The other bridgemen regarded him with wide eyes.
“Supplies,” Teft said.
“We have these spheres,” Kaladin said, pulling out his pouch. “A wealth of them, right here. We can take the armor and weapons from the dead over there and use those to defend ourselves from bandits. It will be hard, but we won’t be chased!”
The men were starting to grow excited. However, something gave Kaladin pause. What of the wounded bridgemen back in the camp?
“I’ll have to stay behind,” Kaladin said.
“What?” Moash demanded.
“Someone will need to,” Kaladin said. “For the good of our wounded in camp. We can’t abandon them. And if I stay behind, I can support the story. Wound me and leave me on one of the plateaus. Sadeas is sure to send scavengers back. I’ll tell them my crew was hunted down in retribution for desecrating the Parshendi corpses, our bridge tossed into the chasm. They’ll believe it; they’ve seen how the Parshendi hate us.”
The crew was all standing now, shooting glances at one another. Uncomfortable glances.
“We’re not leaving without you,” Sigzil said. Many of the others nodded.
“I’ll follow,” Kaladin said. “We can’t leave those men behind.”
“Kaladin, lad—” Teft began.
“We can talk about me later,” Kaladin interrupted. “Maybe I’ll go with you, then sneak back into camp later to rescue the wounded. For now, go salvage from those bodies.”
They hesitated.
“It’s an order, men!”
They moved, offering no further complaint, rushing to pilfer from the corpses Sadeas had abandoned. That left Kaladin alone beside the bridge.
He was still unsettled. It wasn’t just the wounded back in camp. What was it, then? This was a fantastic opportunity. The type he’d have practically killed to get during his years as a slave. The chance to vanish, presumed dead? The bridgemen wouldn’t have to fight. They were free. Why, then, was he so anxious?
Kaladin turned to survey his men, and was shocked to see someone standing beside him. A woman of translucent white light.
It was Syl, as he’d never seen her before, the size of a regular person, hands clasped in front of her, hair and dress streaming to the side in the wind. He’d had no idea she could make herself so large. She stared eastward, her expression horrified, eyes wide and sorrowful. It was the face of a child watching a brutal murder that stole her innocence.
Kaladin turned and slowly looked in the direction she was staring. Toward the Tower.
Toward Dalinar Kholin’s desperate army.
The sight of them twisted his heart. They fought so hopelessly. Surrounded. Abandoned. Left alone to die.
We have a bridge, Kaladin realized. If we could get it set… Most of the Parshendi were focused on the Alethi army, with only a token reserve force down at the base near the chasm. It was a small enough group that perhaps the bridgemen could contain them.
But no. That was idiocy. There were thousands of Parshendi soldiers blocking Kholin’s path to the chasm. And how would the bridgemen set their bridge, with no archers to support them?
Several of the bridgemen returned from their quick scavenge. Rock joined Kaladin, staring eastward, expression becoming grim. “This thing is terrible,” he said. “Can we not do something to help?”
Kaladin shook his head. “It would be suicide, Rock. We’d have to run a full assault without an army to support us.”
“Couldn’t we just go back a little of the way?” Skar asked. “Wait to see if Kholin can cut his way down to us? If he does, then we could set our bridge.”
“No,” Kaladin said. “If we stayed out of range, Kholin would assume us to be scouts left by Sadeas. We’ll have to charge the chasm. Otherwise he’d never come down to meet us.”
That made the bridgemen pale.
“Besides,” Kaladin added. “If we did somehow save some of those men, they’d talk, and Sadeas would know we still live. He’d hunt us down and kill us. By going back, we’d throw away our chance at freedom.”
The other bridgemen nodded at that. The rest had gathered, carrying weapons. It was time to go. Kaladin tried to squelch the feeling of despair inside him. This Dalinar Kholin was probably just like the others. Like Roshone, like Sadeas, like any number of other lighteyes. Pretending virtue but corrupted inside.
But he has thousands of darkeyed soldiers with him, a part of him thought. Men who don’t deserve this terrible fate. Men like my old spear crew.
“We owe them nothing,” Kaladin whispered. He thought could see Dalinar Kholin’s banner, flying blue at the front of his army. “You got them into this, Kholin. I won’t let my men die for you.” He turned his back on the Tower.
Syl still stood beside him, facing eastward. It made his very soul twist in knots to see that look of despair on her face. “Are windspren attracted to wind,” she asked softly, “or do they make it?”
“I don’t know,” Kaladin said. “Does it matter?”
“Perhaps not. You see, I’ve remembered what kind of spren I am.”
“Is this the time for it, Syl?”
“I bind things, Kaladin,” she said, turning and meeting his eyes. “I am honorspren. Spirit of oaths. Of promises. And of nobility.”
Kaladin could faintly hear the sounds of the battle. Or was that just his mind, searching for something he knew to be there?
Could he hear the men dying?
Could he see the soldiers running away, scattering, leaving their warlord alone?
Everyone else fleeing. Kaladin kneeling over Dallet’s body.
A green-and-burgundy banner, flying alone on the field.
“I’ve been here before!” Kaladin bellowed, turning back toward that blue banner.
Dalinar always fought at the front.
“What happened last time?” Kaladin yelled. “I’ve learned! I won’t be a fool again!”
It seemed to crush him. Sadeas’s betrayal, his exhaustion, the deaths of so many. He was there again for a moment, kneeling in Amaram’s mobile headquarters, watching the last of his friends being slaughtered, too weak and hurt to save them.
He raised a trembling hand to his head, feeling the brand there, wet with his sweat. “I owe you nothing, Kholin.”
And his father’s voice seemed to whisper a reply. Somebody has to start, son. Somebody has to step forward and do what is right, because it is right. If nobody starts, then others cannot follow.
Dalinar had come to help Kaladin’s men, attacking those archers and saving Bridge Four.
The lighteyes don’t care about life, Lirin had said. So I must. So we must.
So you must….
Life before death.
I’ve failed so often. I’ve been knocked to the ground and trod upon.
Strength before weakness.
This would be death I’d lead my friends to…
Journey before destination.…death, and what is right.
“We have to go back,” Kaladin said softly. “Storm it, we have to go back.”
He turned to the members of Bridge Four. One by one, they nodded. Men who had been the dregs of the army just months before—men who had once cared for nothing but their own skins—took deep breaths, tossed away thoughts for their own safety, and nodded. They would follow him.