He tugged on my hand and walked through the place, which had to be five-thousand square feet, and had a second floor. The terrace alone had to be six-hundred square feet with a built-in brick fireplace. It was the library that stole my breath away. Floor-to-ceiling shelves lined the walls, and although they were empty, the deep mahogany wood contrasted against the cool grey marble floors giving it a modern, yet old-world feel. One entire wall had an inlaid seat against the window with soft cream cushions.
“Private space,” Crisis said, standing at the door while I walked around, sliding my finger along the wood shelves. “You can do your homework here. Kind of like your own place to hang.”
I laughed and then stopped short when I saw his expression. He was locked on me, eyes watching, and there was desire smoldering. I liked it. I liked his eyes on me and I never thought I’d enjoy that after the club. I never thought I’d want a guy to touch me ever again. “Crisis, I don’t need a library. All I need is a bedroom. And this place is too much. I feel like if I breathe, I’ll break something.”
“What, the marble floors?” He stepped away from the door chuckling and I followed after him.
“You know what’s missing?” Dana called from the patio. “A pool. Where’s the pool?”
“Downstairs,” Kite said, then sat on one of the stools around the island in the state-of-the-art kitchen.
She rolled her eyes. “Oh. Well, isn’t that a pain in the ass to have to share with other residents.”
I followed Crisis up an iron spiral staircase to an open area. He pointed to a door. “That will be the gym. And the next room’s mine. The one on the other side is Kite’s and across the hall is a guest room. Each of us have our own bathroom and they’re pretty much exactly the same.” He walked me down a hall. “And this is yours.”
I stared at the enormous space with windows on two walls and a private balcony. Crisis opened a door on the left. “Bathroom with a soaker,” he said grinning.
I backed out. “No. I can’t afford this.” It was overwhelming. Way too much. I expected a nice place, but this . . . this wasn’t a place I could imagine myself in. God, all I imagined was Crisis and I in the soaker tub together, naked with his arms wrapped around me as I leaned back against him while he nuzzled the side of my neck, then licked the slight moisture clinging to my skin. Jesus, what the hell was wrong with me?
“Babe,” Crisis called as I escaped and went back downstairs. “Haven.” I heard him come after me and he caught my arm before I reached the elevator. “It’s just four walls.”
“Yeah, with marble floors, four bathrooms and a library. Crisis, it has a library.” Kite and Dana joined us. “You guys can do whatever you want, but I don’t want to live in a museum.” And I was scared. I hated being scared. I’d been able to lock that away with everything else for so long, but what I felt for Crisis . . . it terrified me because I didn’t know what to do with it.
“Christ, it’s not a museum.” Crisis crossed his arms, leaned back against the wall to block the button for the elevator. “It’s big, yeah, but we won’t be tripping over one another. The security is top of the line and no fans are getting past them. No attention, Haven. It’s what you want. You won’t have to worry about it here. If reporters ever find out we’re in the building, they won’t even get up to the front walkway before security is on them.” He glanced at Kite as if for help.
Kite piped in. “You tell Ream you’re looking to move out?”
I shook my head. “No.” I had mentioned it at one point, but that was after I was done school and had a job.
“Then when the shit hits the fan, he may be a little more reasonable knowing you’re safe here and it’s close to school. Makes sense for you to move in.”
Kite had a good point. It didn’t solve the issue of the imagery plastered in my mind and screwing with my control.
“We move next week,” Crisis said, shoving off the wall and turning to press the button.
“You bought it already?” I asked. And this was when I felt panic, because that meant he was leaving the farm. It meant I wouldn’t see him every day. It meant I’d lose what we had.
“Yeah. So, tell your brother and start packing,” Crisis said.
Oh. He sounded pissed off and I didn’t like that I was the cause.
“Wow!” Dana stood frozen, staring at me. “We are so hanging at your place from now on.”
The elevator doors opened and Crisis and Dana walked in. I went to follow when Kite snagged my arm, leaned in and in a low tone said, “He’s been dying to show you this place for weeks.”
My gaze darted to Crisis and I realized he’d been excited. He’d taken my hand and pulled me along like a kid in a candy store. And I was shooting him down at every opportunity when I had no right to. I’d ruined it for him.
This place made sense for me. Crisis had taken what I said to heart and found a place where I was close to school, a job and had the privacy and safety of security in place.
Shit. I was a bitch. I was okay with being a bitch to other people, people I didn’t care about, but not to Crisis. He was good to me. No, it was more than that, much more. But what I was feeling would ease just like the memories of my past.
“Okay. I’ll move in.” Except, the memories hadn’t faded and despite what I was trying to convince myself, I didn’t think what I was feeling for Crisis would either.