But Gage’s visit, his words had shaken some of the cupboards of my minds so hard that the skeletons came out.
Not the bodies, of course. All of those were out in the open, except one. Crime and murder wasn’t something I had to keep a secret from my family, even now when things were as close to the straight and narrow as they’d ever be—that being a definite curve away from anything resembling normal society.
My skeletons were different. The ones I even hid from myself. That shameful yearning for the white picket fence, the dog—heck, maybe even the kids. The whole package. The fairy tale. With the man who represented all of that, the safety and order.
Luke.
But his version of safety and order was destroying the thing he considered a threat to that.
The Sons of Templar.
One hell of a Catch-22.
One of the many, many reasons that I shouldn’t think of that. Couldn’t. But didn’t a girl always want what she couldn’t have?
I downed my tequila, warm and cheap, but you couldn’t find anything else around here. It did the job. Kind of.
I twirled a piece of metal in my hand. An extremely dangerous one. Not a knife, or a gun. Worse than that.
A cell phone.
I’d purchased it in one of those shitty electronic shops that smelled of cigarette smoke and were packed to the gills with rudimentary rip-offs of all of the big names. It worked well enough. I was fingering the one thing I didn’t discard along with my phone. My SIM card.
Inserting it into the phone would mean that my old life would come tumbling back in, would mean that Cade, or even Luke, could find me. If he was actually looking for me, which was doubtful, if our last meeting was anything to go by.
Because of—or in spite of—tequila, my mind went there. To the last place it should have.
The past. With Luke. With my family. With everyone.
It stayed there for a long time.
I emerged from the past much like a person would surface from the water after almost drowning: breathless and gasping for air. Swimming around back there wasn’t healthy.
I tipped my head back and welcomed my shot of tequila.
I’d lost count of how many.
Not enough or too much, obviously, with my little trip down memory lane.
I regarded the SIM card. I was fucked now, so why not make it another signature Rosie Fuck-Up?
I inserted the card, waiting for the screen to light up. Which it did. Missed calls, voice mails, texts. The list was long; I guessed I should’ve counted myself lucky to have that many people caring about me. That many people who loved me.
Gwen: Hey, sis, so the hubby is a little worried about you. And so am I. I need a drinking buddy. Your nephew is entering the terrible twos, and Amy is pregnant and can’t drink. Which means she’s almost worse than the toddler. Okay, she’s definitely worse than the toddler. Please come home. I miss you and love you.
Gwen: And by a little worried, I mean Cade has broken four pieces of furniture.
Amy: Everyone’s having babies. And now Brock wants one. Despite the damage it will do to my vagina. I need backup. Not just for the vagina stuff.
Ashley: Hey, my love. I know why you needed to go, even though you never said anything. I get it. Just remember you have an entire family that loves you. That needs you. You’re the crazy glue that holds us all together.
Polly: My sister is lost without you. Which means I’m lost without you. She moved to LA. You were supposed to do that together. Come home.
PS. I’m in love and his name is Jared.
Bex: I’m betting you’ve already ditched your phone, because you don’t want to be found and you’re not an idiot. What you did for Gabriel and me, for the club, there are no words. I know what it cost you. Heal, then come home. You’ve got a wedding to be in, bridesmaid. You can wear anything you like. As long as it’s not fucking pink.
Mia: Hey, honey. Know you’re out doing your thing. Being you. Your family is a little worried, and us girls are battling toddlers trying to get out alive. We need you to dole out the drinks and keep us insane.
Lily: Hey, Rosie, I don’t know if you’ll get this, and if you do, I’m sure it’s lost in between all Cade’s text versions of frenzied grunts, lol. But I just wanted to tell you that I’m pregnant too! Asher won’t let me find out what it is. He wants a surprise. I hate surprises. Must be something in the water around here. Maybe it’s a good thing you left, morning sickness sucks.
Lucy: I’ve sent a thousand and twenty-one texts and left as many voice mails but I’m still going to send a thousand more. You’re my best friend. No matter what. Even though you leave me behind without a word to navigate this shit show called life without my partner in crime. It’s your fault if I get locked up because I don’t have you to drive the getaway car.