I look back over my shoulder and laugh at his blank expression. “Please tell me that you understand that reference.”
He shakes his head.
Bless his sweet heart. “I meant that … you know what, don’t worry,” I say, letting out a sigh and focusing back on the books. I take a few steps, scanning over the titles and figuring out what I haven’t had a chance to read yet, and honestly, it’s quite a lot. “How could I have forgotten there was a library up here? Your dad mentioned it on my first day.”
“I know,” he murmurs, his voice not so far away anymore. “If I knew you actually liked to read, I probably would have brought you up here sooner.”
“Right,” I laugh. “For some reason, I can’t picture you having done that before now.”
A soft chuckle comes from behind me and my warmth spreads through me at the sound and the rare carefree moment between us. “You’re right. I would have had Maryne send you up here to clean so you could have claimed that you found it on your own.”
I turn around and meet his eyes, stopping as I find him staring right back at me, but not just at my face, right down into my soul. “You would have done that?” I question, lowering my voice, afraid of how it might break.
He nods and slowly takes a step toward me, making the butterflies turn into murderous little bitches, making me feel as though I could throw up. His voice is low and velvety and has me wanting so much more. “I don’t want to hurt you anymore, Jade,” he murmurs. “But you were right after the funeral. You are my outlet and hurting you makes me feel something, feel part of me that I thought didn’t exist.”
I take a hesitant step toward him. “I told you it’s okay.”
“It’s not,” he says shaking his head. “I shouldn’t be hurting you. I shouldn’t be constantly trying to push you away. I should be holding on and doing everything in my power not to lose you because you’re fucking worth it, Jade. I’ve never met anyone like you. You’re so fucking strong and the fact that you’re still standing here, willing to allow me to fuck you up just to make me feel something proves that.”
“You’ve only ever hurt me with words, Colton, but your actions have always spoken so much louder.”
He swallows and I see the fear in his eyes, not knowing what the hell is happening between us, and truthfully, I feel it too. This whole relationship is on a level of fucked-up that I’ve never experienced before and I honestly don’t know what any of it means.
He steps into me and takes my waist, pulling me the rest of the way into his chest. His eyes meet mine, heated, wild, and desperate. His tongue slips out and runs over his bottom lip and I instantly become hypnotized. “Maybe I don’t need to hurt you to make me feel.”
My heart races and before I can say a word or even begin working out what the hell he just meant by that comment, his lips are pressing down on mine and completely destroying me.
My hands slide up his toned arms until they’re wrapping around his neck and holding him tight. His tongue sweeps into my mouth and I welcome it like my next breath.
I’m falling hard. Too fucking hard. Colton Carrington is going to destroy me and I’m going to let him.
I need to pull away before I allow him the power to truly hurt me because once I hand my heart over, I don’t know if I’ll ever get it back. Yet I can’t stop. I can’t pull away. I can’t force myself to let go. I need him like nothing I’ve ever needed before.
His fingers brush my skin like a caress and my knees instantly go weak. He takes hold of my jaw and tilts my head, opening my neck for him to take. His lips move from mine and he sets every nerve ending on fire as they trail down below my ear.
Colton’s thumb brushes over my lips as his other hand trails down my body, claiming every curve until his fingers are flirting with the waistband of my shorts just above my ass. Getting no objection from me, his hand slips inside my pants and he grabs my ass, giving it a firm squeeze.
I press my ass back into his hand, needing more and he obliges just as I knew he would. My shorts are pushed down and I step out of them before he pulls my shirt over my head, leaving me completely naked and free to do with as he pleases.
Needing to feel his body on mine, I go to reach for his shirt but his hand drops from my jaw and he’s lifting me before I even know what’s going on.