“So that’s why you’re doubly hormonal?” Maddie cracks. I nudge my shoulder with hers and hiss.
“Don’t worry, baby,” Sophie coos, patting one side of my belly. “I’ll be your favorite auntie who will love you no matter what.”
“Hey, no way!” Maddie flicks Sophie’s hand, and soon they’re fighting over my unborn child.
“You two are insane.” I laugh, pushing them both away. “Neither of you will be the favorite if you don’t help me name her!”
We pick up the books off the coffee table and start flipping through them. Hunter walks into the living room and tells us he’s ordering pizza, which only makes my stomach growl in anticipation. Grabbing his bag, he brings it to the kitchen table and pulls out his laptop for a makeshift desk. He’s been working so damn hard lately with his project, which I find really admirable considering how much he’s already doing for me.
“How about you make a list for boy names and girl names you like and then you can start narrowing from there?” Maddie suggests.
“That’s a good idea,” Sophie adds. “We’ve got a lot of books to go through.” She glances at the stack I ordered. I might’ve gone a tad overboard. I won’t find out the gender until my August ultrasound appointment, which is exciting, but I won’t care either way. This baby is a miracle.
“If it’s a boy, I’m leaning toward Brandon Jude Locke, Jr,” I say, a smile touching my lips.
“That’s perfect,” Hunter says from the kitchen table, and Sophie and Maddie agree in unison.
I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and each time it crosses my mind, my heart lurches forward. Though Brandon’s not here, I’ll make sure he continues to live through our memories together. The baby will know how great of a man their daddy was. Before I get too sucked into my head and emotional, I continue.
“So maybe we should just look at girl names then? Hell, that just cut our job in half.” I hand Sophie a book as thick as a dictionary. I flip open the one in my lap and see an overwhelming number of names listed in alphabetical order. Most I’ve never heard of like Athwenna and Aoife.
“I, at least, want people to be able to say and spell her name correctly,” I say aloud after reading words I don’t even know how to pronounce.
Maddie and Sophie throw out different cute names, and I write a few down in my phone app but others I pass on. The pizza eventually arrives, and we set the books aside while we move to the kitchen table. As we eat, making small talk, Maddie eventually brings up our parents.
“Do you know when you’re going to tell them?” She looks at me just as Sophie did last week when she asked. Time will eventually run out, we all know it, and I have to decide soon.
“Well, I’ve been thinking about it a lot actually. Every time I get in the shower, I see how my tummy grows, and I won’t be able to cover it up much longer.” Even though we live in different states, they won’t be happy I hid it from them and didn’t tell them right away. The longer I wait, the more disappointed they’ll be.
Hunter gives me a sympathetic smile but doesn’t interrupt.
“I’ve decided to keep my Fourth of July trip and tell them in person and just get it over with. I hope they’re not heartless enough to throw me out on my pregnant ass, not after everything I’ve been through this year, but it wouldn’t surprise me.” It hurts my hormonal heart to think about it, but I know it’s something that has to be done. “Plus, it’s too easy to hang up on someone if it’s done over the phone. At least then they’ll have to dismiss me and the baby to my face,” I continue.
Once I tell my parents, the entire congregation of the church will know my business in less than a day. I can only imagine the prayer lists I’ll be added to.
“This isn’t going to be good, Lennon. Are you crazy?” Maddie asks.
“I know they’ll be highly disappointed and won’t hold back what they think about any of this, but I’m their daughter. They love me unconditionally, right? They taught us compassion all of our lives.” I pause. “Honestly, I’m really fucking scared of their reaction because I don’t want to lose them.” I look at Maddie and Sophie with sad eyes.
“I’m going with you,” Hunter speaks up, his eyes not leaving mine. “I’m not going to let you go through that alone. I know I’ve already offered, but I’m not giving you a choice anymore. I want to be there for you,” he states matter-of-factly, crossing his arms over his broad chest and holding his stance as if he’s not giving me any room to argue this.