“You don’t think it’s a little . . . cheesy?”
She groaned as if I was the stupidest person on earth. “It’s not cheesy if you’re so in love with someone that you can’t even tell it’s raining.”
“I think if you’re out in a rainstorm like that and you can’t tell it’s raining, you need to go to the doctor.”
She shook her head and folded her arms. “Such a cynic.”
We watched the rest of the movie in silence, and I couldn’t tell if she was completely engrossed or smarting at my comment.
“You see,” Autumn said, as the credits started to roll. “Wasn’t it just the greatest?” She grinned as if she was having the best time of her life.
“It’s not as bad as Cats,” I said, hoping that would be enough to placate her.
She rolled her eyes. “It’s a phenomenal movie.”
She was phenomenal.
“Although, second time around it looks like it put your daughter to sleep,” she said.
I glanced down at the comfortable tangle of limbs in my lap. She hadn’t fallen asleep on me like that since she was a baby. It seemed like yesterday and at the same time, so long ago. That first year of Bethany’s life I thought I’d finally got the perfect family and now here I was, a single father.
“It’s late,” I said, looking at the clock. “Just gone eight.”
“Another wild, crazy Friday night.”
For a brief second, I wanted to ask her what her Friday nights were like back in America. Had they been wild and crazy? Is that what she wanted? Parties, being up all night? I stopped myself. I shouldn’t be thinking about what Autumn was looking for. I could deal with right now and not a moment in the future.
We’d not talked about the fact that we’d had sex. I’d been tied up at work and we’d barely seen each other. And I didn’t know what to say. For so long I’d kept that side of myself locked away, but Autumn had come along and bulldozed her way into my life. Into my heart. And although I had a thousand reasons why I shouldn’t touch her again, whenever I was near her, none of them seemed to matter.
I reached out with one hand and cupped Autumn’s face. “You look beautiful,” I said, stroking my thumb against her cheek. She slid her hand over mine.
“It was nice that you stayed. Thank you.”
“How could I say no?” I asked, wondering if I could dive into those deep brown eyes of hers.
I removed my hand. “I need to get this one to bed,” I said as I stood. “Can you bring Bear Bear?”
“Sure,” she said, scooping the toy up and following me as I headed upstairs.
I laid Bethany in bed and pressed a kiss against her cheek, tucking Bear Bear under her arm. God, I loved her so much. All the pain with Penelope was worth it to have such a miracle in my life every day. I was so lucky.
“She’s beautiful,” Autumn said from behind me. I turned and headed over to where she was leaning against the doorframe.
“She certainly is. Thank you for taking such good care of her.”
“I have the best job ever—eating popcorn and watching musicals with the cutest kid alive.”
I chuckled as we shifted and I closed Bethany’s bedroom door.
“I’ve been thinking about the other night,” I said, not quite sure what was going to come next.
Her shoulders slouched and she groaned like it was the worst possible thing I could have said. “Don’t say it, Gabriel.”
“I haven’t said anything,” I replied, confused.
She turned her back and headed down the landing to the stairs.
What was happening? “Autumn,” I said, catching up with her and putting my hand on her arm. “What did I say?”
She stopped and turned and she looked so sad, so disappointed. It felt like a blow to my chest that I might have caused that. “It’s not what you said, it was what you were about to say. You were going to say how it wouldn’t happen again and it’s not right and—”
I pulled her toward me, pushed my hand into her hair, and dragged my lips against hers. I delved into her mouth with my tongue, my skin buzzed at her sweetness, my chest lifted at the feel of her. She just felt so right.
She pulled away slightly. “Did I jump to conclusions?”
I wasn’t sure why a woman who seemed to live on life’s bright side would expect me to go back on my word. Her assumption hinted that perhaps the woman who was all sunshine was in fact constantly expecting rain. “You don’t need to doubt me,” I said. “I was just going to suggest you might not want to broadcast what happened between us. Until we have a chance to figure it out.” I didn’t know what was happening or how I felt, and I wasn’t going to lie to Autumn and pretend I did. But I also knew some kind of watershed had been crossed and there was no going back. More than that, I didn’t want to go back.