Page 33 of Kiss Kiss Fang Fang

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“Hey! What did—” I started, but was cut off by a deafening crack.

I blinked a few times, stumbling backward and then realizing what had happened after a short delay. Lucian and Alaric were both staring in fascination at Lucian’s arm.

A high-pitched ringing was blaring in my ears, making everything else sound muffled and unnaturally quiet.

“You shot me,” Lucian said, voice deadpan.

Alaric frowned, like he was trying to think of an argument to state otherwise. “In a sense, the gun shot you.”

“No,” Lucian said, anger rising in his voice. “There’s no in a sense about it. You fucking shot me, you idiot.”

Lucian had been standing by a tree, which he was now resting his elbow on and leaning forward, clearly in a bit of discomfort.

Alaric walked behind him and let out a low, impressed whistle. “Went straight through.”

“Of course it did,” Lucian snapped. “Don’t touch it,” he said, slapping Alaric’s prodding finger away.

I could barely breathe. The gun was still in Alaric’s hand and smoking. He lifted it to look down the barrel in confusion, giving me my third heart attack of the last ten seconds. “I don’t get it. I saw the bullets all come out in that little package. What did I even shoot you with?”

“There was a bullet in the chamber,” I said. My voice sounded a little muffled. I put a finger in my ear and wiggled it around, trying to silence the ringing. “Last time I used a pistol, it didn’t work like that. Or maybe it did… It has been a while, I suppose.”

Lucian looked up. “You’re familiar with these weapons? Can you show us?”

I pointed to his arm. “You have a freaking bullet wound, Lucian. We need to take you to a doctor or something. Are there vampire doctors?”

He smiled, flashing that gorgeous dimple of his. “Do I detect concern?”

“Are you seriously going to fish for a complement when there’s a bullet hole in your arm?”

Lucian fell to one knee, groaning. “It hurts.”

I got down beside him and tried to help him up, but he weighed as much as a granite statue. “God,” I said, groaning with effort. “What are you made out of?”

“Bullshit,” Alaric said, kicking Lucian in the side lightly. “He’s fine. I once watched him regrow an entire arm in a couple hours.”

I looked at Lucian, who was grinning like a rogue.

I made an annoyed noise, then pushed off and planted my hands on my hips. “Are you serious?”

He got up, dusting off his knees. “Sorry. You’re cute when you worry. But yes, I’ll be fine.” He rolled his shoulders back and looked focused. The wound in his arm started to hiss faintly and smoke rose from it.

I watched in fascinated horror as the wound bubbled and sealed up, leaving nothing but dried blood and smooth, flawless skin beneath a torn hole in his suit.

“Wow,” I said, walking closer and touching it. “Does it hurt?”

“Yes. Being shot hurts,” he said. “And fixing it burns.”

“Oh, get over it,” Alaric said. He was already banging another weapon against a rock. “Can’t get these damn bullets out.”

“What do vampires want with guns?”

“What do you think?” Alaric said.

“Don’t you guys have powers or something?”

“I don’t know what your movies imply,” Lucian said. “But it’s more effective to shoot people than it is to try to punch them very hard. And it’s not as if we can fire lasers from our eyes.”

I shrugged. “I guess that makes some sense. So why do you two look so clueless with those things, then?”

“Because the last time we were free, there were fewer buttons.” Alaric brought the gun up high and slammed it down on a rock, shattering it in a very expensive sounding way. He glared at the pieces. “Impossible,” he groaned. “This stuff isn’t all that effective against us, anyway. It’s mostly an annoyance. But if you put enough holes in a vampire, he’ll at least need to go rest. If you really want to kill one, though, you have to—”

“Alaric,” Lucian hissed. “Haven’t you learned your lesson about explaining our weaknesses to humans?”

I wasn’t sure why I felt a little emotional blow from the way he lumped me in as just another human. I guessed it was a sign of how desperately detached I was from any romantic attention from the opposite sex. A few nights of talking and getting to know Lucian and I already thought he should trust me with the secret to ending his immortality.

Stupid.

“Okay, so you have guns so you can put holes in the bad guys if they come after us? Basically, just to slow them down… Am I keeping up?”

“Pretty much,” Alaric said.

“Alaric was also the worst shot I’d ever seen in my life the last time I saw him handle a weapon,” Lucian added. “And I’ve lived a long life.”


Tags: Penelope Bloom Paranormal