I swallow the lump in my throat and gaze into his eyes. “Forever yours.”
He rests his hand over my heart. “Forever mine.”
I place my hand on his chest. “Forever ours.”
Forever Starting Over
I open my desk drawer and consider taking my old hairbrush, so I’ll have two: the new one and the old one. But then I have a sobering thought. Going off to college is a new experience. It shouldn’t be encumbered by old things. Right?
Chris pulls my hand away from the desk and pushes the drawer closed. “That’s enough. You’ve checked all your drawers four times. I think it’s safe to say you didn’t forget anything.”
The butterflies in my stomach spread over my entire body, until I feel as if my skin is humming with nervous energy.
He turns me around to face him and takes my hands in his. “Are you ready?”
I shake my head. “I’m so nervous.”
“It will be fine. And you can call me if it gets really bad. I’ll be there in thirty minutes.”
I take a deep breath as I look around the room. It looks almost exactly the same as it did before I packed. I didn’t want to bring too many things with me to the dorm. I want this room to still feel like home whenever I visit.
“Are you still playing that gig tonight?” I ask, hoping he’ll tell me it was canceled.
He nods his head. “Couldn’t get out of it. Xander said this guy has a lot of pull with Arista Records. If I play a few more shows there, and they do well, he might pull some strings for me.”
“That’s good.”
I don’t mention how this means I can’t call him if I get really homesick tonight. I can only call him on the nights when he doesn’t have a show.
Jackie walks in and lets out a deep sigh as she tilts her head. “It won’t be the same without you here.”
“Stop pretending, Mom. You were just telling me how happy you’ll be when Claire is gone so you can finally win Dance Dance Revolution.”
“Stop it, Christopher. That’s not funny,” she chides him, but I try not to laugh.
I let go of Chris’s hands and turn to Jackie so I can give her a hug. She squeezes me so tight. I’m almost afraid to pull away. I’m afraid she’s crying. I’ve never seen Jackie cry. I don’t think I’d be able to handle that.
When we finally let go of each other, her eyes are pink and watery, but she blinks a few times and the moment is gone. She wipes a few tears from my jaw and smiles.
“I fully expect you to spend at least one weekend here every month. Chris will pick you up. You’re only forty minutes away.”
“I’ll try my hardest.”
“I know.” She kisses my forehead and gives me another quick hug. “Get out of here before I start crying. Go.”
Chris and I chuckle as we leave Jackie in my bedroom.
“Go. Get out of here,” Chris says, tapping my butt to push me toward the stairs.
“Stop!” I laugh, smacking his hand away.
Chris drives me to the dorm in Jackie’s car. I spend most of the drive there hugging my knees to my chest to comfort myself. When he pulls into the parking lot at Spencer Hall, I get even more nervous as I wonder who I’m rooming with.
Chris parks in the loading zone and grabs my two boxes out of the trunk while I take my purse and my suitcase. I have my card-key, but a girl with curly hair and square glasses is nice enough to hold the door open for us to enter.
“Thanks,” I say.
I hope my roommate is someone like that. Please let me get a nice roommate.
We get off the elevator on the second floor and head for room 207. Chris sets the boxes down next to the door and I knock. I can hear footsteps on the other side of the door. My roommate is already here.
The door opens and a tall girl with beautiful dark hair and golden skin flashes me a tight smile. “Hi,” she says softly.
“Hi. I’m Claire. I think you’re my roommate.” I grab the piece of paper that’s folded and tucked in my back pocket, which shows my dorm assignment.
Before I can unfold the paper, she opens the door wide for us. Chris and I come in with my stuff and I see she’s already taken the bed on the left, closest to the door. Her bed is covered in a gray and lavender comforter. But, other than a few bottles of lotion and hairspray, the desk on her side of the room is pretty bare. No dozens of pictures of friends and family.
Chris places my boxes on my new bed and looks around. “This place could use a little love.”
He wiggles his eyebrows at me and I shake my head as I turn to my new roommate. “I’m sorry. I don’t think I got your name.”
