She found the spot where he'd been working on the tiles. He had two loose already. She settled herself awkwardly on the rafters and set to work prying off another.
It was nearly breakfast when Ashyn descended, filthy and exhausted, her nails broken, her fingertips aching.
"It's done," she said. "The hole is big enough."
Ronan grinned. "Great. They'll bring food any moment. I heard the morning bell. We'll eat and take what we can. Then we'll go."
"And Tova?"
Again, he waved off the concern with a nonchalance that set her teeth on edge. "We'll figure it out. You should go get dressed." Another grin. "Not that I'd complain if you stayed like that. . . ."
She didn't crack a smile. Didn't even blush. She was too tired, too filthy, and too annoyed. She went into the bedroom with Tova, closed the door, cleaned up, and put on the simplest of the dresses her captors had brought.
Wenda's dresses were still there, shoved into the corner as Ashyn had tried to get them out of her sight. She'd figured out what had happened. Ashyn had been lured to Fairview by a spirit that had apparently possessed Wenda even before they'd left Edgewood. Ashyn cursed herself for not realizing it, but her connection with the spirit world apparently did not extend to recognizing one in a living body. Tova hadn't detected it either.
So Wenda had lied about seeing Moria leave Edgewood. Her charge against Gregor had also been a lie. She must have overheard Ronan and Ashyn talking about leaving together and accused Gregor, knowing it would keep the group together, so she could ensure Ashyn reached Fairview, which seemed to be her mission.
Was Wenda still alive? Or had she been consumed by that spirit? Was Moria alive? Their captors said yes. Their captors were cutthroats and thieves.
Ashyn could be the only survivor of her village. And here she was, putting on a pretty frock for breakfast.
When she came out, the meal had arrived. Ronan was stuffing pickled plums into his mouth as if he hadn't eaten in days. Which was, she'd learned, pretty much how he ate every time an unlimited amount of food was placed in front of him. Presumably food in this quantity and variety had not been part of his daily table, as it had hers. And perhaps that should soften her annoyance. It would later, when she looked back, after he'd made his escape. She'd think of his life and would not question why he'd chosen to leave her behind, to consider only himself. That was his life. She should expect nothing more. But for now, thinking of all they'd been through, she did expect more. She couldn't help it.
"We need to talk about Tova," she said as she took a bowl of rice porridge. "He can't go through the roof."
"We'll figure--"
"Do not tell me we'll figure it out." She struggled not to snap the words. "I think we have been through enough for me to expect a little honesty. There is no way to get Tova out through the roof. Therefore I cannot leave. You're waiting for me to realize that. First, though, you needed to make sure I helped you open those tiles for your escape."
He'd chewed steadily slower as she'd spoken. Now he swallowed and his eyes narrowed. "If I wanted to escape alone, Ashyn, I could have done that yesterday, when you were taken. I was outside the village walls. I could have escaped."
"Without a reward."
His face darkened, and he set down his plums.
Before he could answer, she said, "If my tone is harsh, I apologize. I'm tired and my fingers hurt from prying those tiles. But I would have done it for you. I only wish you'd show me the respect of honesty. I've never faulted you for wanting a reward. You deserve it. You helped me, and I do not expect you to suffer with me. As you said, you came back. The reason doesn't matter. The point is that you are leaving alone, and I wish you would not pretend otherwise."
"You could come."
"Without Tova? Even to suggest that--" --shows how little you know me. She wouldn't say that, though. It spoke of disappointment.
"I meant that you come with me, and Tova will find a way back to you. He can take care of himself, Ashyn, and he can do it better if he doesn't need to worry about you."
Ashyn stroked Tova's head. He lay beside her, quiet and still, as if not to interrupt or influence the conversation. "And what if, in trying to get back to me, he's killed? They'll not hesitate to kill him, which means I will not leave him. I did once and . . ."
She didn't say, "And look what happened." Ronan would tell her that the shadow stalkers would have risen even if Tova had been with her that day. He was correct, and yet it was one more small thing that added to the pile of what she'd done wrong, what she felt she'd done wrong.
She looked over at Ronan. "Go. I understand."
He argued, but it was clear there was no other way out of this quandary. She would not leave without Tova, so she could not leave through the roof. As for Ronan . . .
"I must go," he said, shifting, his gaze averted. "I know I ought to stay and look after you--"
"I don't need looking after, Ronan."
"I still would not leave, if there were no other considerations. But I have . . . responsibilities. In the city. People who need me."
Who? she wanted to ask. You were exiled to your death. No one would expect you to return. They will have moved on with their lives and . . .