“That’s okay.” I swallow down the enormous lump in my throat and ruffle his hair. “That’s just fine.”CHAPTER 25FeeneyI want to think Luke put Shade up to it, leaving that message. I want to think so, but I just can’t force myself to do it. It was too honest. That bit at the end…Luke told Shade. Luke might not have told Shade everything in order to protect him, but he did tell him that he lied to me, and that’s the reason why I left. He also did tell Shade I was mad. Of course Shade misses me. I miss him too. I loved his message, and I played it over and over and over again while I sat on the lumpy motel bed and cried until my eyes went dry.
I know I have to talk to Luke. I can’t avoid it. If I want to see Shade, I can’t just show up and pretend as if nothing happened. It would be so horribly awkward, and I don’t want to get into it with Luke at any place where Shade could overhear.
I’m not going to shade Shade just because I’m pissed at his dad. Haha. I wish it were funny. I wish any of these were funny. I haven’t quite gotten around to finding it humorous yet.
It’s been weeks, and I’m still living in a motel room so cheap that I’m not sure I’m the only one living in the room. Thank god it doesn’t have bed bugs. Ants, yes. Spiders, yes. Flies, yes. But bed bugs? I’ve yet to find evidence of any. The place, with its tiny bathroom, dinged-up tub, ancient pink toilet, lumpy bed, and stained carpet and curtains at the window, looks like it could feature in a horror movie.
Unfortunately, I still have Luke’s number on my phone. Or maybe I should say Max’s number. Maxwell? Ugh. Yup. If I had any doubts about the universe hating me before…
I wait a day after the message, a terrible day, and then send Luke a text. I don’t know why, but I can’t stop thinking of him that way. He’s not a Max or a Maxwell, at least not to me. Maybe that makes me incredibly stupid because I sure feel like it when I think about the time at his house.
My phone buzzes right after I fire off the text. It’s like Luke’s sitting on it, waiting for it to ring—sitting on it. Bad choice of words. It makes me think about him literally sitting on it, which makes me think about his butt, which is nice and firm and—why? Why do I have to go there?
I pick up my phone and turn it over with a clammy palm.
If you want, you can come over to the house to talk. Shade’s with my dad right now.
Wow. Poor kid. But maybe Luke’s dad treats Shade better than he treats Luke. No. No, I will not feel sorry for Luke. I refuse to feel even a shred of sympathy.
My major bank accounts are still frozen, and the one I opened to put in the money I made while working for Luke is getting pretty low. I don’t have a car, and I still don’t have a job even though I’ve probably sent out a hundred resumes. I know things take time, but I just wish they wouldn’t take so long. I know if the cash runs out, I’m going to be forced to either suck it up and go and talk to my parents or call Sam. She’s also called me a thousand times and sent probably just as many texts, but I refuse to answer them. I know she was probably trying to help me but playing a part in the whole scheme really made me feel betrayed.
I finally text Luke back with a smartass, though also brutally honest, response.
If you’re paying for the cab, I’ll come over. But this better not be a trap or a trick. If it is, you have no idea what I’m capable of…
When Luke responds, he doesn’t include a laughing face emoji or a smiling face emoji or anything that says he doesn’t take my threat seriously. But ultimately, I wouldn’t do anything to Luke. Things like letting the world know Luke is really Maxwell Stone. I wouldn’t try and ruin his life and privacy that way or make it so he has to move because I would never hurt Shade like that. Even if Luke didn’t have a son who I happened to adore, I still couldn’t do anything that brutal. The best revenge is probably just to ignore him like he doesn’t mean a thing to me.
Like he doesn’t even exist.
Tell them to wait when you pull up. I’ll come out and pay.
I take a deep breath and respond.
Now?
Shade’s not here for another two hours.