“And you’re lucky you do too. Otherwise, I’d kill you for loving mine,” Nixon said so casually I had to flip him off.
I meant it.
My wife was… everything Trace wasn’t.
She was perfect.
Mine.
But that didn’t mean Trace wasn’t still one of my dearest friends that I just so happened to kiss back in college.
Someone cleared his throat, and then Sergio spoke. “I would have done anything and everything for Andi—in the moment.” He drew a deep breath and released it, then added, “But in that moment, would it have been fair in our relationship? There must always be a balance, Chase, especially in this lifestyle.”
I nodded, crossed my arms.
Continued looking out at the snow.
“Brother,” came Andrei’s voice. “At the risk of getting the shit beat out of me… you can’t measure love. It simply has no scale, so every situation is going to be different depending on the ask.”
I hung my head. “And if… the ask was death? Then what?”
The room was silent.
The clock ticked in the distance.
I squeezed my eyes shut as I felt the room fill with tension, and then Phoenix’s voice… “What did you do?”
My truth.
My life.
My son.
With a shaking voice, I whispered, “I killed her.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
“What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us. What we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal.” —Albert Pike
Ash
One Week Later
“Wake up!” My dad’s voice was tense, worried—afraid.
I jerked awake and stared into his icy blue eyes. I saw nothing but terror there, nothing but uncertainty. “What’s wrong?”
“Emergency meeting. Now.”
“With who?”
He swallowed and looked away with shaking hands. “Everyone.”
“All the bosses?” I didn’t mean to question, but it was rare to have actual meetings. Dinners were one thing, but meetings? A commission?
“Yes.” Dad tossed me a pair of jeans from the floor and said, “Get ready.”
“For what?”
He stopped at the door and whispered, “War.”
I immediately thought of Annie as I hurried to brush my teeth, then threw on a beanie, dressed in dark jeans and a gray T-shirt, and stumbled out of the guest house.
By the time I arrived at the kitchen, it wasn’t just all the bosses who were present, but all the cousins—even the younger ones.
“What the hell is going on?” I asked in a cold voice. “Because right now, it looks like we’re planning another fucking funeral.” Where was Annie?
My stomach dropped.
My heart stopped beating.
Eyes furiously darting around the room until I saw her holding Kartini’s hand.
Kartini?
I mean, she was young, only seventeen but, why Kartini?
And that was when I saw it.
The dust on some.
Dark smudges on others.
Blood on a few.
What the hell had happened to my family? And why was Kartini shaking?
“Someone. Talk. Now.” I was losing control fast. Something snapped within me, imagining the smudges on Annie, the fear in her eyes.
Did Annie have blood on her?
What the hell would cause everyone to look this morose?
“Someone…” Tex shuddered and glanced at King, who had smudges of burnt something across his face. His eyes were rimmed with red, his jaw locked like he was afraid if he opened it, he’d scream. “Someone sent one of those shitty white horse bombs to every single one of the cousins. Most of them knew what to do, but they were on timers, so they went off anyway… Had they not been warned because of the one at Ash’s …”
I clenched my fists. “So who do we go after? Who are we killing?”
I was ready.
Adrenaline surged through my body.
Nobody threatened what was mine.
Nobody.
“That’s just it.” Tex sighed and ran a shaky hand through his copper and brown hair. “We still have no intel; it’s like they’re off-grid.”
Tank chose the worst timing ever as he let himself into the house, the door nearly coming off its hinges. “Is everyone okay?”
His eyes darted around the room, finally settling on Kartini as he seemed to sigh in relief.
I wanted to shout, “with no thanks to you! “But I kept silent.
I watched.
Waited.
“Yes,” Dad finally said. “We’re just trying to figure out what’s the safest route…”
Tank immediately jumped into action. “I can get agents to surround your property; you know they want the bigger fish, the violent squirmy one.” He pulled out his phone. “Just give me a minute.”
“No.” The voice was feminine. Familiar. Shocked, I watched as Annie made her way into our circle as if she’d been a part of this life for an eternity. “You can’t involve them.”
“Annie.” Tank’s face fell as his eyes softened toward her sealing his fate of getting punched in the face later. “This isn’t the same.”
“You don’t know that.” Her teeth chattered. “Just because you have protection doesn’t mean you’re protected. And if they’re smart, they’ll just wait until your guard’s down… and you can’t live your life that way—just waiting, for the other shoe to drop, just waiting for that next hit, the next shove, the next draw of blood.” her voice caught on a sob.