I wasn’t the savior she’d hoped for. She took another step in my direction, then stopped, looking at me with fucking hopeful eyes. Slowly the hope disappeared. “Fabiano?” she asked in the barest whisper.
I shut off my fucking useless feelings. I would be dead without Remo. Everything I was today was thanks to him. He’d saved me. I could not try to kill him, not even for Leona. And trying would be all it was. Remo was as strong as me, and he still had his brothers at his side.
I stalked toward Leona, and for the first time she backed off. When her back hit the wall, I was in front of her. I pressed my body against hers, caging her in, and sunk my nose into her hair. The camera only would make it look like I was cornering her. Her sweet flowery scent reached my nose.
“Fabiano?” she murmured. Hesitantly she put her hands on my waist as if she wasn’t sure if she should hug me. That would have been the end of everything. Fuck, but I wanted to wrap my arms around her. Nothing more.
Fuck me. Fuck us.
“I told you I’m not good,” I said quietly.
She peered up into my eyes, and I knew what she would see, exactly what I needed her to see to be convincing. Leona started trembling against me, fear eating away at what little hope was left. I pulled her arms away from my waist, grabbed her wrists and pinned them atop her head against the wall. I cornered her with my body and she allowed it. She let out a choked whimper, expression uncomprehending. She should have fought by now. This broken-hearted surrender was something I couldn’t handle. There was still that stupid fucking hope. It was worse than begging and crying. Worse than anything had ever been because it meant she still believed there was more to me than the cold-hearted killer.
Perhaps she still didn’t understand what I was supposed to do to her.
I pressed my lips against her ear. “I can’t spare you. We’re being watched. If I don’t do it, Soto will and I can’t allow that.”
Her fear widened eyes stared up at me. “Because you don’t share, right?” she whispered miserably.
I wished it were only that. “Because Soto will break you.”
“And you won’t?”
We’d been talking for too long already. Every second that passed could seal both our fate.
“As a woman you are granted a choice unlike men. You can pay with your blood as a man would have to, or with your body,” I said sharply. I’d only spoken those damn words once before, and never again after that. Remo had handed over the task to Soto because I fucking couldn’t do it. He allowed me that one fucking weakness.
She raised her chin and I knew she considered choosing the first option because she’d rather suffer through pain than become like her mother. Damn it. “Leona,” I whispered, leaning into her again, surprised by the despair in my voice. Careful, Fabiano.
You are my Enforcer.
“Choose two. I can fake that one but not the other.”
Confusion filled her face.
“Choose the second option,” I murmured again.
“Two,” she said, resigned. Still not understanding what I had offered.
She started crying softly. I watched the tears make their silent descend over her soft freckles. Her eyes held mine, and then just like that, she nodded. “Do what you have to do.”
I’d wanted her from the first second I’d laid eyes on her, had wanted to be the one to rip her innocence from her, wanted to posses her in every way possible. But not like this, not in front of a fucking camera, not hard and fast, and brutally as Remo expected. Was she worth the risk?
The Camorra was my family. My life.
In my darkest hour Remo had been there to pick me up. He had showed me my worth. He could have killed me. He was a monster, but so was I.
Leona held my gaze. And I made my own decision. Fuck it. “I try not to hurt you. Fight me and cry. It has to look real,” I whispered harshly.
Confusion filled her eyes.
I shook her wrists and tightened my hold. “Play your part or we are both screwed.”
I gave her a warning look, then gripped her hips and threw her down on the mattress in the corner. She let out a terrified scream that bounced off the walls. I didn’t give her time to recover. This needed to be convincing. I hoped the long wait in the beginning hadn’t already raised Remo’s suspicions, because I knew he was watching. I climbed on top off her, pinning her down with my taller body. My mouth was back at her ears. “Trust me. Because from now on I’ll have to look the monster I am with everyone else. Now fight me with all you have.”