“How long do the doctors say you have?” Another tear spilled down my cheek, and I brushed it away.
His hands clenched into fists. “They gave me a year without the treatments. Maybe more. Maybe less. It just…depends. But they couldn’t offer me much longer even if I did more chemo. The scans I’ve had since show that it’s more aggressive this time.”
“How have I missed you being unwell?” I muttered, hating that I hadn’t seen any sign that he was in pain.
“My symptoms are manageable right now. Just headaches throughout the day. But I have a prescription for pain management when they get to be too bad.” He grimaced. “Thankfully, they have been few and far between, but when they do happen…”
“Our all-day nap sessions,” I finished for him, remembering the days when he couldn’t seem to keep his eyes open and we would just nap on the couch with Krush at our feet.
“Yes,” he choked out.
I scrubbed my hands over my eyes and tried to collect my thoughts. This was a lot to take in all at once. Going from being so happy I thought I might float with joy, to feeling like the world was crumbling at my feet was devastating on the heart. I didn’t even know if it was beating right then, but I had to figure this out.
I knew I was in shock, that my head and my heart weren’t really comprehending everything he was saying. If they were, I would be screaming at the injustice. We just got engaged. We were starting a family of our own. Our life together couldn’t be cut short just because of that damn dreaded “C” word.
Remington had become the other half of my heart. I felt him ingrained within my soul just as deep as Luca had ever been—maybe even more so. Ever since that first night in London, Remington had been fulfilling every dream I’d ever had. My happiness had known no bounds where this man was concerned, and now he was telling me that we couldn’t have this forever?
I didn’t want to believe him, but the devastation I read on his face told me it was true.
“Were you ever going to tell me?” I demanded as I fought back a sob.
“I’ve thought about telling you every day, but each time I would get the courage to confess, all I could picture was you walking out the door.” He stood and took a few steps toward me. “I just wanted us to be happy for as long as we could before I had to break your heart.”
“Every time you would say I was your forever, you…” My legs gave out on me, and I started to fall. But before I could hit the floor, he caught me against him and lifted me into his arms.
Carrying me to the couch, he sat with me in his lap, and I buried my face in his chest.
“You really did mean your forever,” I sobbed.
“Please don’t hate me,” he begged, kissing the top of my head while rubbing his hands up and down my back. “I know I’m selfish and unworthy of you. But please don’t leave me.”
I lifted my head, and I couldn’t help glaring at him. “You think I could so easily walk away from you? We’re getting married, you big dummy. That means through sickness and health. My love doesn’t stop just because you are sick!”
“I’m not just sick,” he said with a grim twist of his lips as he used the pad of his thumb to wipe away my tears. “I’m dying, Violet.”
“Everyone is dying. Each day is one more closer to the ultimate endgame, Remi.” I pressed my head to his shoulder and released a heavy sigh. “You’re just…getting there faster.”
A strangled laugh filled my ears. “I guess that’s one way of looking at it.”
Angrily, I shoved at his shoulder and pointed my finger in his face. “No more keeping things from me. I mean it. That shit isn’t going to fly with me anymore. I want to know everything.”
He inclined his head. “So, is this where I should tell you the papers I need you to sign are for everything I own to become yours when I pass?”
“I don’t want it.” I didn’t want his money or houses or cars or the damn jet or the fucking yacht. I only wanted him, us, our baby.
Couldn’t we trade all those billions for a lifetime of being happy together? Wasn’t money supposed to buy anything?
Why the hell couldn’t it give us more time?
“Too bad. It’s going to be yours.” He kissed away the rest of my tears, then moved down to nip at my neck. Even as distraught as I was, I was unable to fight the shiver of pleasure, and I melted into him. “But if we’re going to have a baby, you’ll have to share it with him or her.”
“Oh, so now you believe there’s a baby, huh?” I snipped, crossing my arms over
my chest.
“I’m hoping anyway.” He gave me a sad smile. “I’m sorry, my love. This should have been a joyous moment for both of us, and I ruined it.”
Unable to keep myself from touching him, I stroked my fingertips over his jaw. “It was definitely life-altering, that’s for sure.”