“Fuck the contract. Tessa has been through enough. She doesn’t need you going through her, too.”
Jesus, he didn’t know which tactic to take. Try to pretend he was protecting her like a big brother? Or admit he was developing feelings and wanted her as a lover?
The colonel pointed a finger in his face. “Whatever you’re cooking up in that scheming head of yours, don’t bother. I saw the way she looked at you, like a savior who made her breathless. And you…” He gave a dirty laugh. “When you looked at her, I saw a bad hunger in your eyes. So don’t even try to bullshit me.”
Zy shut his mouth and nodded.
“You’ve worked for me for less than three weeks, and the team survived without you just fine in the past. So if you don’t keep your tongue in your mouth and your dick in your pants, you’ll find yourself out. Are we clear?”
“Crystal. Like I said, nothing has happened and nothing will.”
“If you both want to stay employed, keep it that way.”
Time showed its perverse nature that weekend. The more Tessa dreaded Zy leaving on Sunday, the faster it seemed to pass.
The rest of Friday night, he seemed quiet, almost withdrawn. Same with Saturday. In fact, as soon as he found out Cash had actually been arrested and would be in jail until a bail hearing on Monday, he disappeared with Trees for a few hours to find a place of his own.
Tessa tried not to be upset. After all, he had to live somewhere once he left her place tomorrow. And he owed her nothing, especially since he’d already given her more of his time than she had a right to ask for. But even when he returned, it felt as if he already had one foot out the door.
Then Sunday afternoon while Hallie slept, he appeared in the hallway with his duffel and a guarded expression. Her heart dropped.
“I should go.”
He should, but the finality in his voice jolted her with panic as she headed him off in the kitchen. “Stay for dinner. It’s the least I can do to thank you. I’m making a roast and—”
“Thanks, but I found an apartment yesterday. I’d like to get my things out of storage and into the unit before I lose daylight. Trees, Cutter, and Josiah all said they’d help.” He glanced at his phone. “So I’m going to meet them in thirty minutes.”
This was the first she was hearing of his plans. Why hadn’t he told her yesterday? Or this morning? It wasn’t logical, but it hurt that he hadn’t. And that was her cue that she’d gotten too attached. Whatever he’d thought of her when he’d stared a bit too long, whatever he’d been feeling when he’d pleasured himself in her shower…he’d moved past it. Of course he had. Her life was complicated. She had responsibilities he wouldn’t want to shoulder full-time.
True…but it hurt like hell.
She needed to let him go with a wave and a smile. After all, Cash had crashed through her life like a vandal, making a mess of everything he’d touched and leaving her to clean up. But Zy had crept in like an assassin. He wouldn’t just leave her to pick up the pieces. If she let him, he would stab her in the heart and leave her to bleed out.
“Well, thank you for everything. I appreciate all you did for Hallie and me.” She tried to smile. “If you ever need a too-short sofa to sleep on or want another spoonful of homemade mashed potatoes, let me know. It’s the least I can do.”
Zy didn’t say anything for a long moment. He just stared at her as if he had something to say.
“Fuck it.” He dropped his duffel on the tile, then prowled in her direction, closer and closer. Instinctively, she retreated until she backed into the island. Then he planted his hands on either side of her hips and stared—into her eyes, then down at her mouth. He looked as if he was fighting himself.
From kissing her? Her heart skipped.
“Tessa…”
“Zy,” she answered automatically, her whisper sounding like a secret only they shared.
“Baby, you have to stop looking at me like that.”
“Like what?” But she knew. Even if it was stupid, his nearness made her feel electric. She ached for him so badly she throbbed.
“Like you want me to peel off your clothes and take you to bed as much as I’m dying to.” He shook his head. “Trying to pretend I don’t feel it when I do, that you don’t feel it when I know better… It isn’t working.”
Perversely, knowing he hadn’t mentally moved on made her feel better. Because what she felt wasn’t unrequited? Because she wasn’t the only one who would suffer this separation?
She closed her eyes. “I’m sorry.”