“What is it?” Hollis asked.
“He kept saying how he’s finally learned his lesson, that being in jail has helped him see the light, and he can’t wait to come home so we can be together again.”
“Why did that bother you?”
“I don’t want to live with him, Uncle Hollis…ever again. It’s not that I don’t love my father. But I don’t think I could trust him. I feel safe with you. Can he really make me go back with him?”
Hollis paused, looking over at me. “That’s complicated, Hailey. Technically, he can, but…”
“Can’t you do something?”
He seemed at a loss for words.
She looked like she was about to cry. “Do you not want me forever?”
Hollis bent so he was eye level with her. He placed his hands on her cheeks. “That’s not it at all, Hailey. I promise if it were up to me, I’d have you with me permanently. You’ve given me purpose. Having you around has changed my life, but it’s all been for the better. Taking care of you makes me very happy. Don’t ever doubt that, okay?”
She sniffled, and then nodded. “Okay.”
That squeezed my heart. Say what you might based on some of his actions, but overall, Hollis was a good guy.
“The law doesn’t always keep someone’s best interests in mind, though,” he told her. “If the courts were to deem your father fit to parent you once he completed his term, there wouldn’t be anything I could legally do.” He wiped her eyes. “But I promise you this: I will do everything in my power to keep you with me, okay? And if I can’t, you won’t be able to get rid of me. I’ll be over there every day to make sure you’re okay.”
Before he was transported to Ohio on an outstanding warrant, Stephen had lived with Hailey in New York. Assuming he would choose to go back there, Hollis being able to check in on her daily wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility.
“What about Elodie?” she asked.
“What about me, sweetie?” I smiled.
“I don’t want you to lose your job if I have to go back to Dad’s.”
“Oh, don’t worry about that, honey. There are plenty of things I can do. I’ll find a job.”
“Trust me. She’s very versatile,” Hollis cracked.
I gave him the evil eye, which transformed into a smile. He smiled back.
His response surprised me. “I’ll try to keep Elodie with you if I can. Even if you’re with your dad, I’ll pay to keep her with you, provided Elodie can stay.”
My eyes met his. Then I turned to her. “You won’t be able to get rid of me, Hailey. Even if I’m not being paid, I’ll still be in your life. I promise, okay?”
I knew that assurance meant somehow Hollis would always be in my life, too. He wasn’t going anywhere, so something had to change.
This was a reminder that I needed to move on from these feelings, move on with my life, despite him being in it.
Hailey let out a relieved breath. “I feel better now.” She sighed. “I know my mom is looking down and happy I have you guys.”
I knew Hailey’s mom had died of a drug overdose when she was little. It always broke my heart. But despite her mother’s decisions while on this Earth, Hailey spoke of her fondly, as if her mom were an angel watching over her now.
“You and I have more in common than you think,” Hollis said, placing his hand atop her head. “I know how hard it is to lose your mother. I know I had mine for much longer than you had yours, but losing her has never gotten any easier for me, no matter how old I am.”Chapter 21* * *Hollis – 12 years agoAnna rubbed my back. “Can I get you anything to eat? You haven’t eaten all day.”
“No, thank you.”
It was the day after my mother’s funeral. Yesterday had been exhausting, having to deal with everyone’s sympathies, having to actually talk to people while in this condition. But nothing was worse than the eerie quiet of today—the day after. No more I’m sorrys, no more noise, no more food deliveries. The quiet was deafening. And the harsh reality had hit: my mother wasn’t coming back.
I’d given up everything to stay home and take care of her while she was sick. I’d turned down the UCLA baseball scholarship because it would have meant leaving her. And it wasn’t just me who’d given up the opportunity to attend UCLA. When Anna realized I wasn’t leaving my mother, she’d stayed here and attended the local college with me. While I felt a lot of guilt over that, I couldn’t imagine what it would have been like if Anna had left on top of everything else.
With Anna by my side, my life had become about taking care of my mother. And I would do it all over again. Now that my mother was gone, I was supposed to have all of the freedom in the world. Yet I felt numb. I didn’t know who I was, if not my mother’s son. Despite this new freedom, in a strange way, I wasn’t sure what I’d do with my life now. I’d have to figure out a way to pick myself up and start over.