Page 99 of After (After 1)

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“Great, Tessa and I have already set the table.”

Landon goes over to where Dakota sits, puts his arm around her waist, and leads her to the table. I take my seat across from them and glance over at the empty place setting next to me, which Karen had set up for “purposes of symmetry,” but it just makes me a little sad. In another life Hardin would be sitting next to me, holding my hand the way Landon is Dakota’s, and I could lean into him without fear of being rejected. I’m beginning to wish I had invited Zed even though it would have been extremely awkward; having dinner with two deeply in-love couples may prove worse.

Ken enters, saving me from my thoughts. He walks over and kisses Karen on her cheek before sitting down.

“Dinner looks great, honey,” he says and playfully places a napkin on his lap. “Dakota, you get more beautiful each time I see you.” He smiles at her, then turns to me. “And Tessa, congratulations on your internship at Vance. Christian called me and told me. You made a wonderful first impression on him.”

“Thank you again for calling him; it’s such an amazing opportunity.” I smile and the table’s silent for a moment while we all try Karen’s chicken, which is delicious.

“Sorry I’m late,” I hear from behind me and my fork falls out of my hand onto my plate.

“Hardin! I didn’t know you were coming!” Karen says nicely, then looks at me. I look away. My pulse is already quickening.

“Yeah, remember we discussed it last week, Tessa?” He smiles his menacing smile and takes the seat next to me.

What is wrong with him? Why can’t he just leave me alone? I know it is partly my fault for letting him get to me, but he really enjoys playing cat-and-mouse. Everyone’s eyes are on me, so I nod and pick up my fork. Dakota looks confused and Landon looks worried.

“You must be Delilah?” Hardin says to her.

“Oh, Dakota, actually,” she corrects him sweetly.

“Yeah, Dakota. Same thing,” he mutters and I kick him under the table.

Landon glares at him, but Hardin doesn’t seem to notice. Ken and Karen go into conversation between themselves, as do Dakota and Landon. I stay focused on my food and think of an exit strategy.

“So, how’s your evening so far?” Hardin asks in a casual tone. He knows that I won’t cause a scene, so he is trying to annoy me.

“Fine,” I answer quietly.

“You’re not going to ask me how mine is?” He smirks.

“Nope,” I mumble and take another bite.

“Tessa, was that your car outside?” Ken asks and I nod.

“Oh yeah, I finally got my own car!” I say, with a little extra excitement in the hopes that everyone else will join in so I’m not stuck talking to just Hardin.

Hardin raises his eyebrow at me. “When?”

“The other day,” I answer. You know, the day that you told me that it’s all about the chase?

“Oh. Where did you get it?”

“A used-car lot,” I answer and watch Dakota and Karen both try to hide their smiles. Sensing an opportunity to direct the attention off me, I say, “So, Dakota, Landon told me you were thinking of going to New York for a ballet school?” She tells us all about her plans to move to New York, and Landon looks genuinely happy for her despite the distance that will stay between them.

When she finishes, Landon looks at his phone and says, “Well, we should get going soon. That bonfire waits for no man.”

“What?” Karen says. “Okay, but at least take some of the dessert with you!”

Landon nods and helps her put some into a Tupperware container.

“Are you going to ride with me?” Hardin says. I look around like I’m confused about whom he’s addressing.

“I’m talking to you,” he states.

“What? No, you’re not going,” I tell him.

“Yes, I am. And you can’t stop me from going, so you might as well ride with me.” He smiles and tries to put his hand on my thigh.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” I say under my breath.

“Can we talk outside?” he asks and looks toward his father.

“No,” I say quietly—every time Hardin and I “talk,” I end up crying.

But Hardin stands up quickly and grabs my hand, pulling me to my feet. “We’ll be outside,” he announces, and pulls me through the living room and out the front door.

Once we’re outside, I yank my arm away and warn him, “Stop touching me!”

He shrugs. “Sorry, but you weren’t going to come with me.”

“Because I didn’t want to.”

“I am sorry. For everything, okay?” His fingers play with his lip ring and I avoid focusing on his mouth. I stare at the way his eyes search my face.

“You’re sorry? You’re not sorry, Hardin—you just want to mess with me. Just stop. I am exhausted and drained from fighting with you all the time. I can’t do it anymore. Isn’t there anyone else that you can mess with? Heck, I’ll even help you find someone, some poor innocent girl for you to torture as long as it isn’t me.”

“That’s not what I am doing. I know I am back and forth a lot with you, and I don’t know why I do it. But if you give me one chance, one more chance, I will stop. I tried to stay away from you but I can’t. I need you . . .” He looks down at the deck, rubbing the tips of his boots together.

The audacity of what he’s saying helps me keep my tears in check this time; his ego has seen quite enough of them. “Stop! Just stop. Aren’t you tired of this? If you needed me you wouldn’t treat me the way you do. You told me yourself it was all about the chase, remember? You can’t just show up here after everything and act like nothing happened.”


Tags: Anna Todd After Young Adult