“After she died, I tried to leave twice. Both times, he almost killed me. I stopped trying to leave when my brothers came looking for me. Stark let them leave alive, but he told me that if they came back he would kill them. He gave me his word he would leave them alone if they stayed away.
“I called them on the phone they gave me and told them I wasn’t interested in getting the family back together.” Bliss gave a bitter smile. “I could tell they were relieved. I didn’t look my best when they came in, could see they were disgusted. They thought I was just like our mother. And I was by that time. I didn’t care who or how I did the men in the club. I was just trying to survive one day after another.
“You want to know something weird?” she continued.
“What?” Drake croaked out.
“I don’t know why I tried so hard to survive. I thought I deserved everything they did to me because I must have been bad. I hadn’t taken good enough care of my mother, couldn’t make her love me more than the drugs, hadn’t been smart in school.
“If I made it through the day without getting smacked around, I thought it was a good day. The nights were the worst, though. That’s when I had to sleep with that disgusting bastard. He’s evil. The club used to joke that Stark always escaped being killed because the devil didn’t even want him.
“I would still be there if it wasn’t for The Last Riders. The Devil’s Rejects bit off more than they could chew when they started a war with them. They stole some of the men’s bikes and a woman member when the club was out on a ride. Viper retaliated by striking back at their clubhouse. The difference was The Last Riders attacked while the club was there.
“I still remember that night. I watched as every man in the club was killed or hurt badly enough to wish he was dead. The only reason Stark lived was because Viper wanted to humiliate him for not being a strong enough leader to protect his men.
“Viper offered the women a place with The Last Riders if they wanted to leave. Five of us chose to go. Viper helped us back on our feet. None of us had willingly wanted to be with the Devil’s Rejects. Three of them found jobs and moved on. A fourth ended up marrying one of Viper’s men, and they left the club.”
“You stayed.”
“I stayed. I knew Stark would find me—he had before. Viper offered to help me find a place, to help me find my brothers.” Bliss’s eyes darkened in pain. “Viper found out Stark hadn’t kept his word to me. He had killed them a month after I had called them. He wanted to make sure I wouldn’t try to run to them.
“Stark was never a man of his word, but Viper was. He asked me if I wanted him to find me another place to live, but I told him no. I liked The Last Riders. I felt safe. I wasn’t ready to give that up.
“He wouldn’t let the men touch me for a year, said I needed time to get my head on straight and figure out what I wanted.”
“Which was?”
“To be one of them. They’re loyal and fierce, Drake. They would die to protect each other. I wanted that for myself.”
“Bliss…”
“A woman can become a member by fucking or making six out of the eight original members come. One night, I walked up to Rider and sucked his dick off in front of Train. They were my first two votes.”
“Sweet Bliss…”
“Please, don’t call me that… Please, don’t. I’m not sweet. I don’t know how to be. That’s why they threw me out. I was too mean to the women. I couldn’t be friendly with the women who were taking the men away from the club.
“If they didn’t want to have sex with me, then why would they protect me? I needed their protection. I still do. That’s why I wanted Shade so badly. If I could have made him care, he would have made sure Stark never came near me again. I can’t go back to the Devil’s Rejects.”
“You don’t need The Last Riders anymore, especially not Shade.” Drake forced her to turn around and face him. “I can protect you. Trust me.”
He would never understand what he was asking of her. He wanted her to stand still with the train roaring right at her and not try to jump out of the way. She had trusted Stark twice, and he had nearly destroyed her. She had trusted she would always be a Last Rider, and that had ended.
Bliss laid her head on his chest. “I’ll try.”