”
“So he’s gone.”
“For now. But he’s got your scent and he’ll be back. Soon. I’ve been too afraid to leave your side. I didn’t even want to sleep. If he came while you were under my protection… I couldn’t leave you alone, and I don’t trust anyone anymore.” Rage boiled over, flowing through our bond. He took a breath, trying to hide it from me, but it was too late. My mate was way past angry. “But I woke you up because we can’t wait any longer. I’ve called a mandatory pack meeting in a few hours.”
“You did?” Usually pack meetings were only held at the full moon, but sometimes exceptions were made. I’d call a fey beast attacking the pack a big enough problem for an exception. But with Donovan so mad, it wasn’t going to go well.
“I did.” He squeezed my hand. “I’m the Alpha he
re. I’d forgotten what that meant. I felt so guilty about being gone that I shied away from my role. I wanted to weed out whoever was doing this, and save my relationship with the rest of the pack. I’ve never wanted to rule out of fear, but I can. Especially when your life is on the line. I don’t need to waste time sorting out who has the brooch when I can order them to hand it over and make anyone who has a problem with me leave.”
This was a dangerous game to play. He knew it, too. Once you start ruling that way, the trust was broken. A pack never recovered from it. “Are you sure you want to open that can of worms? I’ve seen packs ruled by fear, and they’re cold. It’s not a healthy relationship between Alpha and pack.” Not healthy was the nice way of saying it.
“I’m the Alpha. I can order them to do what I want when there’s need. And ordering the traitor to come forward is a legitimate command.”
“I know, but there’s a reason you haven’t done that already and we both know it. You haven’t been here. Almost the whole pack is against you now, and that’s not entirely their fault. They don’t trust you because you haven’t been here to actually be their Alpha in a very long time. So when you call a mandatory meeting and start throwing around your power, your pack is going to grow more and more resentful until someone else turns traitor, too. It’ll be a dangerous cycle that I don’t think either of us wants to be a part of. If you’re going to do start throwing out commands, then you might as well hand over the pack to the traitor.”
“I don’t care anymore.” He didn’t yell the words, but his tone was vicious. Suddenly I wasn’t worried for myself anymore. The pack was going to pay a steep price if they weren’t careful. “You didn’t see what I saw yesterday. You were running for your life and I couldn’t do anything to stop him. You almost died in front of me, and I couldn’t do anything.” He clenched his jaw shut so tightly that I could see the muscle tightening under his skin. His eyes flashed glowing blue as his wolf rose to the surface. “I tried to play nice. I tried to give my pack the benefit of the doubt, and yes, I felt guilty for not being here more. But not anymore. They can all rot.” He was breathing hard as he tried to control his wolf.
“Donovan,” I said, pleading with him to calm down.
“I can’t lose you.” He said it so softly, my heart broke a little.
“You won’t lose me. I’m not that easy to kill.” Thankfully. But I was worried about Donovan. He wasn’t thinking rationally. His wolf was too close to the surface. In a year, he might regret his actions. Deep down, I was sure he wanted to keep the pack.
But he was about to go down a dark path. The best packs were ones that acted more like a family. Sure, there were always conflicts, but there had to be a mutual respect between pack member and Alpha. Whoever was doing this had already undermined that respect, but Donovan was going to finish the job.
That didn’t mean he wasn’t right. I was terrified. I didn’t want to go up against Bhrunyz again. I almost hadn’t survived the first time, and I wouldn’t be that lucky the second. One way or another, we needed the brooch.
Donovan’s face started changing as his wolf rose even closer. His rage was still on a high burn. I had to change the subject or else he was going to lose it.