“I somehow doubt either you or Lucas put up with that.”
“We sneaked out all the time. Lucas even stole into my room to stay with me some nights. I think he thought he could fight off the old man when the booze finally made him brave enough to pull out his fists.” He hadn’t meant to admit to that part, so he shut up. But he thought about the other reason Lucas sneaked into his room. His arrogance had been strong, even back then, and he’d thought he could stop the nightmares of Snow’s mother just by being there. And when that hadn’t worked, he’d done just as he had the other night. He’d crawled into Snow’s bed and held him.
Jude was quiet a long time before he asked. “Were the two of you lovers?”
“No. Just brothers.” He stared at Jude, who gave him a sweet smile as he held out another forkful of food. He’d had one sexual experience with Lucas but it hadn’t been lover-like in the least so he didn’t feel like he was lying.
They shared the mac and cheese until Snow held up a hand and groaned. “No more.” He rolled onto his back. The fork clattered as Jude set the dish on the small table next to his bed/couch. He scooched down under the cover and propped up on his side. Nerves tore through Snow’s stomach. He’d never talked so much to someone in bed before, never shared that much of his past. Jude reached out and cupped his cheek, his expression far too serious.
Snow took in the black stubble already filling the man’s square jaw, the dark eyes staring at him. He needed to lighten up the mood. For Jude’s sake. The man was wearing his empathy for Snow’s pain like a noose. Snow pushed him onto his back and rolled on top of him, the corner of his mouth going up. Jude’s hair was so thick and messy, it looked like it was trying to escape his head. He bet Jude looked cute in the mornings all sleepy with his escape hair. He should stay through morning this time, wake up to all this scruffy warmth. “Feel like proving you don’t have an allergy to my dick?”
Jude nodded as he slowly grinned. “Oh yeah, General, but first, let’s see if we can get creative in a small, wet space.”
By the time they crashed back under the covers, Jude had not only proved he didn’t have an allergy, but he’d probably managed to work off every bite of that damn mac and cheese.###
“What the hell, doc? It’s two o’clock in the morning. You’re taking this new friendship to places I don’t wanna go.” Hollis’s voice, low and gritty with sleep, rumbled over the line.
Snow patted his pocket and realized he must have dropped his keys somewhere. “Hold on a second,” he said into the phone before quietly moving back into the apartment. He’d called Hollis in the stairwell. The temperature had finally warmed in the room and he could see one of Jude’s long, bare, muscled legs out of the covers—his foot dangling off the edge of the bed.
“Really?”
The disbelieving growl came from his phone and he ignored it as he searched for his keys. He hesitated only when Jude shifted on the bed. Snow walked over to see that he’d rolled toward the spot Snow had left, his arm out as if he’d been searching for Snow in his sleep. His thick, dark hair was already sticking up all over the place and Snow couldn’t stop his small smile. Jude had mentioned after their shower how much he hated the way the black strands took on a mind of their own during the night, but Snow found it…sweet. He rolled his eyes, kind of disgusted with himself. But he couldn’t help the thought and it was one that came often now. His heart sort of stuttered. He wanted to crawl back into that warm bed, curl around all those warm muscles, and stroke his fingers through that crazy hair. He’d wanted to wake with him as he’d planned.
Gidget’s call changed those plans.
For a moment, he thought about waking him to tell him what he was doing. When he realized he was hesitating over fear for Jude’s safety, he backed away from the bed. Jude had been put into danger enough because of him.
“Doc?” Hollis yelled from the phone he still held by his hip.
Snow couldn’t answer. He was too busy trying not to pass out over the knowledge creeping into his mind. He had fallen for Jude. Hard. He was completely, head-over-heels in love with the man.
“Doc, you there or what? It’s two in the morning and I was getting my first night of sleep in days.”
Being on the phone with the annoying cop while realizing his life was about to change amused him enough to snap him out of it. He spotted his keys, grabbed them, hesitated, then grabbed Jude’s. After one last glance at the man sleeping in the bed, he made sure the apartment was locked behind him. He hit the stairwell, jogged down and ran toward his car. Jude had been thoughtful enough to swing by Lucas’s first to allow him to get his car so Snow wouldn’t feel trapped at Jude’s. The man was far too perceptive at times.