“You cracked the screen?”
“Sorry.”
He sighed, but then—with the others—retreated. Fifty figures, each distinct, each a chunk of my mind. People with lives, pasts, families, passions. At times, it was just so much to track. Kalyani gave me a hug as she joined Rahul. Ivans gave me a fist bump. Oliver let me hold his stuffed corgi, which I did for an embarrassingly long time, before they finally left me.
I tried to imagine what this was like for them, discovering that for the first time in years, I was losing control. That Sandra had returned—a figure who to most of them was mere legend.
Wilson looked on, helpless, though his niece—Barb—was more visibly disturbed by it all. Ivy studied her, shaking her head.
He’s been training her for months now, I thought, remembering. Because he’s retiring. Leaving me.
“Wilson,” I said. “I … I realize—”
I cut off as I spotted something. The withdrawal of most of the aspects left a conspicuous figure standing in the hallway, holding a notepad. She was tall, Asian, and wearing a relaxed pantsuit. Jenny Zhang. The reporter.
I lurched toward her, shoving past Wilson and grabbing her by the shoulders. “How did you get in here!” I shouted, feeling betrayed, embarrassed. How dare she see me at my most vulnerable!
“You broke our promise,” she snapped. “I need to get this down. For the book.”
“Steve?” Ivy said.
“What book?” I said to Jenny. “I didn’t give you permission to write a book! You’re trespassing!”
“Steve, I think she can see us.”
I froze, my eyes locked with Jenny’s. Then she turned and looked right at Ivy.
“Wilson,” I said, growing cold, “can you see the person I’m holding right now?”
“Master Leeds? Is it one of your aspects?”
“Can you see her?”
“No. Unless you wish for me to … to pretend?”
Oh hell.
“What did we do earlier today?” I said to Wilson. “Where did we go?”
“Sir? Barb and I drove you around a poorer section of town, and we stopped at an abandoned building. I must admit I was worried, though grateful you told me to stay close by. You stood in an empty room for a while, then came running out.”
I let go of Jenny, who straightened her jacket with an unperturbed air.
I put my hand to my head. It wasn’t possible. I wasn’t supposed to be crazy. The aspects … shielded me from that. They were insane, and I kept them organized. I … I could tell what was real.…
“Was Sandra real?” I asked Wilson.
“Yes, sir,” he said. “You’ve never questioned that before.… Master Leeds? This is caused by my leaving, isn’t it? I’m sorry. But sir, I just can’t keep doing this. Not after the case with that assassin, and then the fire last year. Barb, though, she’s excited to help you. She’ll be good at it, sir.”
I stood there until the sound of footsteps announced Tobias’s arrival. Ivy ran to him and whispered to him, and the old historian nodded, running a hand through his powder-white hair. Then he smiled.
“It’s all right,” he said. “He’s bound to be a little upset. Why, we’ve finally found Sandra!”
Ivy whispered something else, and Tobias glanced at Armando’s room, lips pursing grimly. Then he smiled again, walked over, and gripped me—gently but firmly—on the shoulder. “Strength, Stephen. Let’s pull through this. You can do it. You’ve always been able to do it.”
“Armando…” I whispered.
“It happened. We just have to make sure it doesn’t happen again. Focus. Sandra has returned.”
I looked to Ivy, who pointedly did not look at Armando’s room. “I think … I think maybe I’ve been wrong. You’re right, Steve. We need to find Sandra. Maybe she’s back for a reason; maybe someone up above is watching out for us.”
Nearby, Jenny was writing all of this down. How on Earth had I created her? And why?
“Wilson?” I asked, showing him my phone. “Yes, I know it’s cracked. Not that. The text.”
“Help,” he read, tilting his glasses and squinting. “And a sequence of numbers and letters. From … Sandra?”
I sighed in relief. So the text was real. Unless … unless Wilson was a hallucination too.
I couldn’t go down that particular rabbit hole. I had to believe I had at least that shred of sanity left.
“Where’s Ngozi?” I asked Ivy.
“Didn’t you see her back off? The sight of the blood … I think she’s getting some air.”
My forensic scientist was a germophobe who couldn’t stand the sight of blood. My brain was a very strange place sometimes.
“See if you can find her,” I said to Ivy. “I want her along. You, her, me, Tobias, J.C.—once he catches up.”
Ivy nodded and ran off.
“And me,” Jenny noted.
“Not you,” I said, walking toward the stairwell. Tobias walked with me and kept his hand on my shoulder, as if I were the frail old man, not him. We passed Barb and I looked her up and down. Short blonde hair, perky grin. So young. “I haven’t scared you off?” I asked.
“Honestly, this is really interesting,” she said. “You are so crazy.”
“Go start the car and wait for me.”
She ran off, and I looked back at Wilson. “Can she at least make lemonade?”
“My own recipe, sir. And I must say, she’s taken to it with acumen.” He hesitated. “Perhaps I could add another day or two—”
“No. This had to happen eventually, Wilson. You’ve given more than enough. More than anyone probably should have given.” I’d already made sure there was something nice in the bank for him—I’d done that years ago, and for some reason, he’d just kept on with me. Perhaps he was the crazy one.
I started down the steps with Tobias. From above us on the stairs, Wilson watched us go. “Sir,” he called after me. “If, for some reason, you aren’t fighting terrorists or finding teleporting cats tonight, I would love to have you at the party. My brother is hosting it.”
“A party?” I said, looking over my shoulder. “With real people?”
“The best kind, sir.”
“Yeah. I’ll pass. But thanks anyway.”
FOUR
I haven’t always been this bad about real people. It was only … what, a year and a half ago that I’d been going out on dates? All had been unmitigated disasters, but at least I’d tried.
Ivy claimed I unintentionally sabotaged those interactions. She had all kinds of theories as to why, none of them particularly flattering.
I found Audrey, Chin, and a few of the others in the game room. It was a place they could be around each other for mutual support in facing what was coming. Stormy was making drinks. Entering the room, I braced myself and tried to keep my focus. Sandra. Sandra would know how to help me.
To be honest, I’d been sliding for months now. Maybe years. But I could turn it around.
Near the bar, Audrey had her feet up on an ottoman, chewing on some Sugar Babies candies while watching cat videos on her phone. Ever since J.C. had gotten a phone, the rest had wanted one—except Harrison, the technophobe.
“Check it out,” Audrey said, showing me a cat meowing as its owner opened a can of food—then stopping abruptly every time the owner stopped. “I can’t get enough of this stuff.”
I just stood there, staring at her.
“What?” she asked.
“We’re in the middle of a disaster,” I whispered. “Aspects are being corrupted, Audrey.”
“Yeah. Can’t decide if I’ll be the next to go, since I know too much, or if it would be more ironic for me to go last.”
“You were supposed to be—”
“Relax,” she said, showing me a piece of paper. “I cracked it. I needed a key to the cipher, which turned out to be the room number at the hotel where you two first met. With that plugged in, it didn’t take long. These are GPS coordinates.”
/> I took the paper with a relieved sigh. “Where is it?”