“Lexie,” I say. “Please, just let me explain. I want to talk about this. It’s not how you think, not really.”
“Oh?” she asks. “So, you didn’t sleep with my best friend without telling me about it?”
“No, actually,” I say, glancing back at Candy. “I didn’t. We were taking it a little slower than that.”
“So, you just made out and groped her in some seedy club?” Lexie snaps. “That’s so much better. I can rest easy now that I know.”
“There’s no need to be like that,” I admonish her quietly, falling back into parenting mode. It’s an automatic thing, not something I can think about logically, whether I should be addressing her attitude at a time like this or not.
“Isn’t there?” Lexie asks me. She gives me one long, hard look, and nothing else before the moment is gone and she breaks eye contact with a coldly furious turn of her shoulders. Then she’s gone in a flash, ducking into the car and slamming the door closed behind her.
“Lexie, no,” I say, hammering on the passenger side window. “Stop. Don’t just drive away – let me talk to you.”
But it’s no use. The car’s engine starts, and I have to jump away before she runs over my foot. I watch helplessly as my daughter drives away, out of my reach, leaving me staring at the back window of her car. I have no idea where she’s going, and with traffic rushing by outside of campus, she’ll be lost to me before I have the chance to get into my car.
“I’m sorry,” Candy says, wiping her face again. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”
“It’s not your fault,” I tell her. “This is his fault. His plan. And it’s my fault, too. I shouldn’t have imagined that we could keep it secret, not for long. I’m sorry you had to get into a fight with Lexie.”
Candy nods sadly. When I step closer towards her, she takes a step away, leaving me lost for words.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea,” she says.
“What isn’t?” I ask, shaking my head. I don’t want to hear it, not if it’s what I think she’s going to say. We’ve come through the worst part already. This can’t be it.
“Us,” she says, backing off another couple of steps. “Please, Finn. I’m sorry. I wanted it to work, too, but… we can’t do this. It’s better if we’re not together.”
“No,” I say. “No, it isn’t. Candy…”
“It’s better for now,” she says, which gives me at least a tiny bit of hope that ‘for now’ doesn’t mean forever – but before I can get a chance to clarify she turns and leaves until I’m standing there alone in the parking lot.
Two halves of my heart – and now both of them are gone.
I get in my car to drive home, beaten but not defeated. This isn’t the end – not for either of them. I’ll find a way to make this right.
I just have to figure out how.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Candy
I sit in my room, looking at the empty space where Alex usually sits at her desk to study. She’s not here, and I have a feeling that she won’t be coming back tonight, either. I don’t know where she will go. She can’t go home without seeing her Dad, can’t come back here without seeing me. I hope she finds somewhere safe, maybe with another friend.
And that leaves me alone. I knew I was risking both a relationship with Finn and my best friend when I agreed to date him yesterday – but I never imagined that it would happen so quickly. I could just carry on with Finn now, saying that the damage is done and it’s too late, so we might as well continue. But it doesn’t feel right. We hurt Alex, and she should be the most important person in Finn’s life.
I have to let them heal their relationship, instead of being selfish about it.
I lay on my bed and close my eyes, hugging a pillow against my chest. Even though I think I made the right decision, it hurts a lot. I wanted to be with him. I wanted to try and make this work, even if it meant keeping everything quiet for a few months. I thought we could do it.
He’s my dream man. I never even thought he would look at me, and when he did, I certainly didn’t think he would be serious about dating. When he was, it was a dream come true. But now that dream is completely shattered. There’s no way he will want to be with me, now knowing that the cost is not having contact with his daughter.
If he can even get that back in the first place, he’s not going to want to risk it again.