I rushed forward, grabbing his arm. "Don't you dare leave!"
"You just got through telling me you want me to step up and demand to raise Tee as my own. Then you tell me not to go out and provide for him? You can't have it both ways. You stay put, you hear me?"
"No." I jutted my chin. "I won't. If you leave, then I will too."
"I'll be so worried about you, I woan be able to focus. You want my concentration divided?"
He knew how much I feared losing him again, and he was using that fear to manipulate me! "Of course not, but--"
"Then stay put." He slammed the door behind him.
"Ugh!" I hadn't felt this helpless since the days right after the Flash when I would primal-scream in my barn.
If he could risk himself in the trench, then I could risk grabby hands and drunken apocalypse survivors in a freaking eatery. Either we trusted saintly Lorraine's laws--or we didn't.
I went to the makeshift sink and washed, then laid out my best outfit: new jeans and a red sweater that Jack had found for me. I had to lie on the bed to zip the fly over my rounding belly.
Suddenly the ground seemed to totter. Metal screeched in the trench, and explosions sounded.
A sob escaped my lips. "Jack."
33
Death
Just inside the sphere
I gazed over my shoulder at the castle in the distance, then forced my attention back to the road. The edge of the sphere loomed not even half a mile away.
No time for doubt, Dominija.
Thanatos whickered impatiently, as if reminding me of the stakes: the loss of the entire game. And just as importantly, the loss of revenge.
I would find my wife before she died, in time to collect her head myself, and then I would proudly wear her icon for the next several centuries.
As I always did.
How badly do I want her, Fool? Very badly indeed.
I dropped the visor on my helmet, urging Thanatos into a gallop. His breaths smoked, his hooves crunching the snow.
As we picked up speed, I leaned forward in the saddle, our movements unconscious after all these years together. I'd missed this rhythm, had missed the chill air stealing through my helmet.
We approached the yellow boundary. Nearing . . . I tensed as we crossed.
Freed.
I took a mental inventory, then exhaled with relief because I felt no different. My hatred of the Empress still seethed. I laughed and ran my gauntlet along Thanatos's neck.
My laughter faded as a hollow feeling grew in the pit of my stomach. Clear of the Hanged Man's influence, my memories began to take shape differently in my mind. I shook my head hard, fighting vertigo.
As emotions shifted, righting themselves, bile rose in my throat. Paul had . . . reversed me.
He'd buried anything good in me--as if in a grave.
I spurred Thanatos into a breakneck pace. What had I done to my wife and child? Images of her escape flashed through my mind.
I gnashed my teeth, my insides flayed. Dear gods, what have I done?
34
The Empress
On the widow's walk, I stared down at the mindboggling scene. "Jack!" I shrieked, not expecting an answer.
Ships sloshed about, toys in a giant bathtub. The ocean liner had tipped over, its bow underwater and sinking fast. Enormous propellers crept round and round.
Much of the metal framework had crashed down.
Rain-soaked Jubileans gathered on this platform, murmurs carrying through the crowd. "They're gone. They're just gone." "The Rift took out the entry ship." "Anybody trapped in there is dead."
All the workers had made it into the first ship and beyond, but then their sole way out had been turned upside down.
Like a reversed tableau.
One by one, Jubileans staggered off the platform, shaking their heads. No citizens mounted a rescue brigade--the crowds that were so quick to call for executions had fallen quiet--because nothing was left to be done.
From my chronicles, I knew that a past Empress had been able to see through her vines. Could I use them to locate Jack amidst that colossal snarl of wreckage? If so, how could I bring him back to the surface?
At my wits' end, I screamed for Circe. No answer as usual. My claws dug into my palms as I fought the urge to pull out my hair.
What can I do? Jack, I can't lose you again!
Mind racing, I scanned the surface. What could I do--?
I spied something out of the corner of my eye. A faint light flickered just above the waterline. I squinted against the foam and stinging rain. A helmet light?
My breath left me. "Jack!" He clung to a remnant of scaffolding.
An enormous wave rumbled along the trench, barreling down on him. If I didn't get him out of its path, he'd be washed away forever.
I was transported right back to that night when I thought I saw him burned alive.
