Obviously love did have its boundaries, because, if he’d asked her to come with him, she would. Maybe he wasn’t ready for the family life; maybe he was too set in his ways in L.A.; maybe he enjoyed living freely without being tied down to one woman and a baby.
Glancing down at Abby, Raine knew there was no way she’d give up this baby. But giving up this house, the farm—she’d sacrifice all that for Max.
“I need to get to the theater since tonight’s performance starts earlier,” he said. “My mom and dad are coming. Maybe you’d like to see if Sasha could watch Abby and come sit in the front row one last time?”
As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t. Nothing would compare to the other night when they’d made love in his dressing room, had dinner on the stage. She wanted that memory to be the last one in the theater, because she doubted she’d ever step foot in there again.
“I can’t,” she told him. “It’s better this way.”
Max nodded. “So, this is it? Are we saying goodbye here?”
Too choked up with emotion to speak, Raine bit her quivering lip and nodded.
Max placed his hands on either side of her face and forced her to look him in the eye. “I do love you, Raine. Never doubt that. And if you ever need me, just call.”
She needed him now. She needed him to stay, to be her rock and her partner. But it wasn’t fair to ask him to give up his life in L.A. for Lenox.
“I want...” Max stopped, shook his head and dropped his hands. “Will you call me? Keep me updated on Abby and how you’re doing?”
“Sure.” God, this was lame. “I’ll let you know when the adoption goes through.”
He stared at her another minute, then he turned, squatted down to a sleeping Abby and kissed her forehead. “Take care of your mommy for me, little one.”
Raine nearly threw her arms around him and begged him to stay, but she held herself in place as Max spared her one last glance over his shoulder.
“Goodbye, Raine.”
“Bye, Max.”
And he was gone.
Raine couldn’t hold herself together another second. The dam burst, and she buried her head in her hands, resting her elbows on the wooden bench.
How could a heart be ripped apart so many times in one life and still keep beating?
She would get past this; she knew she was strong...and that she had so much to live for. After all, she still had Abby. She’d wanted a baby for years, and here she was a mother. So she had to look to the blessings she had and find a reason to smile again.
And she would...eventually. But right now, she wanted to throw a self-pity party and feel sorry for all she’d lost.
How would she ever be able to look at pictures of Max in the media or see a movie starring him and not remember how those hands had felt on her body? How he’d gone to her parents and taken up for her—and Abby? How he’d looked with tears in his eyes as he had told her goodbye—
When a large hand brushed across her arm, Raine jumped and turned to see Max. His coat was covered with snow, as was his hair.
“What are you doing?” she sniffed, embarrassed he’d caught her having a breakdown.
“I fell,” he said with a smile. “Literally. Bess and Lulu came running out and tripped me. Then the chickens joined in.”
Raine smiled at the mental image, then reached up to touch his face. “Are you hurt?” she asked.
Max gripped her hands and held them between his icy ones. “Yes. I’m miserable. I said goodbye two minutes ago, and I can’t handle it, Raine. How will I live across the country knowing my heart is here?”
Hope spread through her. Please, please, please, let him be saying he wants more.
“I don’t care where we live,” he said. “If I have to live on the farm and fly to L.A. when necessary, then I will. Or if you want to sell and move, we’ll do that. I just can’t leave, Raine. I can’t leave you.”
She threw her arms around him, not caring about the snow wetting her long-sleeved T-shirt. She squeezed him, never wanting to let him go.
“What made you change your mind?” she asked as she eased back.
“When your crazy goats tripped me, I laughed. I mean, how could I leave here? I love everything about it. I want to make a home with you and Abby, if you’ll let me. I know that may take more time in the courts for me to be her adoptive father, but—”
“You’re serious?” Raine asked. “You want to be her father?”
Max bent down and captured Raine’s lips in a soul-searing kiss. “And your husband.”
Raine squealed, waking Abby. “Oops,” she said, laughing.
“Let me get her,” Max offered.
He lifted her from the bouncy seat and rested her against his dry shoulder. “I have the two most beautiful girls in the world,” he said, wrapping his wet arm around Raine. “Nothing is more important than this right here.”
“But what about the film you’re going to start shooting?” she asked.
“You can come with me for a bit until you need to be back for your Farmer’s Market.”
“You’re not embarrassed that I like to make and sell my own things? I mean, you can purchase whatever you want, and I’m scraping by here.”
“You have a career you enjoy, Raine. I would never take that from you.”
Raine smiled up at him. “I love you.”
Max kissed her forehead. “I love you, too. Now, we need to add some livestock to this farm and get this house fixed up.”
“To sell?” she asked.
“Sell? Hell, no, we’re not selling. We can keep a place on each coast. I have a feeling we’ll be traveling a lot, because I’m going to spend as much time with you as humanly possible. I’m also going to want more babies.”
Raine laughed. “You really want it all. Amazing you got all of that from Bess and Lulu tripping you.”
“I fell for you long ago, Raine. I know when I have a good thing, and I don’t plan on ever letting go.” Max slid his arm around her, pulling her in tight against his chest. “I plan on holding both of my girls forever.”