"To hide. You're hiding."
"If I'm hiding, you can see that the last thing I would need is the complication of a boyfriend."
"Boyfriend?" Amusement tinged his voice.
She was mortified. Of course he hadn't said a word about being her official boyfriend. They were more like . . . "Okay, fuck buddies," she snapped. "I don't have room in my life for you."
All amusement was gone from his face, leaving his features stony and cold. His ever-changing eyes were back to green-blue. She didn't know which was worse, knowing that his leopard was there staring at her like so much prey, or the man, doing the same thing.
"We are not fuck buddies," he hissed, between clenched teeth. "You are permanent. Mine. My woman. My mate. I'm not your damn boyfriend. I'm no boy and I'm not yet your friend. We're working on that. I'm your man. Your mate. I belong to you in the same way you belong to me. I have your body and you have mine. I want your heart and your mind. I want to be your best friend. And I want to be all that for you."
He was nuts. Crazy. Totally insane. He was the most gorgeous man she'd ever seen--and the scariest, and she'd seen plenty of scary men. She touched her tongue to her lips, trying to think. Up close to the heat of his body, breathing him in with every breath, feeling his dangerous pull, it was impossible to think straight. She looked around her, needing a reprieve. "What do you do? Why are all these men working around your home?"
"Have you ever heard of Drake Donovan? He runs a security agency."
She'd heard of him. As far away as Miami, Drake Donovan's name was known. She nodded without speaking, because she couldn't say where she'd heard the name if he asked.
"He has teams all over the world. We go in and take back victims that have been kidnapped. Or we do the drop to pay the ransom. Sometimes we act as bodyguards. I run one of his branches, and most of the men take the jobs when needed. Right now, we're trying to put this place together. There are cabins everywhere, all of which need updating. Aside from the main house, I'll need each of those fixed up or torn down and rebuilt. The grounds need work. We have enemies, so I need a decent, up-to-date security system. And then there's you."
He wasn't lying about any of those things. Gatita heard the truth in his voice, yet . . . Sonia didn't altogether trust him.
I do.
You do because you want to be with his leopard, you hussy.
"Tell me the reason you're afraid to be with me."
"I just met you," she repeated. "I don't really know you. I'm not going to make some crazy commitment when I don't have a real clue who you are."
"Fine. Then agree to work here." He gestured back toward the house. "You can see the work is legitimate. And agree to see me outside of work."
The temptation was strong, even though she knew better. "It isn't a good idea," she said reluctantly, but he was already smiling.
"Maybe not, but we need to try." He caught her hand. "Let me show you the cabins. I didn't tell Jerry about them because I wanted to ask you if they just needed to be torn down. If so, my men can start that work, and you can bring in crews to rebuild. There's history there, but the feel of them when I go inside is . . ." He trailed off. "I'd rather you judge for yourself."
Sonia went with him, terrified of what she'd just done, what she'd committed to doing in the future. Seeing him. What was wrong with her? She might get him killed. But was she going to live her life completely alone? He was leopard. He obviously knew more about that world than she did. He could explain things. Teach her. Everyone thought she was dead. There was no reason anyone would be looking for her.
They moved together in silence, walking along a worn path deeper into the grove of trees. She could see that small cabins dotted the trail. They were very old and some were so dilapidated, no matter how historical they were, they were too far gone to be saved. The cabin he took her to had been updated with more modern conveniences.
He stepped back, staying on the porch, opened the door and waved her through. For some reason, that made Sonia reluctant to enter. She studied his face for a moment. It was an expressionless mask. His face looked as if it could have been chiseled from the hardest stone, and his leopard was back, those crystalline blue eyes staring at her. A muscle ticked in his jaw, drawing attention to the darker blond shadow there.
Touching her tongue to the bite mark on her lower lip, she stepped inside the cabin and knew instantly what Joshua had been talking about. Gatita went wild, throwing herself against the restraints put on her by Sonia's human form. Snarling. Clawing. Raking for freedom. She smelled blood and torture. She heard the walls screaming. Death was there. Sonia had to fight to keep the cat from shifting. It wasn't easy, but she kept a firm hold.
