Twisted God

I’m a freak.

I love two people and two people love me.

Ivy is my firefly. The soft curves to my hard edges. Ethan, my strength. He dominates my body and soothes my soul.

Together we became our own constellation. Shining brighter because of each other.

But it could never last.

I ran because I don’t deserve them.

I punish myself because I’ll never be enough.

I’m breaking because I have to hide how I feel and pretend to be someone I’m not.

My behavior will bring shame on the band.

I can’t do that to them.

To any of them.

So, instead, I will live a lie and stay silent.

Except my silence is deafening and I’m drowning in it.

And I don’t think that even their love is strong enough to pull me to safety.