The spring mornings were a lot warmer and more fragrant, with the smell of jasmine scenting the air, than those few mornings she had shared on the porch with Harris. But that didn’t make her miss him less. Instead she often wished he were there to enjoy the changing temperature and the spring blossoms with her.
For a second, she contemplated not going out after all. Feeling raw after last night’s confusing conversation with Harris. But she shook her head, determined not to let his odd behavior spoil this one perfect moment in her day.
Greyson was sitting on the porch steps, his back to her, and she shut her eyes, not in the mood to see the near-exact physical replica of the man she loved.
It had taken a long time for Tina to admit to that love, but she had come home one night after dinner service, lonely and missing him with everything in her. And it had simply been there: a quiet acknowledgment of the undeniable truth.
Of course she loved him. Why else would she miss him so much? Why else would she yearn for his company, the touch of his hands on her body, the whisper of his voice in her ear?
She loved him. She had for a long time . . . and she would for the rest of her life.
For so long she had tried to protect herself from strong emotions, from the pain that loving and losing someone could cause. She had cut herself off from those who cared about her and then believed herself inherently flawed and no longer capable of experiencing true depth of feeling.
But what she hadn’t recognized was that all those past experiences—the pain and loss, the humiliation and anguish—had forged her into someone strong enough to love with everything in her.
When she thought of the times Harris had told her he loved her, she felt searing regret that she had believed herself incapable of responding in kind. When all along there had been this wealth of love simmering mere inches below the surface.
She stepped out onto the porch and sat down on her swing.
“Morning, Greyson,” she said, hoping he would gather, from her subdued tone of voice, that she was not feeling sociable.
“Greyson? Has it really been that long, Bean?” Her head jerked up at that unmistakable gruff voice, and her grip on the coffee mug slackened enough for it to list to the side.
“Watch the coffee,” he warned sharply, and she jerked her hand upright, fortunately not spilling any of the hot liquid. She thumped the mug down onto the seat and surged to her feet all in one motion.
“Harris!” She couldn’t keep the absolute shock, wonder, and joy out of her voice, and for a moment all she could do was stare at him as he slowly pushed himself upright before turning fully to face her. The rising sun behind him cast his body into silhouette, and she couldn’t read his expression.
She couldn’t hide her complete confusion at his unexpected presence on her front porch, not sure what this meant. Her arms crept around her torso as she held herself, longing to go to him but uncertain of his reception after their last phone call.
Harris could barely contain his joy at the sight of her. So familiar and adorable in her pajamas and robe. She looked shocked, unsure, and a little fearful as she hugged herself tightly. He recognized the gesture. She’d been doing it since she was a child, and Harris hadn’t realized the significance of it until now.
She was self-soothing. Hugging herself because she rarely allowed others close enough to do it for her. He shook his head. And strode toward her.
That was damned well going to end right now.
Tina watched in shock as Harris closed the distance between them in just a few short steps and wrapped his arms around her without hesitation. He enfolded her in his protective embrace while he whispered soft reassurances into her hair. She burst into happy tears, relishing the closeness. She felt loved and protected and so, so relieved to be in his arms again.
“You’re here,” she sobbed. “You’re here. I’ve missed you.”
“I missed you, too, Bean,” he muttered, his voice thick. His arms tightened around her, and for a long moment they simply held each other. Content with just this wonderful moment of intimacy for now.
“You hung up on me,” she accused after the initial storm had passed, and he circled his hands around her upper arms before gently moving her away from his body so that he could look into her eyes.
“I didn’t want to waste a single moment more on that damned phone. Not when I had such a long drive ahead of me. I needed to leave as soon as possible if I was going to make it in time to watch the sunrise with you.”