Sonia stumbled out of the cabin, and Joshua instantly caught her arm and pulled her into the shelter of his body. He wrapped his arms around her and put his chin on top of her head. She stayed there, unmoving, fighting back nausea, trying desperately to breathe through Gatita's raking claws. Joshua's hand stroked calming caresses down the back of her head, his fingers whispering through her hair.
It's all right now, they will take care of it.
Strangely, it wasn't Gatita's voice she heard. It was the male leopard calming his mate, pushing his message through Sonia, giving her the impression of Joshua and Sonia tearing apart the cabin. The big male believed in the man, and he wanted Gatita to believe in him as well.
No one had spoken to Gatita but her. No one else had known about her until Joshua had come to them that first night of the female's heat. Sonia had counted on her. The leopard had been her only companion these last few months. A part of her didn't like sharing. She pulled out of Joshua's arms.
"I see what you mean," she said, still shaken. To cover the fact that her stomach was still churning and her body trembling, she stepped off the porch to solid ground. "If I were you, I'd pull them all down. Most of them have rotted, from the outside looks of them. These were slave cabins. Get rid of them, and if you need smaller homes for your men to stay in while they're here, I'd choose the best locations and make slightly larger houses, ones with full kitchens, good bathrooms with showers so they're comfortable. You could have the one with the best view be your guesthouse and make that special."
"I thought it might just be my leopard that could feel that. Historical or not, they should come down. Like you said, most are falling down anyway, and they're unsafe. The few Cordeau renovated, he didn't keep the historical look at all." He fell into step beside her, reached out and took her hand so that they moved together, side by side, along the path, their hands linking them together.
She bit at her lip. Just walking with him made her feel exhilarated. The feeling added color to the already bursting colors in the swamp and groves. Everything about being with Joshua felt intense. That was more than scary to her. She needed someone to talk to.
You have me. Gatita sounded a little annoyed.
Maybe I do, but you're biased. All you can think about is having more sex with that male.
Gatita preened, purred and stretched languidly. That's what you're thinking about with your male.
It was true. So true, but Sonia wasn't giving her cat the satisfaction of agreeing. She kept walking, debating whether or not to pull her hand away. Glancing up at Joshua's set features, she decided against it. He was back to looking on the dangerous side.
"You don't have a poker face. I can read every thought in your whacked-out-way-of-thinking mind. You promised me you'd try. Now you're back to thinking about running."
She glared at him. "Don't read my mind if you don't like what I'm thinking."
"Baby"--he shook his head--"I'm reading your beautiful face, not your crazy mind."
She couldn't help wanting to smile, but she didn't. She had very real concerns, although she couldn't share what they were. "Has it occurred to you that I might be protecting you?"
He stared at her for a moment, his eyes back to that blue-green, all man. All dangerous. All hers. She blinked. She couldn't thi
nk that way.
"No, that never occurred to me," he admitted. "But given the fact that I'm beginning to realize just how fucked up your thinking is, I should have."
She gave him her blackest scowl. "My thinking is perfectly logical. Just because you don't have all the facts doesn't mean there aren't good reasons."
"So share."
She shook her head. "I don't know you well enough."
She was looking at him, so she saw the dangerous ice that crept into the lines carved deep into his face, but then he flashed a humorless smile. He looked more like a predator with prey in his sights than a man.
"All right, baby, you're going to get to know me rather fast. I'm known for my patience, but with you, I find I don't have that much. While you're renovating the rooms in my house, don't forget to include a nursery."
She yanked her hand from his. "You are the most annoying man I've ever met."
"I'm just getting started. I'll pick you up for dinner tonight at seven. Wear something nice."
"Can't. I've already got a date."
