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I explore her body as if it’s the first or last time, but she rushes me along with a “Hardin . . . please . . .”

I bring my mouth to her most sensitive area and slide my tongue across her slowly, savoring her taste as it consumes my senses.

“Oh God,” she pants and pulls harder on my hair.

Her hips buck up off of the bed and she presses herself against my tongue. I pull back and she whines. I love that she’s as desperate for me as I am for her. I quickly lean up and open the drawer on the nightstand, grabbing the foil packet and tear it open with my teeth.

She watches me and I watch her. I watch the way her chest rises and falls in anticipation. I push down my boxers and lean over to plant a small kiss on her cheek, my cock resting on her thigh for a couple of heartbeats.

I straighten up and put the condom on. “Stay still,” I instruct.

She obliges and I climb back between her legs. The anticipation is exhilarating. I’m so hard that it hurts.

“You’re always so ready for me, baby,” I muse, collecting her moisture on my fingers before bringing them to her mouth to have her taste. She’s shy but doesn’t protest as she wraps her tongue around my finger. The sensation causes me to ease into her. The feeling is exquisite and one I have missed so, so much. “Christ,” I curse as she moans in relief.

All of my previous heartache dissolves as I bury myself into her, filling her up completely. Her eyes roll back in her head, and I deliberately circle my hips slowly before pulling out and pushing back in repeatedly.

“More . . . please, Hardin.”

Fuck, I love to hear her beg. “No, baby . . . I want to go slow this time.” I rotate my hips again. I want to savor every second of this. I want it to be slow and I want her to feel how much I love her, how sorry I am for hurting her, and how I’m willing to do anything for her. I bring my mouth to hers and caress her tongue with mine. I groan when her fingernails dig into my biceps with a force sure to leave crescent marks in their wake.

“I love you . . . I love you so much,” I tell her and increase my pace slightly. I know I’m torturing her with my teasing, slow movements.

“I . . . I love you,” she moans, and her legs begin to shake, telling me she’s almost there.

I would love to see what we look like in this moment, molded together yet so separated. The contrast of her smooth, clear skin and the black ink covering mine as she runs her hands up and down my arms must be quite the sight. It’s dark meets light; it’s chaotic perfection; it’s everything I fear, want, and need.

Her moans become louder, and I bring my hand to her mouth so she can bite on it. “Shhh . . . let go, baby.”

My thrusts quicken as her soft body goes rigid under mine and she calls my name into my hand. Within seconds I’m joining her, getting high off her. She’s the perfect drug. “Look at me,” I breathe. Her eyes meet mine and I’m done for. I spill out all of me, and her body relaxes, leaving us both a panting mess. I roll off the condom and toss it into the bin next to the bed.

When I move to climb off, she grabs my arms to stop me. I smile down at her and stay still. I use my elbow to prop me up and keep most of my weight off of her. Tessa’s hand touches my cheek, she uses the pad of her thumb to draw small circles against my damp skin.

“I love you, Hardin,” she says quietly.

“I love you, Tess,” I respond and lay my head against her chest.

My eyes are heavy as I feel her breathing slow, and I fall asleep listening to the steady thrum of her heartbeat.

Chapter thirty-six

TESSA

Hardin’s head is heavy on my stomach when the sound of my phone vibrating on the table wakes me up. I lift him gently, as gently as I can, and retrieve the annoying object. The screen flashes with my mother’s name, and I groan before answering it.

“Theresa?” my mother chimes through the receiver.

“Yes.”

“Where are you, and what time will you be here?” she asks.

“I’m not coming there,” I tell her.

“It’s Christmas Eve, Tessa, I know you are upset over this thing with your father, but you need to spend Christmas with me. You shouldn’t be at some hotel alone.”

I do feel slightly guilty for not spending the holidays with my mother. She isn’t the nicest woman, but I’m all she has. Still, I say, “I’m not driving all the way there, Mother. It’s snowing out and I don’t want to be there.”

Hardin stirs and lifts his head. Just as I’m about to tell him not to speak, he opens his mouth. “What’s wrong?” he says, and I hear my mother gasp.

“Theresa Young! What are you thinking?” she shouts.

“Mother, I’m not doing this right now.”

“That’s him, isn’t it? I know that voice!”

This is a terrible way to wake up. I move Hardin off me and sit up, covering my naked body with the blanket. “I am getting off the phone now, Mother.”

“Don’t you dare hang—”

But I do hang up. And then put my phone on silent. I knew she would find out sooner or later; I was just hoping it would be later. “Well, she knows we’re back to doing . . . us. She heard you, and now she’s freaking out,” I say and hold my phone up to him to show the two calls from her in the past minute.

He curls around behind me. “You knew she would, so really it’s almost better that she found out this way.”

“Not really. I could have told her instead of her just hearing you in the background.”


Tags: Anna Todd After Young Adult