“I read between the lines and assumed as much. I see you and understand you. What you need to remember is that what we do undercover is different than what we do outside that cover.”
“Where are you going with this, Blake?”
“Once upon a time, I wanted vengeance and by vengeance, I mean blood. Then I met Kara. She pulled me back, kept me from becoming something that would have changed me forever. You think you should have killed Deleon. You’re wrong.”
My lips press together. “He’ll kill again. He’ll come after Pri, damn it.”
“And we’ll get him,” he replies. “We’ll use him. We’ll make him talk.”
“He won’t talk.”
“You might be surprised.”
“I won’t be surprised.”
“You did the right thing, Adrian. And if you question yourself, if you think you aren’t the man you once were, you’re wrong. That decision to spare him proves you wrong on that.”
“I did it for Pri.”
“Pri proved you wrong.” He straightens. “Get some rest. You might have a different mindset after a few hours rest.”
“I won’t.”
He ignores that reply and saunters to the door, pausing to glance back at me. “Talk to me before you make any confessions.”
“I’ve asked for a full immunity agreement.”
“The trial will be on national television. Nothing gives you immunity from the court of public opinion. In today’s world, that alone ruins lives. Let me help you prep.” He doesn’t leave the topic up for discussion.
He opens the door and leaves the room.
I stand up and run my hand through my damp hair. I don’t know what he thinks he knows about anything I’ve done, but considering this is Blake we’re talking about, he probably knows too much. At this point, I’m jittery, raw energy charging my body, and way too much junk is punishing my mind. I’m not sure if I need to take a jog or go to sleep. With both as options, I pull on a T-shirt and by the time I get to my shoes, sleep is already winning. I opt for my boots and grab my bag on my way to the door. I’m not sleeping with Savage.
Once I’m in the hallway, the tug of the room where Pri is likely snuggling under nice, cool sheets in a barely-there gown, is real, but I do not cave to temptation. I do need rest and so does she and we are a whole lot better at fighting and fucking than we are at sleeping together. And maybe Blake is right. I don’t know where my head will be after I sleep.
I end up choosing the theater room for my makeshift bedroom, simply because it’s an easy space to create pitch dark during the day. It also has a couch in front of the rows of theater seating. I drop my bag on the floor, lie down on the cushions, and set my weapon on the floor within easy reach.
I shut my eyes and for a moment, I’ve returned to the cave, Pri naked in my arms, and it’s bittersweet. Her smell, her taste, her soft little sounds. Her trust. The trust is what grinds through me and I’m instantly transported further back in time, much further back in time. Back to the day that predicted the future.
It was a holiday weekend, and me, Rafael, and Alex had been at the cabin, practicing our marksmanship. I’d been eighteen, about to start college, and Rafael had been only twelve. Alex had been twenty-four, about to enter the FBI training academy. He’d been the big brother we looked up to, despite too many times, that we’d feared him.
But I was getting my legs underneath me, recruiting early for the FBI. I’d felt confident. I didn’t fear him anymore and he didn’t like it.
I shove aside the memory that will not let me sleep, but I know that that was the day that told a story of one brother killing another.Chapter SixteenPRI
My shower is long, and hot, in a fancy bathroom with shiny white tiles and marble floors. My bathroom is stocked with all my products from home, and the closet is filled with two large suitcases packed with my things. I don’t dwell on the fact that one of these big alpha men packed for me or the fact that they clearly don’t expect me to go home soon. If I dwell on those things, it will take me no place good. I can’t focus on my job. But the truth is, once I’m dressed in leggings, a pink tank, and sneakers, clothes I can work or sleep in, the room is too big and too empty.
I stand in the doorway between the bathroom and the bedroom and I’m alone. I feel alone, uncomfortably alone. And it’s not because I have trouble being alone. I live alone. I’ve been on my own most of my life, even when I was working with family and wearing Logan’s ring. It’s also not because I’m in a strange house, in a giant master bedroom, complete with a king-sized bed. Or the fact that I’m here to hide from an assassin. I knew the dangers of taking this case. No. I’m uncomfortably alone because Adrian is not here.