It was the wrong thing to say, and she knew it the moment the last word slipped out of her mouth. His fingers shackled her wrist and he pulled her in close. Before she could say anything, his mouth was on hers, one fist in her hair. His hand tightened there, pulling her head back, his kiss dark and demanding. Her scalp hurt, but in a good way, adding to the pleasure bursting through her.
Then he lifted her, one-armed, his mouth still on hers. She barely knew she was moving until he put her down again and his hand caught the hem of her tee, pulling it up as he lifted his mouth from hers. He yanked off her shirt and was kissing her again. The air hit her body and she shivered. She felt his hand brushing along her back and then her bra was gone and he cupped both breasts.
Sonia was breathing hard, opening her mouth to protest, to try to think beyond the scrambled brains in her head, but his mouth closed, hot and wet over her left breast, pulling the soft mound deep, his tongue stroking and flattening her nipple against the roof of his mouth. His fingers were on her right breast, massaging and kneading, tugging and rolling her nipple. There was nothing gentle about the way he claimed her, and she didn't want gentle. He seemed to know exactly what would send flames racing through her bloodstream.
His mouth worked her breast while his hand dropped to the front of her jeans. He opened the front and then his fingers were in her panties, pushing them down to her thighs right along with the denim.
"You're already so hot and slick for me," he murmured as he switched his attention to her right breast.
The air on her left breast, which was already wet and aching, added to the need building in her. His fingers filled her, plunging, curling to find that one spot that could send her into another orbit. He withdrew his fingers and held them up, his eyes suddenly hard and dangerous, so blue they were shocking. "This is mine. All for me. You fucking don't have dates with other men." He licked his fingers clean and then dropped to one knee, his mouth covering her slick center.
She heard the keening wail snaking through the trees, the one she couldn't stop as he ruthlessly lapped at her, used his teeth to rake at her clit, then his fingers to bring her close. His tongue was back, flicking and thrusting until she gripped his hair and held him there, needing. The intensity of her hunger was so strong the world around her blurred. Pleasure was so close. So close.
He pulled back abruptly.
"What are you doing?" She was practically sobbing. "Please. Joshua. I'm so close."
He stood up, yanking up her panties and jeans. "No. Absolutely not. Not like this."
Furious, she glared at him. "Do you think I need you to get off? Because I don't. You can't dictate that to me."
One eyebrow shot up. "Really? Because your hand or your vibrator is going to do to you what I can? How many times did you try these last three days and nights?"
She couldn't hold his gaze. She looked away, tears burning behind her eyes. "Maybe you can dictate to me," she admitted. "I hope that makes you feel great, because it makes me miserable. Truly miserable. That isn't giving you points, in case you wondered."
"Sonia." He waited.
She didn't want to look at him, but she couldn't stop herself. She knew he would see the tears swimming in her eyes. It was one more humiliation among so many. She hated that she had no control over her body, but that he did. He clearly didn't feel the same way about her that she did him.
He caught her chin. "I'm not going to excuse my temper by reminding you I'm leopard. That's no excuse, and in any case, I think the man is jealous all on his own without his leopard feeding him that. Just so you know, it was the most miserable three days and nights of my life. My hand didn't do any better than your toys." He tasted her tears with his lips. "Who is taking you out?"
She was silent for a moment, wondering why the abrupt change in him made her feel cared for. Safe even. He didn't have to tell her he'd suffered as well, but he gave that to her and it mattered.
"I'm hoping it isn't a friend of mine, because I'd have to let my leopard hunt." There was a small teasing note in is voice, but she was leopard and she heard the half-truth there.
"My friend Molly is coming over for dinner tonight at seven, not that it's any of your business."
"Woman, you are truly exasperating. We just agreed we were going to get to know each other so you're more comfortable with the mate idea, but you know you're mine. You agreed. You carry my mark. You carry my leopard's mark. Leopards don't take well to their mates being around other men, especially other male leopards."
"I don't know your rules."
"The rules are in place so no one gets killed. Have fun with your friend Molly, and I'll come over after she leaves. We'll go over the rules then."
