Cole ground his teeth together. But he couldn’t blame Joel for being cautious. And, truthfully, part of him was glad for it. It meant they were protected. That they weren’t alone.
“But that doesn’t mean they can’t tell you,” Joel added.
Something lit up inside him at the thought. There was a calculating look on Joel’s face. “Why were you trying to find them?”
“I wanted to check on them. To make sure they were all right.” Something he should have been doing all along. He should never have let them out of his sight. “I thought if they were doing well, then I’d let things be.”
“And if they weren’t doing all right?”
“Then I’d do whatever I needed to in order to help them.”
Joel studied him for a long moment. “You still care about them?”
“More than I’ve ever cared about anyone.”
“Yet, you threw them away.”
“There were reasons for that.” Reasons he needed to explain to them. If they’d listen to him.
Joel sighed. “I’m not sure that you being here is going to help them.”
“I don’t want to upset them. But maybe listening to what I have to tell them will help. Will give them closure. Maybe they can forgive me.”
“I don’t know if you’ll ever get forgiveness, Cole. I know it’s been a while, but some wounds go deep. They might not be willing to even listen to an apology at this stage.”
“I know. Are they involved with anyone else?”
Joel gave him an unreadable look. “That the only reason you want to apologize? To get them back into your bed?”
“No,” Cole gritted out. “But I don’t . . . I don’t want to interfere in their lives. If they’re happy, if they have someone else, if me being around would make things worse—”
“You saw them, Cole. Even if it was just for a few minutes. You tell me, do you think they’re fucking happy? Do they look like they have someone to take care of them?”
“No. But Julian—”
“Isn’t doing well. And I suspect Keira is doing even worse than he is, she just hides it better.”
“Is he . . . isn’t he her Dom?”
Joel sighed. “I guess the short answer is yes. The long answer is that it’s fucking complicated. They’re messed up and they need someone to help them.”
Cole straightened in his seat.
“Not you,” Joel told him.
Cole scowled. “What the fuck?”
“I’m hoping to find them a Dom to aid them, if they’ll accept his command. I’m not sure it will work, that Julian will let someone else take charge. Keira will do whatever Julian wants.”
That didn’t sound right. Keira was a sub, but she knew her own mind. If anything, he’d have said Julian let her have her way too often. She could have done with a firmer hand.
But, before he could question Joel, he was moving on. “But I have to try, because they need help.”
“I’ve trained as a Dom.”
Joel’s eyebrows rose. “Always wondered if
you’d figure that out.”