“Thanks, but I don’t know what to tell them, Regina,” he says in a low voice. “How do I tell a six-year-old that her mother can’t come to her birthday party because she planned a trip to Hawaii the same week and doesn’t want to cancel? How do I look my son in the eye and tell him his mother loves him, when she can’t be bothered to visit even for a day?”
He is silent for a moment and then says bitterly, “That selfish bitch.” Even though he doesn’t raise his voice, it’s heart-breaking. He swallows heavily before continuing, his expression grim. “I shouldn’t be angry at Sandy, but I am. I don’t give a fuck if she cares about me, but she should make time for our kids. Between flying to Belize and clubbing with her skanky friends, she should do something for Rico, Rufus, Rachel, Rebecca and Ronnie. But she doesn’t give a shit.”
Ryan stops suddenly and the anger disappears from his face, replaced by despair. He’s so vulnerable, and so heartbroken. I want to hold him close, to just stroke his hair and let him cry on my shoulder. I want to let him weep until all of the pain is swept away.
“I’m sorry, Regina,” he says in a choked voice. “You didn’t need to hear all of that. The kids have me, and they have you, and as for Sandy—”
“As for Sandy, nothing.” I say gently. “We’ll handle it the best we can.” His eyes look defeated, but I press on. “You’re angry and sad on their behalf, but those are your emotions and not theirs. The kids have you, Ryan. Maybe that’s enough for them.” He stares at me in shock. This is clearly a new concept, and I press on. “You may be more than enough for them, and you’ve done a great job as a single dad. Plus, now they have me too. I love them and you love them, and I’ve had conversations with some of the house staff. They love the kids too.”
His facial expression is unreadable, and maybe I’ve gone too far, but I decide to press forward. “When they ask me about their mother, we’ll remind them of everyone who loves them. They will never want for love Ryan. This anger you feel, this resentment…” I take a deep breath because I may be crossing a line. “You’re drinking poison every single day and it’s making you miserable. But what I say, is let it go. Put the bottle of poison down, and be grateful for what you have. You have five wonderful children, and that’s a miracle in and of itself.”
He stares at me, his handsome features unreadable. Those blue eyes have gone dark, and suddenly, my heart races. I’ve definitely crossed a line. Oh no, he’s going to fire me on the spot. Quickly, I open my mouth to apologize, but before I can speak, Ryan leans forward, puts his hand on the back of my head, and pulls me in for a devastating kiss.
When he pulls back, we’re both panting.
“Where did you come from, Regina?” he whispers harshly. “What did I do to deserve you?”
8
Regina
Everything about kissing Ryan will lead to stress, awkwardness and unhappiness. Everything about kissing Ryan will lead to me losing my job. I know this full well, but I ignore the words because Ryan’s kiss is a powerful one. It claims me, and thrills me to my core. His tongue delves into my mouth and explores territory he’s taking as his own.
Helplessly, my hands go to his shirt, scrabbling at it to get it untucked and off him. I can’t wait though, because when just the smallest amount of bronzed skin is exposed, my hands go there, sliding up over his abdomen and exploring the delineated ridges. I thrill at the feel of this handsome man, and the heat of his body overwhelms me.
My brain still screams warnings at me, but it becomes easier with every passing second to ignore them, and I do. I ignore every consequence and give myself over to his kiss. His mouth leaves mine briefly and his lips nuzzle at my earlobe.
“Is this okay, Regina?” he whispers in my ear.
I can’t even answer. I just nod mutely, and then his hands come to the bottom of my blouse and he lifts it up. I hear a button pop, but don’t give a damn that it’s my favorite white shirt.
His mouth leaves my ear as the blouse comes over my head and when our eyes meet, I see pure adoration. This man believes that I’m beautiful, and for a moment, I do too. His gaze worships me, sliding over my lush curves and making me heat up from the inside.
“You’re so goddamn gorgeous, Regina,” he rasps. “Even more beautiful than I imagined.”