“Senia,” she replies, plopping down on her bed. “Short for Yesenia.”
“That’s pretty.” I look at Chris and he raises his eyebrows. This girl obviously is not in the mood to talk.
“You want me to help you unpack,” he asks, grabbing my hand to pull me against him.
I press my hands against his chest, unsure whether we should be affectionate in front of Senia. It might make her uncomfortable. He smiles when he notices what I’m doing, then he leans in to try and kiss me.
“Stop,” I whisper, but he just laughs. “I can unpack by myself. Are you leaving now?”
“Trying to get rid of me already?”
I try to transmit the answer to that question telepathically, so Senia can’t hear how desperately I don’t want him to leave yet.
“I have to go move the car and get ready for the show,” he says. I guess he didn’t receive my telepathic message. “Do you need anything before I go?”
I shake my head. “Call me before the show … to say goodnight.” I whisper the last three words so my new roommate can’t hear how needy I’m feeling right now.
He smiles and kisses my forehead. “I will. I love you, babe.”
“I love you.”
I wrap my arms around his waist and breathe in as much of his scent as I can before he leaves. I close the door behind him and Senia is looking at me when I turn around.
“Is that your boyfriend?” she asks.
“Yeah. I’m sorry. I didn’t introduce you two. His name is Chris.” I move the boxes off my bed and onto the floor.
“Is he some kind of actor or something? He said he had to get ready for a show.”
I laugh as I lift the suitcase onto my bed. “No, he’s a musician. He has a band. They’re playing a show tonight.”
“Oh.” She keeps playing with her phone for a moment, then she looks up from the screen with a sober expression on her face. “My dad wouldn’t let me date anyone when I was in high school.”
“Sorry,” I reply, unsure what else to say to that.
She shrugs and flashes me a smile. “It’s okay. I think this year is going to be different. You know?”
I let out an uneasy chuckle. “Yeah, I do.”
Forever Promised
After we had sex two months ago, I knew I had to do something to show my commitment to Claire. Something to keep me in her mind when all those sex-starved college guys are trying to get a piece of her.
We’re too young to get married — at least, according to Claire we are. But I hope this promise ring will serve as a little reminder of who she belongs to.
She swears that she hasn’t had a lot of guys hitting on her, but she doesn’t understand her own appeal. Claire doesn’t ooze sex appeal until you know her. Before you know her, she exudes this closed-off, innocent vibe that begs to be explored. You can’t help but want to get close to her; know more about her.
I’ll admit that this aspect of her personality was a huge turn-on for me when she first walked into our living room four years ago. Now, it’s just scary. I don’t want anyone to take Claire away from me. But, most of all, I don’t want anyone to hurt her.
I worry about her every day.
Claire sits down on the grass under a large oak tree in Moore Square. I sit next to her and lay my guitar on the grass next to me. She crosses her legs and sits up straight, lik
e she’s about to start meditating. We look around for a while at the groups of people enjoying a Saturday in the park on a long Columbus Day weekend. Forty feet away, a father is kneeling on the grass, playing catch with his toddler son and it gives me an idea.
“We’re gonna have kids someday, right?”
She laughs. “Not for at least five or six years. But, yeah, I guess.”
“We can’t do it when we’re old. I don’t want to be one of those old parents who doesn’t have energy to go to the park.”
“Twenty-five is not that old.”
“So … if we’re having kids in five or six years, when are we getting married?”
She’s silent for a moment, then she turns to me with a question in her eyes. “What are you getting at?”
“Nothing. Just talking.”
She scrunches her eyebrows together as if she doesn’t believe me. “I don’t know. After I graduate?”
“Why do we have to wait till then? I mean, it’s not like we haven’t already lived together. We could get married before you graduate, then move in together right after graduation.”
“What are you saying? You want to get married now?”
“No, not now. Maybe your senior year or something.” I shrug, suddenly regretting I brought this up. “Anyway, it’s not a big deal. We can get married whenever. Or not. We don’t have to ever get married.”