He shoved the key in the ignition. “We’re alone now. Are you going to talk to me?”
“About what?” She blinked at him wide-eyed, pretending confusion. But she was quaking with terror. She was terrible at keeping secrets, especially from people she loved. Not telling Zy what was going on in her life was damn near killing her.
“Whatever’s crawled up your ass in the last twenty-four hours—”
“I-I had a headache, and I still don’t feel good.”
Zy raised a brow at her.
He clearly didn’t believe her. “And you don’t want to tell me what I’ve done that made you push me away?”
“It’s not like that.” But that must be what it felt like to him.
And his acidic smile said so.
“You still don’t want to talk? Fine. Let’s just get this done.” He tore out of the parking lot and shot down the road.
The silence between them felt oppressive.
“Zy…” she ventured, then set a hand on his taut arm. Tessa remembered that arm around her, his hands skimming her body as his lips worked up her neck to cover her own before he sank deep and gave her scream-worthy pleasure.
“What?”
She didn’t want to upset him and she didn’t want to lose him. Maybe it was time to take a different approach…
“Please try to understand. It’s not you. There’s…something going on.”
“I figured. Tell me what. We’ll fix it.”
Tessa shook her head. “This is something I have to work out. I know you want to help me, but—”
“Hell yeah, I do. I love you. It’s in my DNA to help you.”
Of course. He was a problem solver and a doer, but… “I have to do this alone.”
Zy sighed as he rolled to a stoplight and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Why?”
“It’s…” She tried to think of an excuse he’d believe. “It’s in my head. I’ve just been through a lot and…I want to be really sure I’m ready.”
“You said you were the night we made love. What made you change your mind?”
Good question. If Hallie hadn’t been taken and she didn’t have to worry about her daughter’s abductor watching her, Tessa would be in Zy’s arms, eager for the moment they could be alone again.
But that wasn’t her reality.
So she grasped at the first answer she could think of. “What happened between us that night was huge. It scared me. I’ve never felt anything like that.”
That wasn’t really a lie. Zy had knocked her off her feet and swept into her heart. The whole night had dazzled her senses so much it actually boggled her mind. The thought that she might lose him for good worried her. But she was terrified for Hallie.
“So what are you saying? You need more time to adjust?”
“Yes. A few days.” She hoped the abductor would be done with her and release Hallie by then. “I just need to get my head screwed on straight.”
Zy took her words in but didn’t speak. Tessa wished he’d say something.
Instead, he bolted across the intersection as the light turned green. Three silent minutes later, they reached the store. She would kill to know what he was thinking.
He parked the car and yanked the keys from the ignition—and she felt his frustration rise between them.
Tessa couldn’t help herself. She slipped her hand in his and willed him to look her way. “Zy, I care about you and—”
“Do you?”
“Yes.” That he might believe otherwise had tears stinging her eyes. “Please give me a little time. Everything now…it’s a lot to wrap my head around.”
“And you’ve got another responsibility to think about.” He sighed. “I know.”
But he didn’t seem happy.
Before she could say anything else, he launched himself out of the car and headed toward the baby store, locking the sedan with her fob when he turned to ensure she was out and following.
Normally, he’d get her door, help her up, be the gentleman. His sudden distance told her he was disheartened and exasperated. How was she going to repair it when she couldn’t tell him the truth?
Inside the store, he pulled up a list from a text message. She tried not to remember the countless times she and Hallie had been here. She tried not to lose her mind missing and worrying about her daughter so horribly it was a physical ache.
She failed miserably.
Fifteen minutes later, Tessa was hanging by a thread. They had acquired all of the things Valeria asked for. Zy was quiet as they checked out. He was silent as he carried the bags. He was pensive as he loaded the trunk, slid into the driver’s seat, and started the car.
He backed out of the spot so quickly it was almost reckless, but his moves were so controlled she’d swear he was a stunt driver.
“So you’re not moving in with me anytime soon, I take it?” he demanded.
Tessa really wanted to. She’d tried to be cautious and measured when he’d first asked, but she already knew he was the perfect man for her and would be an amazing father for Hallie. He’d give her more children. He’d provide safety. He’d give her love.