She wasn't certain having him in her space was a particularly good idea. If things didn't work out, she might not be able to cleanse her home of his presence. She wasn't even certain she liked him, but she loved his body and she loved the things he could do to her body. She was in way over her head.
"Would you rather come to my home?"
She shook her head immediately. "I have to work here. I have to face those men every day. I don't want them to know . . ."
"They know." His voice said it all. It was a decree. "They were told you were my mate and to stay the hell away from you."
That was why the men had barely looked at her, let alone flirted. He'd given them an order, and they'd obeyed. He was definitely the boss. If any of the others were leopard, then he was their leader. She didn't know leopards had leaders, but the men had done as he'd told them.
"You scare me. What happens between us scares me."
"I'll take that into consideration when handling you and the crazy way you think. I would really like it if you could take into consideration everything you know of leopards and their temperaments."
"Leopards don't mate for life. Females raise the young alone. In fact, male leopards have been known to kill the cubs." She couldn't keep the accusation out of her voice. She was still trembling, still hot, hating that her bra was on the ground with her shirt and she was standing half naked in front of him. Glancing down, there were those marks again, the way he'd scraped his teeth over her skin, the way he'd sucked until there was a bright strawberry. She refused to reach down and get her clothes to cover up.
"Shifters mate for life. We raise our young, Sonia. I mate for life with my woman and I certainly intend to raise my children with her." He reached down and gathered up her bra and shirt. He put one finger in the air and spun it in a circle, indicating for her to turn around.
She hesitated, but he didn't offer her clothes to her, so she reluctantly turned her back on him. He reached around her with her lacy bra and fit it over her breasts. "I hate to cover something this beautiful up, but you're already going to drive the men crazy. I don't need them looking at your body." He fit the hooks together and then pulled her T-shirt over her head.
She took a couple of steps forward before t
urning to face him again. Her gaze swept his body. At least he had a hard-on. The front of his jeans was pushed out and she could see the outline of his package, thick and long, straining the denim. She was grateful she wasn't the only one having a difficult time with what had occurred. Her sex clenched, and hot liquid dampened her panties. She was slick with need. Aching. She stepped farther away from temptation, putting space between them, not wanting to pull his scent into her lungs.
He moved with blurring speed. She knew leopards were fast, but his speed was astonishing and disconcerting. He was on her before she had processed that he was coming at her. His hand cupped her chin. "Tonight, Sonia. I'll take care of you tonight and we'll talk this thing out. In the meantime, I would appreciate you texting me when your friend leaves."
"I don't have your cell number." His thumb was rubbing across her lips and she could barely think again. She hated that she was that susceptible to him when he could think so clearly.
His hand slid into her back pocket where she kept her cell phone, pulled it out and handed it to her. "Put in your code and give it to me. I'll program my number in. Then you send me yours."
Her head screamed "no" but she found herself doing exactly as he'd asked--no, not asked. He'd told her. Still, even knowing that, she sent him her number when he handed her phone back.
"When you come up with the estimates for the main house, and the cabins separately, have Jerry send them to me."
She nodded. At least she hadn't lost the job for Jerry.
They skirted around the house, taking a path that led to the front, where her truck was parked. He walked with her. Close. His hand brushing hers. Fingers tangling. Gripping. He pulled her hand to his thigh. She didn't pull away.
When they reached her truck, he opened the door and trapped her between his body and the seat. "Kiss me." It was an order.
"I don't dare." She told the truth. Her body was already in full meltdown.
"I need you to kiss me."
"Joshua." She knew it was a weak protest.
The hand holding her palm to his thigh moved, pressed it over the hard length of him. "You aren't understanding me, baby. I need you to kiss me. I always feel as if I'm on the verge of losing you. I did lose you for three fucking days. I counted the damn minutes. You kiss me so I know you're with me, suffering the way I am. Thinking about me the way I'm thinking about you. I haven't slept in three nights, and that's the truth. I needed your body curled up in my bed, my body wrapped around yours. Don't know when I'll get sleep, but it has to be soon. You get me? It has to be soon."