“Or else?”
There’s something incredibly sexy about the way she looks at me over her shoulder. She’s done it several times, and each time I think my heart trips over its next beat.
A tiny smile, that appears to hold a secret, curls her lips. “If I stay, I might forget I’m not supposed to want you to kiss me.”
Not just one beat. My heart trips over the next five beats, making it hard to breathe and impossible to speak.
CHAPTER TEN
Gracelyn
I’m not drunk, yet I stumble home, up the stairs, and into my bedroom. Collapsing onto the bed, I hug my left arm to my chest, letting my right thumb and forefinger massage the clasp to the white gold bracelet that’s easily hidden by my watch.
“Say something,” I whisper, closing my eyes. “You should have something to say about Nate. So just … say it.”
Brandon doesn’t say a word. I know he’s thinking all kinds of things like how I have no business having any sort of intimate thoughts about a man who is leaving in two months. I’ve managed to ruin all of my relationships since Brandon died. I know he’s thinking shit about that. He told me to find a worthy opponent, but I’ve failed. He was my worthy opponent. I have to believe he’s waiting for me in my next life.
However, right now, in this life, it’s hard to not feel this pull to Nathaniel Hunt—especially when he looks at me like Brandon used to look at me and when he says he wants to kiss me.
Gah!
I want to be kissed by him. Just once. Would it count if it were one kiss? Would it have to mean something more than just a kiss? A grin takes over my face, thinking about his smile when he said it. The way his shoulders hugged his ears, giving off a boyish vibe even with some gray peppered along his scruffy jaw.
“Elvis, we’re back. And we have dessert,” Mr. Hans yells from downstairs.
I expected privacy—the upstairs being an apartment. Instead, my landlord yells like my dad, and the neighbor girl practically lives here. And for some reason I love it. They feel like family, and I think both Gabe and I need that right now. It won’t last. Morgan and Nate will go home to Wisconsin, and eventually I will need to find a place to raise Gabe that doesn’t involve a shared kitchen.
I miss Gabe when he’s not here. While I’ve always loved him, I don’t remember feeling like I missed him when I lived in Idaho. It didn’t take long to feel like he’s mine—maybe not my son, but my responsibility and mine to love in a way that feels deeper than I loved him before. The kind of love that makes me miss him when he’s not here.
“Did you hear Mr. Hans?” Morgan pokes her head into my bedroom. Yep, no privacy.
I grin, not moving an inch from my spot on the bed. “Yes. I heard him. Thanks.”
“What are you doing?” She plops her butt onto the edge of the bed and lies back next to me.
What am I doing? Great question. I’m missing Gabe and his parents for that matter. I’m listening for my dead boyfriend’s voice. And I’m thinking about your dad kissing me. I’m sure she’d love for me to say all of this aloud, but I don’t.
Instead, I roll toward her and she rolls toward me.
“What was it like traveling the world for so many years instead of being in school like your peers?”
Her lips twist as her eyes roll to the side for a few seconds. “Hmmm … I don’t know. I’ve never been in public school. We left Wisconsin when I was two. Traveling the world is all I’ve ever known. I’m excited to just be normal for once, but Dad thinks I’ll feel trapped. I think I’m going to find a boyfriend and lots of girlfriends to talk to about my boyfriend. I want to fall in love.”
I grin. “You’re ten.”
She lifts a shoulder. “My dad was younger than me when he met Daisy.”
“Daisy?”
“Yes. The first girl he loved. She died. And he named me after her—Morgan Daisy.”
I let that play in my mind a few moments. Nate lost his wife and he named their child after his first love. Interesting.
“Your dad said you’d like him to find someone so he’s not lonely when you go to college. Did he …” I bite my bottom lip while searching for the right way to ask this. “Did he ever have a friend—a female friend—while you were traveling?”
“Like a girlfriend?”
I grin. “Yeah.”
“No.”
I nod slowly.
“Do you like my dad? I think he likes you. Or at least he likes looking at you and giving you a special smile. We’re not staying here and you’re not moving to Wisconsin, so I think he thinks you’re a bad choice to be his girlfriend.”