"I wasn't..." His fingers drummed the arm on his chair. "When I was engaged to Jan, I wasn't using her. I did care for her. I loved her. Just not ... not that way."
"Did Christian know? He was your best friend."
"My straight best friend. That makes a difference, Ms. Jones. If a gay man confesses to his male best friend that he prefers men, he may very well find himself looking for a new friend."
"So Christian never suspected anything."
"I never confirmed anything."
I glanced at Gabriel. He motioned for me to keep pressing. Apparently, I was playing bad cop tonight.
"That's not what I asked, Mr. Marlotte. Did Christian suspect you were gay?"
He wriggled in his chair, pretending to just be shifting for comfort, but from his expression, wishing he could disappear into the deep cushions.
Finally he said, "I don't see what this has to do with--"
"It is important, I'm afraid," Gabriel said, his voice spiced with apology and regret. "You are aware, I know, that Christian was viewed as a potential suspect in his sister's death. We have heard that he was very upset about your breakup. Angry with her, which would be very unlikely if he knew you were gay."
"I ... he ... I confessed one night, just after I got engaged to Jan. We went out drinking, and I had too much."
"Before the breakup?" I said.
He nodded.
"And what did he say?"
"That it didn't matter."
"What?"
"He said it didn't matter." Marlotte spit the words now, old anger and resentment bubbling up. "Jan loved me, and as long as I treated her well, it didn't matter." He turned sharply to face me. "I wasn't really drunk. I pretended to be so I could confess. No one wants his sister marrying a guy who's gay, right? Maybe Chris wouldn't talk to me again. Maybe he'd beat the shit out of me. But whatever happened, I'd be free from the lies and maybe, just maybe, it would be the kick in the ass I needed to come out."
"Only that's not what happened."
"No, it's not." Bitterness etched lines around Marlotte's mouth. "I confessed to my best friend, and he told me to keep lying. Keep hiding. Which I did. For nearly twenty years. All because of Christian."
Chapter Thirty-six
As we were leaving Marlotte's place, Gabriel checked his e-mail. One so engrossed him that he walked right past the car.
"Everything okay?" I called.
"Hmm."
I figured that was all I was getting. Not surprising. I'd only asked to be polite. When we got into the car, though, he started it up and said, "You won't need to worry about Niles Gunderson anymore."
My heart thudded, and I said nothing. Then he looked over, frowning slightly, and I realized some response was required.
"Been locked up in the psych ward again, has he?" I said, as casually as I could.
Gabriel's head tilted. A barely perceptible movement, but I noticed it, and I knew what it meant--that behind those dark shades, his eyes were studying mine. I had to force myself not to turn away. After a moment, I said, "Gabriel?"
He put the car into reverse and backed from the spot.
"After the incident at your house, I was concerned that Mr. Gunderson might be a problem for you. I put out a request to various contacts, asking to be alerted if he spoke to the media or issued a threat of any sort."
Again, silence. Again, a split second too late I realized a response was required.