Can't lose him again! Glyphs blazing, I slashed my claws over my forearm, bleeding vines. Uncaring that I might be seen, I commanded my soldiers to charge down the face of the trench. They spread like lightning bolts, forking out.
When they reached him, I perceived the vibration of his relieved yell. Coiling around him, my vines began returning him to me.
I sensed him bellow, "Go, Evie, faster!"
That wave raced toward him. In its grip was more lethal wreckage. He'd be crushed, drowned.
"No, no, no!" I clenched my fists. My vines responded in fits and jerks. Going to be so close. Why couldn't I control my soldiers? They sputtered--even as that foaming wave crested . . . .
Panic drummed in my chest. Nothing mattered beyond this!
With a scream, I raised my bloody hands. "Obey me, soldiers, or pay!" They shot higher, as if in fear.
The wave roared by just below Jack's feet!
I sagged against the railing, murmuring, "Bring him to me . . . ." Soon he was close enough for us to exchange a look.
His face was pale, but his eyes were intent on me. So incredibly brave.
Even over the tumult, I heard a gasp. I whipped my head around. The widow I'd met earlier stared at me, her eyes wide.
I said, "You can't tell anyone about this." A glance from her to Jack. He was only fifteen or so feet away. Almost to the railing.
Mouth ajar, she backed away, then sped down the platform steps. Shit!
I couldn't worry about her right now. Jack was still in danger. Getting him topside was only the first step. I had to get him warm. Closer to me, closer . . .
Here. He hauled himself over the railing. Somehow I forced myself to release him from my protective vines.
"Peekon?" He yanked me against his chest, his strong arms locking around me.
Against his coat, I cried, "You almost died!"
"You saved me." He pressed a kiss atop my head, then drew back. "Come on, I'm taking you home. You got to be freezing out here with no jacket."
"Me?" I felt nothing but adrenaline and the tingle of regeneration across my clawed arm. "What happened?" Though the horse might be out of the barn concerning my abilities, I commanded my vines to drop off into the deep. Sacrificed soldiers.
Jack helped me down the stairs. "I was on the scaffold, about to step onto the ship. I watched it break off right before my eyes. The steps above me collapsed."
As we hurried through the town, people milled around in shock, like Baggers without prey.
"Christ." Jack yanked off his helmet. "They're all gone. An entire shift of workers. Dead." Was he reliving the devastation of his army?
One thought was on repeat: Almost lost him again.
Almost lost him.
Almost lost him.
To keep from screaming, I bit my lip till it nearly bled. Finally home was in sight.
As soon as our tin can's door closed behind us, I turned on him. "I told you not to go!" I burst into tears as I beat on his chest. "You'll never go down in that cursed place again! Do you hear me, Jack? Never."
"Stop it." He grabbed my
wrists. "Calme-toi! You got to keep yourself calm."
Tears fell unchecked. "Screw calm! Do you understand what that was like? To see you clinging . . . and that wave coming. And if you knew what I went through last time . . ." Twist, tighten, constrict. "When I thought you died, I imagined a tourniquet around my heart because it was bleeding out!"
"Evie, non. I'm here." He cupped my face, using his thumbs to brush away my tears. "Not goan anywhere."
He was here. But in this world, how long could we possibly have together? "Jack, I love you. I can't ever lose you again." Adrenaline and fear morphed into heat. Desire. I turned my head to nuzzle one of his palms, kissing the callused skin.
He sucked in a breath, and his big body tensed against mine. Combustion ignited.
When I faced him, his attention dropped to my lips, so I wetted them. His eyes met mine, his smoldering expression asking, Do you want this?
Mine answered: Try to deny me.
He bent down; I'd already gone to my toes. When our lips met, logic evaporated like a water drop on a sizzling skillet. I tasted cold and salt on his lips. Almost lost him. I deepened the kiss, tugging on his neck as he yanked off his heavy coat.
The tension that had been building between us erupted. I drank in his raw passion, unable to get enough. Between kisses, he tore off his soaked shirt as I snatched at his belt. His strong chest heaved breaths.
Tumbling to the pallet. More kissing. Tongues twirling. My God, he's a sinful kisser.