I didn’t wait for her reply because it didn’t matter if she agreed or not. We were past that point. I grabbed her wrists in one hand and began pushing them up when Leona finally sprang into action. She screamed, “No”, and fought against my hold, her hips bucking, legs kicking, but it was no use. I shoved her wrists hard against the floor. She gasped in pain. Damn it. Playing rough was difficult without actually hurting. I loosened my hold, knowing it wouldn’t be noticeable on camera. I squeezed her breasts through her dress, then moved lower and pushed my hand below her skirt. I was glad she’d allowed me to touch and see her before, so this wouldn’t be her first experience.
“No, please don’t! Please!” she cried, so convincing that something ugly and heavy settled in my stomach. This was why Soto had been responsible for that part of the job.
“Shut up, you whore!” I snarled.
Hurt settled in her eyes. I breathed heavily. I could not take my eyes off her face, off those cornflower blue eyes, off those damn freckles. She held my gaze and I hers. One second. Two seconds. I couldn’t do this, not even in pretend. I felt fucking sick to my stomach. Fuck. I’d cut men into tiny pieces, had done so many horrible things that had never bothered me, but this…this I could not do. Not for real. Not for show. Never.
I let go of her wrists. Her brows puckered. I lowered my head until my forehead rested against hers, and she released a small breath, then lifted her hand and touched my cheek.
I wasn’t sure how much of it the camera recorded. I didn’t care.
“Fabiano?”
I wasn’t sure if I could save her, save us, after this. I pulled away and straightened before I helped her to her feet. She clutched my arm, still shaking.
“What’s going to happen now?” she whispered.
Remo wanted blood. He wanted confirmation that I was his soldier, that I was capable of doing what must be done. He wanted to see my monster. And he would.
Leona would hate me for it.
Chapter Nineteen
We headed upstairs. Remo was waiting for us. Nino was there too, and at his feet cowered Hall, tape over his mouth but still very much alive. Leona stiffened, but my grip on her arm kept her at my side. I wasn’t sure if she’d tried to run toward him otherwise.
Remo regarded Leona from head to toe. He knew. Had known before he’d laid eyes on her. Leona trembled against me.
That Nino was here told me two things. One: Remo thought he needed reinforcing and that reinforcing wasn’t going to be me. Second: That reinforcing wasn’t going to be me because he thought he needed reinforcing against me.
I released Leona but gave her a look that made it clear she needed to stay where she was. She understood.
I walked toward Remo. He didn’t rise from where he perched on the desk but the look he gave me was one he only ever leveled on his opponents in the cage.
“So,” he said tightly. “You didn’t handle her.”
“I didn’t handle her because he is the one I should handle.” I nodded toward Hall. “Since when do we let out debtors get away with shit? Since when do we let their daughters or wives pay for their crimes? Since when, Remo?” I was very close to him now, and finally he stood, bringing us to eyelevel.
“Since the moment I decided she was going to pay for her father. My word is law.”
“It is law,” I confirmed fiercely. “Because you are Capo. My Capo, and I’ve always followed your command, because you taught me the true meaning of honor and loyalty and pride.” I took another step toward him so we were almost touching. “But there’s nothing honorable about making an innocent woman pay for her father’s debts, Remo.”
His dark eyes pierced into mine. I knew Nino was watching, probably with a hand on his gun. “We don’t spare women.”
“No, we don’t spare women who are indebted to us, because they brought it upon themselves. They knew what they were getting themselves into when they asked for money. But this is different and you know it. I don’t know why you feel the need to test my loyalty like that, but I ask you to reconsider. There’s no reason for you to doubt me. Leona is only one woman. She means nothing to me. You are like my brother.”
“Are you sure about that?” he asked in a low murmur. “Because when you look at her she isn’t just one woman.”
My chest constricted. “I’m loyal to you, to the Camorra, to our cause.”
“Someone will have to bleed for this,” he said, and he settled back on the desk. Relief washed over me.
“And I will make him bleed for you.”