“That’s better,” Jessica says.
“I can’t wait,” I gush. “So, when are you coming?”
“Is tomorrow soon enough?” she says.
Just then, the bedroom door opens, and Brad pokes his head in.
“Are you all right?” he says. He looks adorable in his apron. Just looking at him makes my thighs tingle. I want to jump on him and grind my body against his. That’s what Brad does to me.
Instead, I grin. “Yes. Jessica is coming to visit.”
A grin splits his face. “Wonderful, I can’t wait to meet her.” He blows me a kiss and shuts the door behind him.
Jessica and I wind up the conversation after I get all her travel details. She insists on taking an Uber from the airport, and I give her the address.
***
“Thanks, dinner was delicious,” I tell Brad as I wipe the sides of my mouth. I stand up and carry the dirty dishes to the sink.
“You’re welcome. I love cooking. It helps me to destress,” Brad says. He helps me carry the rest of the dishes to the sink.
Isaac goes into the living room to watch some TV while Brad and I clean up.
“What are you stressed about?” I ask him.
He doesn’t answer immediately. “The usual life stuff,” he finally says.
A painful tightness comes over my throat. Brad is shutting me out. It brings back terrible memories of Clay. He liked to play those kinds of games. Insist he was fine, but his behavior indicated otherwise.
We wash the rest of the dishes in silence.
“How about a glass of wine?” I suggest afterward. Maybe the wine will loosen him up.
He frowns. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. What if the court evaluator comes?”
My jaw drops, and I stare at him in disbelief. “At night?”
“We were told he could come at any time,” Brad says. He’s dead serious.
At that, I explode. All the hurt and resentment I’d been keeping at bay all day pour out. “You’ve been a complete ass all day! You wouldn’t even let Isaac and I have a little fun at the party.”
“We stayed for three hours!” Brad hisses. “I didn’t want the evaluator to come and find no one home.”
“Then he’ll come back another time!” I hiss back. “That’s what people do when they arrive somewhere unannounced and find no one home.”
“Mila, this is important.”
He fuels my fire further. “You don’t think I know that? But we can’t stop living because of the custody case. Life must go on. We can even have a little fun while we’re at it.”
Brad looks at me, his jaw clenched. He does not want to understand. “Look, my priority at this time is the custody case. That’s why we got married.”
His words are like a knife to my chest. I stagger back slightly. Brad moves as if to come to me, but I hold a hand up to ward him off. His words hurt worse than a blow would. I feel used. As if there’s nothing between us at all.
“Fine. I’m going to my house for the evening. I need time to myself,” I manage to say without bursting into tears.
Jessica was right, and I’m a fool. It’s true that somewhere inside me, I’m harboring hopes that Brad will fall in love with me and see how perfect we are for each other. Marrying him has had the opposite effect. He doesn’t see me as a person.
To him, I’m the vessel that will win the custody case for him. What is it with me and men? I hold myself together while I kiss Isaac good night and make an excuse about needing something in my rented house.
Tears blind me as I leave the house. Outside, it’s quiet, and on the other side of the street, homes are lit up as families spend the evening together. I feel alone and unloved. I belong nowhere.
I do what I do when in distress. I head to the studio and immerse myself in work. Every so often, the pain forces its way through, and I stop painting to take huge breaths in. I tell myself that I’ve always managed well on my own and that this time will be no different.
I will do as promised and help Brad win the custody case. He’s a good father and has done an awesome job raising Isaac. No one should take that away from him.
I can do this, I tell myself. The only problem is that this time I’ve tasted heaven. I now know what it feels like to be part of a loving family. To have a good man in my life. It’s not going to be easy to move on, but I will. I’m tough that way.
Chapter 23
Brad
I give up on falling asleep, roll onto my back, and stare at the ceiling. I’m seething and still can’t believe Mila’s attitude. Why can’t she understand the stakes? I could lose my son! Brenda could end up with Isaac. I break into a cold sweat at the thought of my ex-wife winning custody of our son. She has no interest in him. The only reason she wants him is to please her new husband. Isaac deserves better than that. He deserves to be raised by people who love him. If Mila understood that, she would not be angry that I want to do everything I can possibly do to impress the court evaluator.