“I mean it can’t happen again at all,” she snapped. “Ever.”
Not even in his worst nightmare would it never happen again. Kell stared back at her, remembering the heat of her pussy through two layers of clothes, the hunger in her searching lips and how her hips had moved, grinding onto his cock with an inborn sensuality that still had him gritting his teeth in hunger.
“You’re fooling yourself, Emily,” he said softly. “I didn’t take you for a woman who denied the obvious. It’s going to happen again. And often.
Don’t doubt that.”
She licked her lips; the pouty curves were swollen from his kiss, but restrained. Tight with the effort it cost her to control the need rising inside her.
“I won’t let myself have you, Kell. Don’t fool yourself. That.” She waved to the couch again. “That was a temporary lapse in judgment. Nothing more.”
“Why won’t you let yourself, sugar?” he asked her gently, seeing the shadows in her eyes, the sharp pain that seeped into the blue depths.
Her lips twisted cynically. “I already have a father who feels the need to control me, Kell. I don’t need a lover doing the same thing. And I sure as hell don’t intend to hand my father the son-in-law he’s dreamed of by giving him the opportunity to force you into a marriage neither of us wants. So give it up. Find someone to babysit and go out and get your piece before coming back to work. Just like the others did. Don’t worry, I won’t tell on you. Unlike my bodyguards, I know how to keep my damned mouth shut.”
Hell, it was no wonder she hadn’t let any of those morons her father hired touch her. Not that he completely blamed the bodyguards, living in the same house with her, knowing she wanted nothing to do with them, that would suck. They would have to find relief somewhere.
“And what did you do, Emily?” he asked her then. “When you needed to be touched? Held?”
“Why, Kell, I just reminded myself of the price.” She sneered. “My freedom. Once I put it all in perspective, it was really quite easy. I’ve lost enough independence since I reached the age where my father could safely marry me off. I’d really rather not lose any more if it’s all the same to you.”
“And how would you lose that independence with me, Emily?”
Bleak acceptance filled her gaze at that point.
“I’m not on birth control, Kell. I can’t take it. The pill, the shot, the IUD, the inserts. I’ve tried them all. My body rejects them all. That leaves a condom. Condoms break. Babies are made, and once they are, if you don’t marry me my father will destroy you. Careerwise, lifewise, personally, and professionally. And I won’t marry you. Because I know the type of man you are.”
“Do you?”
Her laughter was mocking. “Your wife will stay at home, have your babies, and toe the line while you’re gone. You’ll play your war games with your buddies, watch ballgames with them when they’re home, and screw your wife when you have nothing better to do. Thank you, but no thank you. Being a virgin for life sounds a hell of a lot sweeter than marrying a big, tough, Alpha asshole with more damned testosterone than common sense when it comes to his wife.”
Kell listened to her voice rise with each sentence. When she finished, her teeth snapped together, her lips compressed, and she turned her back as her fingers raked furiously through her hair.
“Is that what your father did?”
Her laughter was bitter now. “Mom was leaving him when she was killed. Because he loved her too much, she said. I didn’t understand that. Daddy loved us. What was there to hate about that?” She shook her head as Kell felt the helplessness that flowed from her. “After she died, he was devoted to me. He taught me how to fight, how to hunt and track, and he was teaching me to mountain climb. Then I turned eighteen.”
“And he decided to marry you off,” Kell finished.
She turned back to him. “As you well know. Hell, you’ve been around long enough to know about the fights we’ve had over it.”
“So why didn’t you sleep with one of the boys from college? Hell, I think I would have halfway understood if you picked a married man. Why stay a virgin, Emily?”
Her expression sobered. There was no mockery, no cynicism. “Because it wouldn’t be enough,” she whispered sadly. “You miss what you’ve had worse than you miss what you haven’t. I don’t want to miss more than I already do.”
“Why, Emily?” he ground out again. “If you’ve gone to these extremes to keep your father from winning, despite your love for him, then why give up? Why not live as you want to and tell him to go to hell?”
“Because he didn’t tell me to go to hell,” she whispered miserably. “I can’t hurt my father like that, Kell. I love him too much.”
“It seems to me, Emily, that he doesn’t care to hurt you or to use that too developed sense of responsibility you have against you,” he pointed out. “What you’re forgetting, though, is the fact that you have a responsibility to yourself as well. Now, I will end up in a bed with you. I’ll protect you as best I can, but if the rubber breaks and you end up pregnant, your father won’t have to threaten me to take care of my child or my woman. I’m not a kid anymore. I know how it’s done now. I guess it’s just up to you to decide if you’re going to take what you want, or if you’re going to stay daddy’s little girl forever.”
Seven
HE WAS GOING TO END up falling in love with her.
Kell accepted the truth about the time they were going through the produce department and he caught Emily eyeing the cucumbers just a little too intently before trying to sneak a glance at his thighs.
Comparing size. The little vixen was trying to figure out dimensions by comparing the bulge with the cucumbers.